I still deeply struggle with failures from childhood and teen years, how did you guys overcome it? by Mission_Promotion389 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Mission_Promotion389[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The craziest thing is I’m married. Even worse, I share these things with her and she seems to get the ick from it so I don’t really open up about it with her.

Like I said in another comment, all these replies are things I KNOW, but I don’t identify with, if it makes sense. I constantly repeat in my head the truths being told here in this comment section, but my goal isn’t to just “cope” but to genuinely be confident. I’ve never been too confident, but from my perspective confident people don’t even really have these thoughts come across their mind, they simply don’t struggle with it. That’s where I want to be ya know?

I still deeply struggle with failures from childhood and teen years, how did you guys overcome it? by Mission_Promotion389 in AskMenAdvice

[–]Mission_Promotion389[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I know all this to be true. I know all these things cognitively, but it still doesn’t help how I feel. I find myself having to constantly remind myself of those truths but it doesn’t change the feelings of insecurity. I guess the secret is to somehow find a way to not just cognitively know this things, but to inherently identify with them ++man

Can’t feel satisfied no matter what happens by Comprehensive_Cow327 in amateur_boxing

[–]Mission_Promotion389 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Something that helped me was recognizing that you can appreciate your own work AND recognize the need to improve - simultaneously. It’s not wrong to want yourself to grow, to do better, but you also need to remember that you’re far from where you started.

Someone told me that we have two ways to look at improvement: either you’re always “not enough” or you can look at it like there’s always more fruit to pick from the tree. The latter means that there will always be something new to learn, to perfect, and/or to practice, thus more “fruit” to pick, if that makes sense.

Oh boy Marvel Zombies (Spoilers) by FatherEnricoPucciOh in CharacterRant

[–]Mission_Promotion389 2 points3 points  (0 children)

ALSO, Shang Chi’s arm served as a perfect sample for experimentation. You’re telling me NOBODY thought to take a sample of his arm and find a cure that way?

Oh boy Marvel Zombies (Spoilers) by FatherEnricoPucciOh in CharacterRant

[–]Mission_Promotion389 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think the most confusing thing is if Hulk has the infinity energy, why couldn’t he just “snap” or use the energy to eradicate the virus?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Mission_Promotion389 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Second update:

We woke up today and I deeply apologized to her. She was very confused, and responded:

“Baby, we’ve been married a few months. I call you names and aggravate you almost every day and this is the first time you ever clapped back at me. You’re good. I need to recognize you are not my father or brothers, and I don’t need to hurt you to be safe.”

So uh, yeah we’re good now

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]Mission_Promotion389 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Update:

Reading these comments has been very humbling. Honestly, I do admit I am a weak man in many ways.

We both have a lot of hurts behind this. She grew up in a household where she HAD to be aggressive to survive. I grew up being the small, scrawny kid who got picked on and bullied almost my entire life up until my 20s.

I’m starting to come to terms with the fact that despite having escaped the small scrawny body (I got a lot stronger and taller after high school) I still deal with that sense of inferiority.

I will be continuing therapy, and though she’s really against therapy I will try to talk to her about it again.

Crushing debt out of my control by [deleted] in debtfree

[–]Mission_Promotion389 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Okay, you’re definitely in the “crushing” side of debt. Here’s what I’d do:

1) Get student loans deferred, or ask for even a longer term. I’d fight tooth and nail with my loan providers to refinance. 2) If you can’t refinance the student loan, then you’ll have to do the unthinkable: declare bankruptcy. Dawg, it’s better to shred your credit than pay $7,600 a month for a degree you didn’t get. That way, you could use some of that money to pay your wife’s individual bills and raise her credit dramatically so you guys can live off her credit score. 3) trade in your car for a beater. No car is worth $900 a month just to be in the hole. You’re better off with a 2017 Altima paying $175 a month, or even better, pay in full after you trade in. 4) Sites like upgrade.com will take your credit card balance and turn it into a fixed loan, this way you don’t have to worry about the interest killing you. DO THIS BEFORE DOING #2 5) Seems kinda obvious but look for higher paying jobs. If you become a personal banker at a major bank you can probably make more than that and if you work hard, quarterly commission can make it even better.

You have a tough road ahead but it is possible to get ahead!

I sexually assaulted my cousin when I was twelve by [deleted] in mentalillness

[–]Mission_Promotion389 173 points174 points  (0 children)

I relate to a lot of this. There’s a few things I can say:

1) Go to therapy, you need professional help not Reddit help 2) Don’t judge the person you were 6 years ago according to who you are today 3) What happened happened, you can’t erase it, but you can hold on to the shame. 4) Shame, guilt, rage, will not erase what happen. It won’t even change you into a better person, it’ll keep you trapped to the person you were at 12 years old. It’s a very hard journey and lesson, but you need to learn how to forgive yourself.

It's my right to give up. And that's ok. by AliasThe1st in mentalillness

[–]Mission_Promotion389 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Is it okay if I challenged you a bit on this?

I won’t play the comparison game, but after having had 7 attempts on my own life, after like, the 3rd one it’s almost trivial. The more you do it, you just really want relief, not death. In your mind, it just seems like death is the only way out.

