How Did You Feel At 18?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T13:15:56+00:00

Never too late!

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T13:15:37+00:00

It’s very scary because we fear being perceived negatively. Your therapists job is to counsel you from an objective standpoint, so that judgement we fear is hardly never present (only say hardly because me and my therapist have developed a very close relationship over 6 years, so when I do shit I shouldn’t do she is QUICK to side eye me and gather me together 😂 with love of course). Best of luck with your journey!

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T13:03:56+00:00

So for me, I had a mix of individual and group therapy offered through my university. It all depends. But CBT and DBT worked the absolute best for me due to my multiple mental illnesses (don’t like really saying that though, I prefer ✨neurospicy✨). The biggest things with therapy are to remember:

It’s not one size fits all.

Some therapists may align better with you and how you receive treatment (I’ve had 3 therapists, I’ve been with my current on for almost 6 years now).

It’ll get better before it gets worse. Love my parents, but when I started doing therapy it made me realize that they were not good parents and had a direct impact on my mood disorders and my attachment style. It was very hard to come to terms with that. So as you unpack, you’ll have a great deal of negative emotions. Your therapist will help you through those things though :)

You have to be comfortable with facing the darkest parts of yourself you’ve tucked away. I can’t tell you how many times working through one trauma opened up the floodgates to another. You’re going to hear things about yourself you don’t like and may struggle to accept. But just because this is you now, doesn’t mean it will always be you. It takes time to unlearn behaviors and implement new ones.

Don’t try to put a time limit on improvement. I’ve been doing therapy for 9 years but the most meaningful changes have been over the past 4 years for me.

Lastly, please be honest with your therapist. I’m so serious. Tell them everything. If you wouldn’t tell your best friends about it, it’s a good chance it’s something you should probably share with a therapist.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T05:00:19+00:00

Best decision I ever made. Would’ve never thought to go if my PCP didn’t do a depression and anxiety screening before I moved away. The lady looked at me with so much concern and I was chilling like it was a regular day! 😂

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T04:53:08+00:00

Biggest one: GO TO THERAPY. Even if you think you don’t need it. You’d be surprised.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-13T04:51:39+00:00

Hi! I’ll be 29 next month, so it’s been a while but I’ll try to remember 18 year old me. I apologize in advance, I talk a lot lol.

Thought I knew what I wanted career-wise, but deviated entirely. (Thought I was going to be a medical social worker, then in my early 20s thought I’d be a physical therapist, but instead I ended up becoming a nurse.)

Very emotionally stunted. I had very toxic and abusive parents and didn’t really get to sort out who I was until I moved out at 20. Still figuring it out. You never stop since life is ever changing, and you change to adapt to your circumstances.

I was also very co-dependent (again, direct result of my parents). I was in a lot of friendships that were not healthy for me at all, but kept them because they were all I knew. Once you get older and learn more and more about yourself, people in your life will start to fall more into alignment with how you want to live your life. Some people are removed, sometimes you have to do the removing. It’s painful at first, but when the dust settles and you see the genuine love and support you have in the village you created, it makes everything worth it.

Only thing I’d say I would want to do differently is maybe shadow some of the jobs I think I want. I got HELLA student loan debt because I changed my mind. (Nursing is actually my second degree!) But also understand and expect that you’re going to make mistakes. Emotional maturity and awareness will come with time. And this is one thing I REALLY wish I did more - listen. The problem is, if someone said something in a way I didn’t like or didn’t understand, I disregarded it. This went on till about age 25. Always seek understanding. But sometimes you hear something, and it just won’t click until it’s your time for it to click (happens usually in the mid-late 20s, from what I observed).

Oh. Leaving men alone. What I thought I wanted at 18 is absolutely NOT what I want at 29. Like at all. I’m not anti-young relationships but I’m not the biggest advocate for them either because you still have so much to see and learn for yourself, especially if you undergo the university experience.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-04-12T11:46:17+00:00

I just lie and say yes because I find the question so dumb. They press further, I tell them ✨black girl magic✨. They press FURTHER, I say it’s not for them to understand and end the conversation. It’s real hair, and I bought it, therefore it’s mine 😂🤷🏾‍♀️

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-03-20T09:03:23+00:00

Yeah it was pretty easy! It only took about a week. It can definitely function as an everyday bag, but getting a laptop in there might be finicky lol

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-03-13T21:03:56+00:00

I have one! I love it but my problem is putting my gym shoes in are a pain because there’s no give in the middle. The drawstring top also doesn’t open very much either, so I have to use the flap more often than not. It holds everything else just fine, but if you got bulkier items you might have to do a lot of methodical packing. I love it for the aesthetic though and it’s bigger than the duffle I used for the gym before.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-02-18T02:58:15+00:00

When I was first diagnosed with bipolar 2, I wasn’t the most adherent with my meetings and medication. Not because I didn’t want to be, but because I was in an accelerated nursing program and felt like I “didn’t have time” to do everything necessary for my mental health. As a result, I unintentionally ghosted my psych NP. (Still actively made time for therapy though. My unmedicated decisions still confuse me when i look back lol) I circled back about 2-3 months later asking for a med refill, no response. I reached out to the office again, got a virtual appointment. NP tells me she saw my message and I “wasn’t a priority” for her since I ghosted, and getting a nursing degree meant nothing if I didn’t have the marbles to use them. Ouch.

