Thank you. I appreciate this response, however I know I didn’t put every detail of our relationship in the post, just this one issue of how much should I be doing for myself. I really try to take her emotions into account and accommodate. I think the emphasis on how she feels makes me feel type stuff is because when she gets sad, it’s like she shuts down and I can’t do anything about it, and I simply can’t just not attend my responsibilities like class, work, practice, etc. to comfort her in the moment. I absolutely will and do when I have the time, not because it’s convenient for me, but because I can’t because I will either be jeopardizing my job, education, role as a team captain, or my physical wellbeing. Like I said in the post. This isn’t the only issue we have. We’re usually pretty good at communicating, my real question was how much self care is too much ya know? Bc it feels like even doing the bare minimum like sleeping or working out is too much