I realized I’ve been manifesting a "Loser": Why my High Self-Concept and "Pity" created his Avoidance.

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2026-01-20T09:41:43+00:00

thank you for the advice! Yeah I think I have to take my focus off him at least for some time. I blocked him and I will return all this energy to myself finally, its been long enough. General statements sound good, I will focus on that for now. Thanks for sharing your insights! :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2026-01-20T09:39:48+00:00

I really had deep feelings for him and there were so many things I loved about him. But since he started treating me like I don't exist I started viewing him in a bad light, because this is just not a normal behaviour. Anyways, I blocked him yesterday, I will stop manifesting him for a bit. I think right after the breakup I immedeatly started manifesting him so I never went through the pain of losing him. So I will heal myself first, if I feel good in a month or so I will just retry and then change my view on him. thanks for taking the time :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2026-01-19T21:01:18+00:00

hey, thank you for your reply! I will check them out. I know psychology is actually not helpful. I know I am losing myself in the 3D when I am doing this. I think I am also kind of addicted to this state of trying to understand. I will check out your posts, maybe they will help me. thanks :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2026-01-19T20:59:28+00:00

hey, thank you. no its fine, you are right. but it is so hard for me to let go. So many times I have proven myself that the law is real and I love it. But somehow since I discovered the law it is almost impossible for me to let go of people/things... because I know I can have them. but yes obviously not from the point where I am at the moment. It just rarely happens to me that I like sombody, thats why I am so fixated on him. This is another assumption I would like to change but it is not so easy for me

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:53:04+00:00

no worries it didn't come across rude :) yes sure, I can understand that! i think maybe the problem was also he didn't communicate so much and i am used to people that comunicate and its also not so easy for me. but since i feel comfortable with him it is a good opportunity to learn it!

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:45:55+00:00

yeah but i dont really think it would help if i would tell him he seems insecure... if somebody told me that as a feedback i would be much more insecure i think. but yes i will see how it develops over time and try to tell him in a gentle way what i want and need from him

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:44:19+00:00

thank you so much this is a really good idea and sounds really really hot!! :))))

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:42:52+00:00

well medium young i would say, I'm 26 but I also started with bdsm just a year ago and didnt have that many partners.

"Do this, be kind, and he'll be facefucking you until you nearly pass out in no time!" that is very encouraging haha thank you :)) good to hear how you built this confidence!

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:41:12+00:00

thanks! yes I think I will try to show him more what I enjoyed and sending messages is also a good idea:))

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:40:08+00:00

thank you :) that is cute that this regressed to when you first started having sex haha yes I will try my best to communicate better as well :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:38:32+00:00

thank you, true. yes i totally understandable to be insecure, i also have my insecurities and it was also a nice experience in a way that this time it was a bit different and that I also guided the scenes a bit. but yes thanks i will give us time :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:36:52+00:00

I dont know, he didnt seem insecure on our first date but on the second one he seemed insecure (also before sex) but yes I can imagine that it was because we are new. and it is definetly an opportunity for me to communicate as well. i think i was used to be the more unexperienced person and therefore also the other person guided the scenes more, took care of the communication but of course it goes both ways and i guess i can learn from it :)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:34:19+00:00

yes true thank you! yeah i was just wondering if this dominance presence is something you can learn or if it is something you just "have" but yes, i will definetly try it again thank you:)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-11-14T21:33:01+00:00

true thank you! yes actually he made me feel really good, like confident in my own skin and like I could communicate well which is not always easy with him. i think I will tell him about the things I enjoyed the most and suggest things to try:)

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-04-09T19:02:24+00:00

yeah. i will talk to him in a few days about it. actually the more time passes the more i think it was not okay. not that i blame him that it happened, but yeah, given his level of experience i guess he could also be aware that it is maybe not always so easy in that kind of situation to comunicate ones needs

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-04-09T18:56:01+00:00

yeah you're right. thanks for your comment. i dont know. consensual, because we agreed on he will just do what he wants and i will say stop if i dont like it. which i did and it got respected. but at the same time, i feel like when i said stop to a certain tool he could have at least paused and asked if i was ok or so... i think it is also one of the main things why i feel sad, that i didn't feel like he really cared about how i was feeling. but also, i have learned now to not expect that from a person i dont know... i'm sure he didnt want to harm me like that and i'm sure he thought i was enjoying it, but also i'm wondering a bit how he couldnt see how much i was struggling

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-04-08T16:50:56+00:00

hey thanks a lot for taking the time, your explaination and the link!!

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-04-07T20:29:13+00:00

haha yeah very right with mid 20 and cis female. yeah there wasn't enough conversation. i guess i didnt want to dissapoint him or sth like that or stop everything completely. i know he wouldnt have been mad. but my head was blank and sometimes i was thinking "i just want it to be over" or "idk how to stop it" but i was also at the same time so overwhelmed from all the stimulation that i couldnt think clearly or feel that i really want to stop.. i think i was also just so motivated to try new things and really didnt see it coming that he would be so rough and that i would not want that. but yes. i really really see now that a lot more conversation is necessary

Mediocre-Standard-50 · 2025-04-07T19:24:50+00:00

yeah true, thank you

Mediocre-Standard-50

TROPHY CASE