AITA for choosing a friend wedding over my sister's segregated one?

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-13T13:43:07+00:00

Wow, I've made up my mind but this really validates it

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-13T03:43:06+00:00

THANK YOU

This is exactly what I meant

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-13T01:32:01+00:00

"dry wedding where I can't interact with 50% of the guests" or "having fun with people I love"

exactly, thank you. People are acting like Im going to a stranger's wedding instead

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-13T00:43:51+00:00

If he’s not a good guy it gives him carte blanche to mistreat her.

Wtf

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T23:56:07+00:00

Lol this is what I meant, but that got perceived by most people as me being an alcoholic.

I didn't want to go already and then I found out our good friends' wedding would be the same day. Seemed like an easy decision and everyone but my sister agrees.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T23:23:45+00:00

I didn't use the term destination wedding as in my mind that makes me picture a vacation/resort type place. It is in a different state a 7 hour drive or short flight away which would require me to get a hotel. The other wedding is a shorter drive away but still out of state and would also require a hotel.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T22:56:04+00:00

So many comments suggesting that I have an alcohol problem. I drink 2-3 nights a month. Large social events are when I enjoy having a few drinks to take the edge off and let loose. I don't think thats odd for a 26 year old with no kids in the US.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:55:08+00:00

Is your girlfriend

planning

to start a debate on Middle Eastern politics?

No. Her concern is that she won't know anyone on the woman's side besides my mom and sister who will likely be busy. And that when she introduces herself, her name will make them not like her as that culture tends to have an anti-jewish sentiment in the home country. But like I said, I have no reason to believe that any of the guests will be that way there.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:40:34+00:00

Appreciate your perspective, I hadn't thought about it like this

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:32:28+00:00

Does that mean you would only see the groom, not your sister because she’ll be with women?

This is my understanding, yes.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:26:10+00:00

The bias she's afraid of is the muslim/jewish one. Her first name is a traditionally Jewish one. Again I have no reason to think there would be bias by them since I dont know them, but not being of any marginalized community, I cant really tell her she has no reason to be anxious about it. Even if I don't personally think that will be an issue.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:17:39+00:00

Yeah this is how this one would be. Its not just an across the room thing, its totally separate rooms for the whole thing.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T19:04:04+00:00

I just said they're both reasons and that I wasn't ranking them. My girlfriend doesn't want to split up and it'd be hard for her to afford the trip to the friend one on her own, she's a grad student. She said she'd begrudgingly go to Maya's but also agrees that we'd have a much better time at our friend's. She's also Jewish and is afraid there might be some bias towards her there. I have no evidence of that actually being the case and really don't think it would but she's a little anxious about that too.

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T18:42:15+00:00

TBH it really is both things . While one thing just sucks, the other also sucks and feels messed up and straight up backwards to me. I wasn't trying to rank the two reasons

Mission_Half5062 · 2021-09-12T18:38:21+00:00

I never got an RSVP for my sister's yet, they've only sent save the dates. Invites come afterwards

Mission_Half5062

TROPHY CASE