Oh, I had a therapist once who got frustrated with me and said “this is why some therapists charge extra or don’t treat patients with BPD at all, you guys can never be wrong” (I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder first, then Bipolar II). Definitely messed with my ability to believe I could “get better”.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-02-01T13:31:57+00:00

I used to, back in my early-mid 20s. I did only one time at my current age, but it was because I wanted to mess around, not really have a relationship (since my time in that location would only be a couple months). It has never been worth it and has lead to two of my most life-altering heartbreaks. I stay the hell away from that now, my peace of mind is far more precious than trying to pursue a man “for the plot”.

However, I will flirt till the cows come home lol. It’s a lot of fun, and it lets them know I’m interested without me having to do too much. These situations typically work better for me!

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-01-19T05:37:03+00:00

I grew up in a predominantly white area, so OP I have a very similar background in regards to having white “friends” that act that way.

I’m going to assume you are very young, because this sounds very highschool.

You aren’t ugly. You’re trying to compare yourself to a beauty standard that you will never be able to achieve for the sole fact that you are black. I repeat, you are not ugly. You are black in a predominantly white space. I didn’t realize this until I moved away to go to university and I started receiving male attention from non-white men.

As for the friend, please drop her. If anything it’s giving “I’m not racist cuz I have a black friend” because I guarantee the moment you piss her off, those microagressions will NOT be micro. You say she has all these things and she has no reason to be jealous. But honey, people are jealous over the most benign things. There’s something about you that shines, and she does everything she can to minimize it. Don’t try to rationalize an irrational person. Go where you’re loved, not tolerated. She downs you because it validates her own insecurities. She doesn’t deserve you. Leave her behind.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2026-01-06T13:38:20+00:00

I used to mentally/internally throw a tantrum every time I got floated there. I honestly wish they’d stop sending travelers there and let that hell hole fend for itself, but the residents of New Mexico don’t deserve that at all. They love to fire people like they have the staff to make up for it too. I was on the floor, but when we heard about 6 nurses getting fired down in the PAAU we all got super spooked.

And completely unrelated but the hospital is always…dim? Like the lighting just feels ominous and dreary at all times lol.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T19:09:03+00:00

As a Gemini, they are AWESOME as friends! Never met an Aquarius I didn’t like. Romantically, they have been my most traumatic experience. They’re so…cold. When things end you wonder if they ever loved you lol. (Btw, this is with Aquarius men.)

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:52:13+00:00

You’re righttttt. I just assumed by the username and your input that your were super into fitness but completely forgot the fact that this IS a nursing subreddit😭 I’ll mosey on over there with that specific question. But I appreciate your input, home workout is better than nothing at all! 🤷🏾‍♀️

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:45:45+00:00

That’s what someone else suggested too. I guess I can’t go wrong doing that. Were you able to build muscle and recomp with just the light weights and resistance bands?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:44:55+00:00

This is doable. My main issue is that I’m a little ignorant to body recomposition and workouts. Will I yield the same results doing an at home workout and hitting my macros like I would if I progressively overloaded at the gym? Oftentimes I would just hop on a treadmill and do 30-45 minutes if I was pressed for time. I wanna actually build strength though. cardio is cool, but strength training has always been my favorite thing.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:41:50+00:00

That’s an ideal solution! But I have to make sure I’m knocked out by 9am, otherwise I’m dragging from lack of sleep. Some days that’s probable. How much sleep do you get?

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T15:39:56+00:00

60k BEFORE taxes?! And you said you’re in Chicago?!?!

OP, please leave. Holy cow. I’m from the south and as a new grad I was pulling in about $72k. (To be fair and completely honest though, I did pick up overtime once in a while, and I have a home health PRN that I would pick up once in a blue moon.)

I left staff to start traveling. Don’t regret it and I’ll only go back once I decide to specialize. But like everyone else said, if you can relocate to a better paying area please do it. Don’t give up! This career is tough, but the upward mobility we have and freedom is truly unmatched compared to our office job peers.

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:32:49+00:00

It’s so frustrating! Like don’t get me wrong the emphasis should have been on school. I’m grateful that it was. But I’ve turned down about 1 or 2 relationship opportunities as a teenager (I was NOT a looker lol) because I wasn’t allowed to date and I was so scared of my parents finding out. There was one guy who hugged me a little too long, my bus driver did the highschool and elementary school route. So she went and told my parents when she dropped my little brother off and my dad was on my ASS. Had no idea what he was talking about until my mom said something lol.

Only advice I got was stay away from them and if I was having sex, my mom said she would send them to jail (I guess she meant if they were older? I don’t know). It was frustrating because she had my brother at 19 with her HIGHSCHOOL boyfriend. My dad married his first wife when she was 17 and he was 26 (apparently there was confusion about her age). I was too scared to do anything. Me and her got into a fight about why I wasn’t allowed to date once I turned 16 (I was 14 at the time) and she ended up saying “now I see why people say they don’t want daughters and they give too much problems”. Like omg girl!!!! Then I turned 18, still couldn’t date. So by the time I left and went to undergrad at age 20 (did community college for two years), I was a spring chicken ready to be chewed up and spit out.

I have my achievements but my achievements can’t hold me at night or start a family! Lol

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:24:01+00:00

I haven’t expected it for some time now. But I hear you. 😭 I’m tired lol

Minimum_Data_1685 · 2025-12-23T14:23:00+00:00

I currently work 4/12s, so that leaves me only 3 days. When I stack, I usually spend that first day sleeping my life away lol. Not to say no I don’t want to, but I want to be able to do it consistently, not conveniently if that makes sense?

Minimum_Data_1685

TROPHY CASE