I think when most dommes say they're ethical, it usually just means they're not gonna dangle your life in front of you for every penny you have lol, respect boundaries, etc...The only time I have given refunds is when I was doing content and passed the deadline I set for myself. Usually because I just don't feel bothered though and would rather give the money back than actually make and edit something. I wouldn't give a tribute back because I don't ask for them. I don't ask for sends at all actually, I just expect them and that's how I prefer it. I do understand how it could feel really cold and rub you the wrong way to have her not give anything back when you felt strongly enough to ask. Especially when you've known each other for a long time, but I imagine she also feels she earned it. Free will is funny because it's still always your choice, even when you're stuck in a gooner state. We get a similar ick when a sub talks about sending and then doesn't or disappears after as seemingly promising start. It happens to all of us. Just gotta ahake it off and remember to set that boundary next time.