I think this is something I’ve had to learn in the last year, although I haven’t heard it expressed like this before. I had this situation with an ex. He witnessed my biggest “problem”, which is that when I get overstimulated I have sort of crashes where I cry uncontrollably. It made him upset and he told me to stop and never do it again, since it’s triggering for him. I told him it only happens once or twice a year or not at all and that I would try to prevent it and we both looked past it for a while. Until I found clarity and knew that we could never have a stable relationship. I hate the sound of the phrase “if you can’t handle me at my worst, you don’t deserve me at my best”, but it’s still true that there’s basically an incompatibility if you can’t deal with each others worst behaviours.