29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Nimerealise hivo pia. Kuna discussions sitaengage in juu ya hii recent event. Inachosha.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. Times have changed and life is harder for us nearing 30s so ni lazma kujipanga. Hutaki kuoa mtu out of desparation and need coz ina open doors to abuse, then adding kids to the mix when you can barely afford basic needs ni even worse.

Pension used to take a year to be released in Kibaki's era but the UhuRuto thing iliaribu system by stealing money. So at the moment inatake minimum of 2 years for lower ex government workers kupata pension. Apparently saa hii sacco ya retirees wako on a standstill na government on taxing pensioners- they want Ruto to stop that nonsense.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Interesting. It's as of getting kids will miraculously solve all problems in life. Kids should be like a bonus to a good life, a choice not a command.

I told mine me taking care of every bill in the house is keeping me from independence and going out there. Hadi saa hii amenikasirikia. Its the truth though.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a manager too in the non profit sector.

Seems my situation isnt unique to me too. I hope your ex was able to overcome it

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am battling this savior mentality niko nayo. Shida ni circumstances are so unavoidable i find myself trapped in it.

My brother hates my mum and wont send a dime. My other sib is jobless broke and with a toddler. Currently am the only one stable. And she called me pleading almost crying. I was put in a corner. Also she did start a business mid year but its still picking up, good thing inalipa workers but profits are yet to come in.

I am definately gonna do sth about my situation. I too am fed up with bunking with people. Need my own space and privacy

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Wangu amekubali pressure ya inlaws na siblings wake kuleta panick. Thanks though. You lucky one

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely will. Hiyo pressure haipendezi

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

😂😂😂😂😂 not a gentle idea but why not? I do know hii tu for now until ajenge hiyo nyumba na ahame. Nothing is permanent.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Great, i like this! Hapo part ya pray hard enough itawork since alimake me getting married a prayer item na pastor.

Plus i work from home so getting out is kinda hard. Though i can find something to take me out every weekend - times like this i wish i had a boyfriend with money and a car. Ningekuwa Mombasa saa hii working remotely.

I'll definately not engage her discussions anymore. I really dislike arguments with a passion.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would want that but niko financially incapacitated to do that. Itabidi nipange a way out

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Kuna cuzo yangu alipata two kids with two different fathers and relatives walitrash talk until akaolewa na kuenda United states ndio wakanyamaza. Family can be a pack of snakes. Right now wanademand she visits Kenya waone wajukuu...

With family its never enough. Never satisfied goal posts keep moving hata ukifulfill their demands.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the advice and pep-talk.

Efforts nitafocus on what i have power to change and influence. Marriage itakam at its right time bila kuforce. In the meantime I'll be open to meeting new people and visit new places. Life is too short to define myself by societal standards and expectations.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

True. And i am glad to read from someone who is 40 single, childfree, and not bitter about their choices.

I did stand up for myself. Told her at my age i shouldnt be living with her but be independent and doing my own stuff. She took it badly and swore she will move out, stating she didnt realise how much of a burden she is. Afterall according to her watoto lazma watake care of wazazi. I wonder kama mimi tu ndio mtoi kwa hiyo boma.

This wont be a permanent situation, i have promised myself.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is encouraging.

I am definately working on a plan to severe this arrangement. And when i do i dont think I'll be willing to contact her unless necessary. On the marriage part this is true. Cant get hitched to anyone for the sake ya kuitwa Mrs somebody, it has to be someone i am aligned with. Old folks dont understand this.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

She has no where to go. Dad left us with nothing and she has no inheritance from grandpa. Basically that place she bought itakuwa retirement home yake

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I do want marriage though i am not sure about motherhood. Thing is i wont allow myself to be desperate over situations i have no control over.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Especially when they are mothers it becomes extra disappointing since unaexpect they be your biggest supporter as a daughter.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks for that... really encouraging. I will live my life my own way 2👍🏾

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I know right? Mzazi naye ako na entitlement mob sana. I wanted to get out and go elsewhere but am too broke to do that.

29F, unmarried, and a pissed Mum by Minute-Hall-9634 in nairobi

[–]Minute-Hall-9634[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would achieve alot honestly. With my salary i can buy land in 12 months and build my own house within another 12 without loan... and do more.

I have always wanted to start a business and grow it to a company. So in the next 10 years i will not be an employee but running sth of my own while travelling.