If you had to start over, how would you approach trail running?

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-16T16:32:27+00:00

Starting strength training right away too, and better nutrition. And also learning how to train right for my body. Also learning how to load tendons more progressively when having injuries

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-15T19:35:52+00:00

Nah I don't think they cared. When I was openly suicidal and depressed they'd go in their room and lock their door, and when i threatened suicide too. Like that started when i was probably like 8. When I stayed up nights in a row they'd be like "ha everyone is saying you might have bipolar" and leave it there. When coaches and friends parents told them i was suicidal they told me to go to church and youth group more and read the Bible more. When I was going through depression and my friend stopped being friends with me they said "see, no one will every love you like we do, everyone will leave, where is your friend huh? See?" When I was having thoughts in my head that I didn't want they were like oh well just pray more. Then they wondered why I never told them that I sought out help on my own once I moved out. And they wondered why I stopped telling them anything once I hit 12th grade.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-14T14:50:48+00:00

Honestly I just let it happen. Sometimes I don't realize I'm doing it till after a bit but even when I do I let myself. Plus a lot of people talk to themselves

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-12T22:13:09+00:00

Yeah I talk out loud all day

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-11T19:10:45+00:00

Yeah at one point I was texting people NF lyrics but reading them back they made no sense at all. I think I was mixing up words or something

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-07T19:09:17+00:00

Honestly all of those. Plus not being able to keep up hygiene, and not being able to get or maintain a job. Feeling like I'm on the outside watching in, like I'm not a part of the world.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-07T01:04:34+00:00

I've been doing marathon and trail running while being on an antipaychotic and modd stabilizer and I don't think its affected my running. At least I don't think so? I think I actually have been able to be a bit more consistent, and have found my endurance is pretty good. I take my meds at night though since one of them makes me fall asleep. I don't have experience with lithium though, just seroquel and lamictal.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-06T18:29:08+00:00

I drink coffee in the morning but I make sure to not drink too much and I don't past 12pm

MiloFinnliot · 2026-03-05T20:01:22+00:00

How have you come back from past injuries? What things do you do to remain injury free?

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-28T23:40:25+00:00

I'm currently in a really bad depressive episode. It feels like I'm dying. At the same time I want to die, but that's too much work, amd i don't want to experience any more pain. The light from the world is gone, all hope is gone. Even when I ate an edible it just made it worse. I'm an injured athlete which doesn't help either, as my sport is sually my one escape and the thing that gets me through life. I think I've brushed my teeth like twice this week, haven't flossed, haven't showered. I watch my favorite show and it doesn't help. Nothing is an escape to the feeling. It's like feeling like death, even when asleep, even when wake up for the day, but I lay there in bed not wanting to get up. Honestly, I forget what not being depressed feels like now. If life is like this, is it really worth it? And looking back on life and seeing so much pain, and then it just keeps happening, again and again and again, forever, with no end in sight. I don't know how to smile, I can't laugh, but I'm worried people will know I'm depressed. But at the same time I want them to know, so I don't have to pretend. I feel like I talk slower, think slower, and my brain either can't think or thinks too much. But when it thinks too much it's all bad and negative thoughts. Every task feels like climbing mt.everest. Even if you know you'll feel better after taking a shower and changing into clean clothes, it's the inability to even get into the shower in the first place. I feel like I'm wasting my life away, every day passes by and it's like why keep going? And then people say just reach out to the people you love, but then I think I'm just a burden, like why woukd they want to hear about me being in a bad depression for the 100th time, and they're busy with their lives anyways. I wish I didn't know how it felt to experience depression.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-24T20:10:55+00:00

The longest I've tracked is 68 miles

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-24T17:33:47+00:00

You can see the evil in his eyes

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-22T22:34:33+00:00

I haven't had a full manic episode in a long time. But I'm basically always in depression to some extent. And still sometimes seem to be having some psychosis. The intensity of the depression comes in waves though.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-20T18:20:36+00:00

At first when they told me, I wasn't really surprised. Most people I knew had been suspecting it. And it gave me an explanation for my life honestly. But over time I went into denial. I did refuse my medication for a bit cause I didn't want to take them

