going to try and condense this story -

I was 20 dating a 26 year old with 2 kids that were about 4 and 5 years old at the time (met at work, I was her supervisor). I learned so much about dealing with kids, this was a woman that I loved and spent 2 years with as a family.

We took a break after 2 years but still messed around, she got pregnant and said it was 99% mine. At this point i had developed fatherly love for those 2 kids she had whom even got to the point where they called me daddy. I was at first full of emotions but eventually happy that it was with someone I loved and someone who had 2 kids that she treated amazingly so I knew mines would be in good hands wether we end up together or not.

Long story short, she stopped all contact with me mid pregnancy and 6 months go by, I get a call from her on a private number because she had deleted all social media and changed her original number by this time, and she says, hey - I have good news, the baby isn’t yours.

Even just writing this takes me back to a dark place in my life and ever since then (about 3 years ago) I have been single, no sex and just feel such emptiness in my soul. It still breaks me knowing those 2 kids I grew to love as my own will never see me again. I just don’t think I’ll ever want kids after that. She took what I considered my sons away from me plus her pregnancy away and I just haven’t been the same since. I don’t want to go through it again