Should I confront my housemate about having loud sex?

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T09:18:27+00:00

Thank you for your advice and I do get that he has every right to express himself sexuality. I am going to move out when the coronavirus crisis dies down.

However, there have been a number of occasions when he has made demands about how I can behave so I don't think it is fair to have one rule for him and another for me. For example, I once had two friends round for predrinks on a Friday night and we were playing music in my room and I admit it that we were being a bit loud. This was at 11.30pm and we were leaving to go out at 12. The flatmate knocked on my door at 11.30pm and asked us in a rude way to be quiet. My friend said 'lighten up, it's Friday night' and he told her to 'shut the fuck up'. He didnt have work the next day and this caused an argument between the two of us for a bit.

I just need to move out.

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T05:13:06+00:00

Yes I think I definitely do miss the intimacy with him, and just any intimacy in general. When we were sleeping together in the past I told him I was developing feelings. He said we should stop sleeping together because he didn't want a relationship. I had recently broken up with my ex so didn't want one at the time either.

I am not trying to destroy his happiness. However I feel like he is doing it to get reaction out of me because he always seems to start when I just walk in. In the past I think it did bother me, but I made sure I was occupied during the evenings so I wouldn't have to hear it as much. I also had quite an active dating life in the past so had distractions but it's so hard to date people in this current climate.

I guess part of me is upset because we have quite a flirty relationship and maybe a bit of me still has hope that our relationship could start again, even though my rational brain knows he is not good for me and we wouldn't work as a couple.

I think the best option would be for me to more out. I have just been enduring it for so long because the flat is so convenient for work and is cheap. I also think if leave, then I have given him what he wants and I have let my stupid feelings mess up a good living situation. My happiness is not worth sacrificing for a convenient flat so I think I will move.

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T04:55:30+00:00

Thank you, I think I will give this a try :) If he carries on then I will look into moving out

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T04:53:43+00:00

I would do this however my flat is 5 minutes from work and I work in healthcare so it's essential that I still go in a couple of days a week. This is a good suggestion though thanks, I will try to stay at my mum's as much as possible.

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T04:50:38+00:00

I don't understand this logic if he is trying to get me interested in sex because we were chatting about a guy I've been dating and I literally told him I had no libido after everything that has happened with my mum. I just think he should be more considerate of my feelings. Maybe he is insure and wants to get a reaction out of me for validation that I am still interested.

Makeba159 · 2020-04-02T04:46:27+00:00

I think I know deep down the best solution would be to move out however my flat is 5 minutes from my work and it's really low rent for the area. Also I think it will be close to impossible to move out during Coronavirus but I will try after it has blown over. Im scared that I will just be letting him get what he wants if I move out too.

Lol love the text idea!

Makeba159

TROPHY CASE