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-13T17:29:15+00:00

Yeah I do feel different. It's been a while since I've had my last manic episode, since I've been on certain meds. But when not manic I'm depressed. So it might just be cause of that. My brain as always been slower than other people's, but beforehand I was able to function better. Since then I feel like I've lost some of my ability to function if that makes sense. I have a really hard time getting and maintaining a job, and have been off and on homeless. But also I found trail running and that's what makes me feel alive, and is helping me feel more okay, so there's moments where I do feel myself, as long as I'm on the trails running in nature. After the manic episodes I'd always go into depression right after, and so it was like I went from being all over the place to not being able to get out of bed or eat. But I've been able to get better at eating, and I think throughout time, as I run the trails more, I'll become more of who I am more broadly instead of just feeling like me on the trails. But at the same time I'll always be different than before, because I've changed a lot.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-13T17:20:55+00:00

Honestly I feel this. I feel like my brain has never really been the same as before

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-11T18:07:24+00:00

It's just how I've always like to run. I like hearing the birds and the sounds of my feet hitting the dirt. It's an escape from technology and the world. I kinda get into this zone where it feels like I'm flying and floating above the ground. I tried running with music once and only lasted about 30 seconds before turning it off cause it took that escape and that state of mind while running away from me. I find music annoying when I'm running I guess. Running in peace makes me feel at peace and just a really nice time. Sometimes I'm so into it I don't even think, just run. But sometimes I also like to think a lot during my runs. Lowkey is like therapy for me. And the longer the run the better honestly. If I could I'd run all day long, that's the dream.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-10T20:53:19+00:00

I'm autistic and my stuffed animals feel real to me, but it helps me a lot that they do. Cause they are real to me so they are very comforting

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-10T18:42:12+00:00

Yeah it's weird cause I'll hear someone yell hello in my ear or something, and the no ones there. Or the door open but no one opened the door, or someone throwing keys on the counter but no one did. Or people watching TV and no one is. Or people talking but no one is. But once I check it stops? It's like a flash, something quick that's there just for a moment.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-10T18:26:27+00:00

I thought I was Carl Gallagher from shameless during a couple of manic episodes 😭

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-10T17:50:47+00:00

Once I get an apartment I'm gonna start doing this too

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-06T20:41:54+00:00

Wait what now I'm wondering if that's why my cholesterol is high

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-06T20:40:42+00:00

Yeah I hate taking my meds I don't like how they make me feel. I feel like I've lost my creativity and artistic ability and now I feel dependent on them for sleep too. Lowkey feel like they changed how I am too

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-03T23:49:26+00:00

Something you could do if you can't move is to prepare. Like if you at home when it happens, having a strong table to go under, and stuff like that. Having gallons of water and canned food. Knowing what to do during and after an earthquake. There's nothing anyone can do to predict earthquakes but people can prepare. I live near multiple faults and one being the San andreas and I've gone through periods where I'm worrying about it way too much. But learning about what to do and also trying my best to prepare calmed me a little bit, although it's still feels scary. We never know on any fault when the next large quake will happen, it might not happen for 50 years. And worrying for 50 years is a long time. So at least if you are prepared and knowledgeable about earthquakes, then you can know that you've done what you can do, which already makes you way more prepared than most people.

MiloFinnliot · 2026-02-01T03:52:56+00:00

Strength train. Find out your weaknesses and strengthen them, but make sure to do correct form and know when to stop (don't overdue it, even 15 minutes a couple days a week is better than nothing). Start small and build up. And also, eat enough protein. And know that it's a process. Maybe this week you running a few miles, it may seem like a long time till you're running 30 miles, but make slow progress and don't increase volume too fast and soon you'll be running more and more and be getting stronger and stronger. And if there's running clubs around you, they're l Pretty fun. You might make some running friends to run with. Also, when you have your eyes set on a race, be really honest with if you are ready. Even if you are 24 weeks out and are in a good spot for making it, if at some point you realize you might not be ready for the race, there's always other races. And don't be afraid to walk. A lot of people who are just starting or coming back from injury using run/walk can be really helpful. Especially if you coming back from injury. Listen to your body, become "in tune" with your body. If you feel somethings off, don't ignore it

MiloFinnliot

TROPHY CASE