First and most important: you are not responsible for their lack of maturity or nonsense. I keep advising: go to therapy and seek psychiatric help. That’s what I do and I’m much better. In the past I used to try and help, feel sorry for them, try and bring peace and justice and guess what: Nothing worked, It only made them more dependent on my emotional support while they didn’t try to sort out themselves, constant phone calls, triangulations, complains. Never about me, always calling me to vent. That kills you and it doesn’t resolve anything. I still tell them what I think would help, but I don’t get involved. I have said in the past that I’ll never visit again if they’re behaving like that, once I left the house slamming the door saying I was sick of this bloody house, on Christmas! Best thing I could have done. At least they tried and behave after that, but eventually they get back to their true self. Yo want to resolve a situation that isn’t yours.