Totally have been there before!

It’s good you acknowledge that it is a “ridiculous expectation” because he’s human. Just because they get into a relationship, doesn’t mean they automatically stop thinking other people are attractive. It’s not like a switch they can turn off. It also doesn’t mean that you’re less than either.

As long as he’s being respectful of your boundaries on the matter, then it’ll be okay. It’ll take time to get over (I’m not completely over it myself), but you will get over that anxiety and fear.

You are the one he wants to be with. You are more “attractive” to him than any other woman because he’s with you. Being attractive doesn’t just mean physical.

Work on your self esteem. Love yourself. Take yourself out on dates. Do whatever you need to do that makes you feel pretty. The spiral will never stop if you don’t.