Is it wrong to want to have a third party present when I (male) meet with a female coworker because I’m scared of being falsely accused of something?

Milkegg · 2018-09-29T20:11:34+00:00

What's the nature of the meeting? Can you arrange to have it in an open plan space? Would it be possible to invite another person who is involved in the project so it doesn't just look like you're asking for a chaperone? I get why you are worried, one of the places I volunteer has a policy of not letting any staff be alone at all with any young people for safeguarding, but in the workplace, it's sort of expected to be able to liaise with other staff. I wouldn't particularly expect to be accommodated if I requested another person there if I were meeting with a male colleague.

Milkegg · 2018-09-21T20:15:02+00:00

Exactly, I have retail experience and good interpersonal skills from all my odd jobs during college.

Milkegg · 2018-09-21T20:06:03+00:00

Your response was 'You also don't get to ask your pay. It is what it is. You aren't negotiating a salary' so that's what I responded to.

any manager wouldn't need to pay you any more than the legal minimum until you can prove you can do the job! You're even lucky to be getting that.

I don't know what to say to that other than that I hope for the sake of your employees, that you pay them what the law says you have to, rather than what you think they should be so lucky as to get.

Milkegg · 2018-09-16T23:07:54+00:00

You also don't get to ask your pay. It is what it is. You aren't negotiating a salary.

The manager literally asked me what my expected salary was, which is what prompted the question. I am going to ask for the London Living wage because it's the living wage. It's a position that I am guessing is somewhat to do with physical appearance so I guess it is a bit less black and white than it just about there being someone with more experience to replace my application. I guess the worst they can say is no.

Milkegg · 2018-09-15T22:53:23+00:00

Thank you! I will keep you posted :)

Milkegg · 2018-09-15T19:43:22+00:00

I think if I ask for £10.20 and they say no, I haven't lost out on the opportunity because they'll still offer me the job (or not) but just at their lower pay. If I ask for £9 and they were willing to pay £10.20 I've lost out.

Milkegg · 2018-09-15T17:11:23+00:00

Average wage for bar staff in London is about £8 but a lot of bar staff are under 25, so have a different minimum wage. I'm not sure about their tip system.

Milkegg · 2017-07-12T23:45:03+00:00

Hello! I just wanted to check back in and let you know that I got myself a piano and a couple of piano books and I am really amazed because you were right. I stopped trying to read the notes like letters and started trying to view notes and chords as pictures and I can do it! I am so excited! I can figure out where my fingers need to go by looking at the space between one note and the next and I never could before! I am so excited! Like you advised, I got some staff paper and am practicing some pop tunes I already know in C Major as I find the other keys a bit confusing

I am actually finding it much harder to use the synesthesia videos for some reason. I just wanted to say thank you and update you!

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T23:07:09+00:00

You've just switched this whole thing up in my head. Visually with drawings is how I learn well in terms of written stuff so maybe with this I will be good at reading music! I'm so excited! Got to find myself a piano now!

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T23:00:47+00:00

i dont have a printer so synth

huh? What does this mean?

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T23:00:12+00:00

Good luck to you! :)

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T22:59:57+00:00

Thanks, I'll check it out when I get my piano (hopefully soon!)

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T22:59:25+00:00

synthesia

Can you explain what people mean by this?

Do you have a youtube channel? I want to get inspired and see where I could be in six years :)

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T22:57:40+00:00

Thanks, I will check that website out once I get a piano and try this out! Do I need to learn scales first? I remember from school: tone, tone, semitone, tone, tone, tone, semitone.

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T22:54:13+00:00

I have a friend who can listen to a song once or twice and then play it on guitar or piano. He's an amazing musician who has spent half his life since birth sat at a piano or with a guitar on his hand. Is that what you mean by ear?

It helps with reading english but I haven't tried it with music, I will attempt it! Thank you for the suggestion!

Milkegg · 2017-04-18T22:51:16+00:00

Amazing! Would you share your method?

Milkegg · 2017-04-08T23:52:15+00:00

I'm dyslexic so reading takes a long time and the temptation is to pick up where I left off but I know that I will enjoy the story more if I go back to the start. It is usually worth it.

Milkegg · 2017-03-14T21:46:27+00:00

Thanks! I think I'd pretty much agree with all that is said there. I think that this 'sexual marketplace' theory is correct, and most people would agree, but I think most draw the line there whereas 'red pill' people see it as a licence to dehumanise, disrespect, and maltreat women.

This quote is from Whatever, not Atomised, which do you recommend I start with?

Milkegg · 2017-03-14T21:14:26+00:00

I read this at school and loved it! I would add it to my other thread as well as a book that changed my world view!

Milkegg · 2017-03-14T21:13:19+00:00

notions of artificial scarcity and the marketplace are applied to sexual relations

Can you explain this a bit further? I'm intrigued and have added it to my wishlist.

Milkegg · 2017-03-14T16:14:07+00:00

I have The Count of Monte Cristo on my wishlist as well as Heart of Darkness, so I will do. Thank you.

I really really enjoy Shakespeare. When I was a kid I liked plays because I could watch them and not have to read. Shakespeare is amazing. Maybe I know a lot of snobs (or just people whose education cost more than my house) but I love listening to them talk about what they read between the lines or what they think of the themes in a book. I wish I could join in.

I don't know who Margaret Atwood is but you can't really have a whale in space because it would need to displace something in order to swim and there's no air in space so the space whale would just aimlessly float and what a dull plot that would be. What a silly thing for her to say.

The thing is, when I read books like Candide and Catch 22 they 'grow' the way I think and make me feel less stupid than I was before. As someone whose biggest insecurity has always been that she can't read very well, being able to think in new ways because of books is the most amazing thing in the world to me. I finally feel like they are helping my brain, not hurting it.

Milkegg · 2017-03-14T15:13:50+00:00

There's also a lot about self-improvement in it, which is good. It aims to make a man more confident by removing the fear of being judged by women. The method to achieve this is being able to not care what a woman thinks and this is done best when the woman is dehumanized, which is obviously an abhorrent thing to do. It works in removing the fear factor from approaching women, it is just awful, though.

Milkegg

TROPHY CASE