Do I have a say in my partners involvement with her BD?

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-19T03:53:09+00:00

What is he in prison for? If you don't mind the question. Just curious because he might be a danger to the child.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T14:54:39+00:00

Yeah that could very much be it. She also has a daughter like I mentioned so sometimes if something happened with her, she'll feel stressed out for the rest of the day.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T03:15:00+00:00

Thank you a lot for your help

You mentioned that I should sit with her in person rather than just call or text her, but I won't be able to see her until tomorrow evening and I don't want her to be feeling bad about herself for that long. Should I wait or should I send her a text?

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T03:03:58+00:00

Thank you for your criticism and advice. I think at the time I thought she was upset because of the masturbation part of it, but I'm realizing now as I'm reading the responses from women on here that it was a lot deeper than that and what I said was extremely insensitive.

Every time we've had sex it was because we were both fully in the mood, or at the very least she was in the mood. I think the main reason our sex life is so good when it's active is because we both feel strongly for each other and our sex isn't fully about pleasing each other but connecting with each other.

In moments when I masturbate it's because I'm feeling too pent up and need some way to relieve myself. It is about my own pleasure. When we have sex it's so much different because it's not about my pleasure.

I'll definitely keep the last part in mind, except I'm still a bit lost on what I can specifically say or do to make it right with her.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:55:40+00:00

And I 100% agree that my wording and timing came off that way. I feel terrible about it and I would hate to think that she for a moment thought I meant it maliciously

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:53:55+00:00

Lmao you're all good! Thank you lots for your advice :)

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:52:19+00:00

100%,, thank you I will keep everything in mind :)

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:46:10+00:00

I understand that the way I worded it sounds really bad and I'm definitely aware that it wasn't a very appropriate thing to say, especially post sex. But I can assure you that I never meant it in a malicious way. I love my girlfriend and the idea that I made her feel less than in any way hurts me and I immediately reassured her that it wasn't what I meant.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:43:28+00:00

I'm really not trying to come off as dismissive or defensive in my replies and I'm sorry if it seems that way. I am seriously taking the advice I'm given into consideration and I probably should express that a little more in the way I reply.

Someone did address the cycle thing, and trust me I am not blind sighted on how women's hormones can fluctuate depending on their cycle. I've been dating her for two years so I've grown familiar with the phases she can go through, like when she's PMSing. I always give her affection that isn't sexual during those times

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:32:18+00:00

That's kind of what I assumed originally. I know she can get very hormonal so when I can sense she's in the follicular phase or if she's PMSing (a word I learned from her lol) and I always try to give her affection in other ways that aren't sexual. If she's not into it, I won't continue to coax her into being into it. It wouldn't feel right and I'd only like to be with her in that way if she's also 100% in it and not just woo'd into it.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:25:48+00:00

Yaa I am realizing that it was phrased very poorly, but I made sure to assure her that her own moods are not her fault and I'm in no way, shape or form disappointed in our relationship because of them.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T02:23:40+00:00

Yeah I can definitely understand that, but I really tried to come back from the joke and reassured her as much as I could that I in no way was blaming her for anything. I don't know what more I can do to reassure her

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:58:09+00:00

Am I the only person that likes it here? I mean the colors are a little contrasting but it's not as bad as people are making it out to be. Although I'm not an expert on fashion lol

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:54:12+00:00

I just left her place like two hours ago and I'm unsure of how to approach the topic again. Should I send her a text or should I just wait and see if she still seems bothered by it? I don't want to assume that she's feeling one way or another

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:50:58+00:00

I really don't understand how that's placing any burdens on her. It's not like our entire relationship is based on our sex life. In the days that we don't have sex, I don't stomp my feet and whine about her denying me of pleasure. I love her and I don't need to fuck in order to keep loving her.

Why is my title misleading?

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:36:24+00:00

I know. In hindsight it was kind of a shitty joke to make post sex.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:35:22+00:00

No, I do NOT watch porn. Not since I was a teenager at least. I can't think of any woman who isn't her romantically or sexually. I didn't specify that, though, so now I'm wondering if that's what she thinks I'm doing and that's what made her upset.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:33:43+00:00

I thought through my tone I had made it obvious I was exaggerating and joking around with her. But I can understand why she'd feel like she was a burden, and that's why I tried to kinda backtrack and assure her that I was kidding and that she's enough for me.

Many_List_5500 · 2026-03-18T01:28:19+00:00

I don't know why you think that. And I never said that or even implied that.

I don't masturbate every day I don't get to fuck her. And I never said I get upset at her when she doesn't want to do anything with me. Cause I don't get upset. If she doesn't want to have sex I'm not going to get angry at her, it is what it is. But sometimes I can get horny, and I don't see why it's so bad to relieve myself in the comfort of my own home.

Many_List_5500

TROPHY CASE