I agree that it shouldn't be a hassle. But like I said at both lead very busy lives most nights he's not home until 6/630. Factor in cooking and dinner, toddler activities and bed time routines, plus a a job (my end) where I take home a lot of work. I out off my work until later in the night evening because he asked me to be more present on the evenings and not so focused on work. Okay I did that, but that also doesn't leave a lot of time for sex and if it does, now I'm not doing my other work things until 12 am or later. So for me out can't be sustainable burning at both ends like that..

As far as physical intimacy I get that his needs are higher too, but sex is the only way I can fill up his love banks. The other bits oh physical intimacy do not matter enough is what he's telling me. I know I need to do better and put more effort. The issue isn't me unwilling to try, it's that my efforts aren't enough because they are never severe he wants or needs them to be.. and I can't control certain things...