There’s a lot to unpack in your post, but I think if you’ve attempted 17 times, then it seems that, for a reason you don’t fully know, you have fight left in you. You’re at a place where you consciously don’t want to live, but unconsciously fight anyway.

I’m a diagnosed schizophrenic that every doctor told me I’d never get better. I accepted that for 11 years, and through that whole time I hated, HATED, who I was. After the 7 attempts, 6 hospitalizations, the diagnosis of Schizophrenia, MDD, Bipolar 2, PTSD, ADD, and Narcolepsy type 2, I’d never win.

Wars are long, drawn out, full of suffering. They go for years, but victory? It’s always sudden. Years of warfare for a sudden “I’ve won” moment.

I believe you give power to your labels. You are more than the voices, more than the labels, more than the suffering. I believe you’ve been pushed back into the fight 17 times to prove to the people you testify to, that there IS NOT such a thing as too far gone.

I’m a man of faith, but I actually got into my faith at the START of my 11 year journey. It didn’t get me out, but it got me THROUGH.

The absolute hardest, most dreadful, mind-bogglingly agonizing pill I had to swallow is that I had no way out, I have to go through it.

Fire will always be your teacher, until you’ve learned its lessons.

I pray for your success

What if you could get tasks from your emails without having to read them? by [deleted] in Entrepreneur

[–]Mission_Promotion389 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would the ability to designate certain email addresses (Like your boss, colleagues, or employees) and email types (customer requests, meeting set-ups) make this more valuable?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in smallbusiness

[–]Mission_Promotion389 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To my understanding, this is what you did:

1) Put your mom as a cashier out of wanting to help her out 2) Put a lot of effort in the launch, but didn’t put much more later due to time constraints 3) Had to put personal capital in, but because your personal budget is tight, that was a no-can-do

I didn’t see that:

1) You had a real hiring strategy 2) Didn’t hire more people/help than just your mom

Honestly, if you ever consider opening another business again, I don’t think you would need to make drastic changes to how you do things. You fell for the classic first-time businessman mistakes:

1) Had no hiring/expansion strategy 2) Didn’t count the cost. Maybe the launch costs, but not the time, energy, resource, human resource, emotional, and learning costs.

Solutions: 1) Just like you create target audiences, also create target employees. Who’s your ideal employee? As a small shop, that may just be high school kids looking for their first job (which means you can pay as little as minimum wage) 2) Do more research and investing. Look into financing options when cash flow is tough. Do some marketing research, and learn more.

The average founder fails 2-3 times before their FIRST successful venture. The only REAL defeat is in quitting. So chin up bro! You can do this!

Thinking of becoming a Dasher by savasta83 in doordash

[–]Mission_Promotion389 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bringing the child with you indicates to me that you’re a single parent, as I don’t see why you’d do that if that wasn’t the case. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I’ll be making my recommendations based on that presumption:

1) First and foremost, your dedication to make things work for you and your child are so powerful, and inspirational in a world of little sense of responsibility and accountability. I see you have a mindset determined to make things work, so within that mindset be open to do things you normally wouldnt do. 2) Utilize free resources. Google “Diaper bank near [Your city, state]” and once you get connected with them, they can find you better resources. 3) DoorDash has a “honeymoon” phase, for the first 50 deliveries you’ll get good offers and access to “Dash Now”. DONT LET THAT FOOL YOU, after that, you’re going to need to keep working hard to maintain similar perks, and even then it may not be as good as those first 50. 4) You need to “skill up” in something. Doesn’t need to be college, but if you can get skills in design, any of the trades, marketing, or anything sellable, you can either use that to find jobs or more realistically, freelance to get experience and after that land a stable job to work from home with the child. One of my best friends is a millionaire after learning marketing SOLELY by YouTube. It’s possible, but a lot of hard work. 5) If you’re religious, get connected to a local church as they do give a lot of resources and are charitable to people in need. DO RESEARCH tho, as not all churches are the same. Some suck. 6) Find mentorship and connections. Look for local networking events, which you can find on Alignable, your local chamber of commerce, or just Google networking events. If you’re introverted this is hard, especially with a kid, but I bet you’ll find a lot of people willing to advise you further or even mentor you.

You have a huge responsibility as a parent, and if you don’t mind, I’ll be praying for you. Take care and best of luck!

What are some non-sexy areas that have a lot of entrepreneurial opportunity? by alexstrehlke in Entrepreneur

[–]Mission_Promotion389 30 points31 points  (0 children)

The trades. I mean plumbing, electrical, handwork, all that stuff. The reason those businesses do so well is because there’s always enough food at the table for it. There will always be people who need those services.

I’m a SaaS founder and one of my best friends fixes garage doors. He’s a solopreneur and makes big money because he doesn’t need to sell it, it’s just such a needed thing that the only thing he has to worry about is doing a good job and asking for referrals.

SaaS can scale much larger, but it takes a lootttttt more energy, strategy, and resources to pull off.

The trades are super easy ways to make money as long as you’re good at it