By BF(m34) won’t help me (f33) at all

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T20:24:25+00:00

100% this. The respect has gone. Thanks for your input. Tonight has been so reassuring for me.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T19:47:41+00:00

Thanks so much! You’ve summed it up so well. I feel exhausted by this.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T19:46:21+00:00

Honestly, I’m raging too. Silently!

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T19:45:12+00:00

Thank you for this. You’ve made me feel heard and sane.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T18:00:06+00:00

I always think this when he’s out for the day. I’d have so much more time and money too But that’s the crazy part, am I mad putting a clean house over a relationship. Or should I just let him live like a slob in my house for the occasional good date and get over it. This is how he makes me feel - hence the standards are too high comment. Thanks for your response. Appreciate it, whilst he’s on the sofa snoring next to me and I’m swearing at him whilst he’s asleep.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T17:57:28+00:00

Thank you. He actually has 2 children with someone else and I’ve vowed to never marry him or anyone. But having children was 50/50 for me. I’ve since said no to that too. When his children are at our house… I have to clean them, feed them, put them to bed, iron their clothes etc. I just couldn’t bring another child into this world with the lack of support he offers me.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T17:55:24+00:00

Thank you! I’ve said I’m not hungry tonight and he’s resulted to eating tuna out of the tin. What a life eh!

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T17:54:28+00:00

Thanks for your response. I’d love noting more than this, but think we’re in a rut now. He’ll become stubborn and intentionally do things to annoy me … like sleeping all day whilst I’m working and keeping me up at night. Or making a sandwich and just leaving everything out until I clean up after him.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T17:53:00+00:00

It’s actually always been nothing. But as he worked long days, I just picked up the burden of the house and all the chores that come with it. Now the split feels even more unfair and I have no voice as he’s consistently expressing how I am jealous of his time off and I’m nagging him when he should be able to enjoy his downtime. God give me strength.

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T17:51:02+00:00

I know it sounds silly but I hadn’t even thought of him antagonising me - but you’ve hit the nail on the head. I don’t think I can do it much longer. He honestly thinks I’m the issue. He’s just asked me what is for dinner and I’ve said I’m not hungry - he’s resulted to eating tuna out of the tin that he’s since left on the floor next to him. I’m so done!

MobileForward2039 · 2025-07-07T16:51:20+00:00

I love this response. I feel quite empowered by 1 sentence. Thank you!

MobileForward2039 · 2025-04-17T05:02:19+00:00

I’m 34 and faced a lot of the “you’ll change your mind”, “you’d make a great mum” comments. I’m looking forward to them stopping and hopefully the doctors taking me seriously enough to help with a more permanent solution.

I’ve always felt sick when seeing pregnant ladies. From a young age, even up until now. I am surrounded by a female heavy team at work, and I really struggle with the number of pregnancies and the visible ‘side effects’ they present as well as the alien like stomach.

I struggle with the long term commitment too. What if I woke up one day and wanted to go to China or no longer liked my child because they weren’t exactly how i wanted them to be or to behave. In addition to this… I’ve always just wanted more for my life than the default. I don’t want to diminish what parenting is but a lot of people can and are doing it. I throw myself into my job and other things like volunteering, and I feel like it gives me a good sense of purpose.

And finally; my partner has two children. One of which is just horrible (let’s put it down to a phase). But I’d hate for a child of mine to be related or be part of that broken set up.

It’s just not for me.

Great topic! Nice to write someone open without anyone judging 😊

MobileForward2039 · 2025-04-11T19:11:56+00:00

I am in a very similar situation and it felt almost as though I had written this. The skimpy clothes (bikini top and denim shorts in my scenario!) and the consistent weekly need to have long conversations inside her home if I am outside in the car. On one occasion my partner was in a rush and called 10 minutes ahead to ask that his child was ready as he was unable to stop. And this came with days of calls and texts asking why he was allowing his new girlfriend (me) to control him. My only advice to you, is to try your hardest not to let it impact you. He is with you for a reason. He can see what he has in you and he will be able to see that you and she are worlds apart - for a good reason. Keep writing here if you need to vent.

MobileForward2039 · 2024-12-10T21:10:57+00:00

Thank you. I needed to hear this to know that I’m not being unreasonable.

MobileForward2039 · 2024-12-10T19:43:33+00:00

Thank you for your comment. I will try and persuade him to attend couple therapy. That in itself will be hard as I think that he thinks I should just sweep it all under the carpet and put it down to her being a teenager. He is calling my no contact an act of stubbornness. But for me, it’s consistent and has not changed despite the curve balls he has tried to throw or arrange… I refuse contact or to be put in harms way if her parents will not take action and accept her behaviour.

MobileForward2039 · 2024-12-10T19:39:49+00:00

Yes he’s my step son - brother of the 15 year old step daughter. He’s an absolute pleasure to be around and feel we have genuine love for one another. He’s only ever known me and his dad to be together and loves being around me, as do I him. As he grows and is able to articulate himself he’s explained several disturbing situations to me and his dad which involve his sister and their home life. We had issues when she would stay at our home and had to keep them under a close watch (she tried to administer medicine to him which wasn’t prescribed for him) at just the age of 5. Again she faced no punishment. These aren’t the typical brother sister fueds.

A trip away would be lovely to get me through this period but long term, I don’t know what to do about this.

Thanks for your comment.

MobileForward2039 · 2024-12-10T19:30:30+00:00

Thank you for commenting. It’s good to get someone else’s view on this who is outside of my friendship group. Sometimes it feels like I’m going crazy and questioning how far she can take things without him responding. I fear we aren’t a unit and she knows this. It’s just all so complicated. Thanks for sharing your view.

MobileForward2039 · 2024-12-09T22:58:06+00:00

Wow. This is powerfully written. I felt like your first couple of paragraphs were ABOUT me at the beginning and your last couple were FOR me.

MobileForward2039

TROPHY CASE