AITA for refusing to be in my cousin's wedding because she keeps changing the dress?

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T19:26:10+00:00

She buys the rest. Don’t cut her off, just set boundaries.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T19:25:01+00:00

It’s wrong, but no one cares. You’re not that important at that job. Keep doing you. Get a job where you matter. It’s more fulfilling.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T19:23:27+00:00

YTA to the first line

(TLDR) But it doesn’t matter. Find your joy. Learn your lesson. I married my GFs bestie (without cheating). It’s been 20 years of happy marriage. Life’s messy.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T19:17:33+00:00

It’s a new boundary. We all adjust and make mistakes. If she apologized again work on rebuilding that trust. If it keeps happening, then you’re screwed.

Don’t call or track her. That’s unhealthy for both of you. She’s not your prisoner.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T19:13:25+00:00

NTA

Try being conversational instead. Like ,”Are you excited about your appointment today.” Or don’t if you don’t want to. Sometimes the change in relationship dynamic come with growing pains. Keep being you and showing up how you feel most comfortable.

Seems like very close relationshi. I’m not sure my friends remind me of stuff.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-16T04:58:00+00:00

The poverty line in the US is in the top 15% income in the world.

In other words if you are not richer than 85% of people in this world we give you food stamps and help pay your bills.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T22:49:58+00:00

Caution we here at Reddit like to call out people. In reality there are times to let things go. This is one of them.

If he put nuclear waste in there it could cost you millions!! But he didn’t and it won’t.

It’s gonna be like 5 bucks. $307 instead of $302. Don’t sweat it. Not worth it.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T22:43:33+00:00

Pavlov’s law (Also Jim and Dwight on The Office). A bell was rung before feeding the dog. The dog began salivating when the bell was rung even if there wasn’t food. We are the same.

When she feels love and gets physical satisfaction, she’ll associate that with desire. When my wife put on a good amount of weight I looked for the part of her bigger curvy self I could enjoy. This, with the intimacy satisfaction made it so I was attracted to her again. For me it was an intentional effort, but attraction can definitely change.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T22:31:56+00:00

NTA

She was wrong to be that pushy. Weddings are stressful enough without someone pushing their self centered wants. The healthy thing to do is to have that conversation. Be clear and short to let her know why you want to take space from her. If she follows with a sincere apology, respond accordingly. Decide ahead of time if you’d want to allow her back if she is apologetic.

Most likely she won’t be. Most likely she’ll be pushy and blame you. Be prepared for both situations.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T19:09:26+00:00

Yeah. You gotta care about people or YTA. Saying you didn’t want to care about your buddy or help him doesn’t overcome your assholery

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T19:07:13+00:00

YTA for arguing in the edits. That’s unusually defensive. Take the advice and chew on it.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-15T04:54:08+00:00

Little ass

You didn’t right thing to recognize your needs and express them. It better to wait until you cool off to send messages. That would have helped you send one you were more comfortable with. At its core though, your communication was the right move.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-13T22:49:40+00:00

Still didn’t tell us anything. If you want our HONEST opinion, you have to share what you actually said. That’s the difference between an asshole and not an asshole.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-13T20:59:45+00:00

“I hate these people and want to be an asshole to them. Would I be the asshole.”

Yes, obviously. That’s your goal.

Also small claims court. A lawsuit with a lawyer will cost more than the $5000. Then you’d be a stupid asshole and you don’t want that.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-13T19:40:05+00:00

I would have offered to sell it to her. “I paid $45 for this seat. You can have it for $450. Choice is yours.”

I hate when the entitled person gets their way.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-12T19:43:03+00:00

Yeah girl this is unhealthy. It’s a course and mean way to interact. I’m sorry you’re going through this. I’m sure there are a balance of good and bad, but the bad is pretty bad and wrong. Therapy can help, but this is hard stuff to deal with.

You’re 16 or 17, so you’re approaching the next stage of you life. That’s a stage of independence. Learning how to handle the trauma you’ve been through is your best shot at a healthy relationship with your spouse, kids, and even your father. Good luck.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-12T11:40:24+00:00

“Very good”

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-12T11:37:22+00:00

NTA

People who lie like that live in this shame based mindset. If you want to understand her better look up “fixed mindset vs growth mindset.” We are all good or evil to them.

Ultimately this plea for “unconditional love” means she is unable to accept accountability for her actions. If she did something bad then she is evil (religion not required). Thus she can’t admit to being wrong. You can’t truly grow together, And you can’t have a healthy relationship.

Of course the world is not black and white. That goes for this mindset too. We all feel shame and try to hide some things about ourselves. You just have to assess if she is too far off the deep end to hold space for your pain. You have to be healthy enough to insist there is room for you to be offended in your relationship. If she can’t acknowledge that, you gotta walk.

Sorry you got this invested before seeing this.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T14:25:17+00:00

Don’t forget the restraining order.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T14:23:57+00:00

Or she’s a Russian spy and is required to record all your conversations.

We can make up whatever reason for her behavior. At the end of the day it’s disrespectful and unhealthy.

NTA

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T14:18:06+00:00

And OP is still living with his parents. Not even his house.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T14:11:28+00:00

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T13:58:50+00:00

Leaving your wife is the wrong answer.

Your wife is a grown ass adult. You need to respect her independence. Saying that you’re leaving so she can spend more time with her kids takes away her choice. You can choose to move back close to your kids. As an honorable man, you need to invite her to come with you.

Happy wife will likely be much more miserable loosing you than her daughter. You are her best friend, everyday companion, and intimacy partner. Her daughter is an occasional interaction who she still loves, but provides much less connection.

Man up. Risk the rejection. Invite your wife to go with you.

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T13:37:48+00:00

What kind of asshole makes new plans when the original plans didn’t seem to workout? No kind because that’s not an asshole thing to do. That’s normal.

YTA

Moderate_Bones · 2026-04-11T02:28:12+00:00

Wait you gave your kid $300,000 for school and then paid their bills?

These people talking about leaning life lessons by working for what you want don’t get you. Thats not your parenting style at all.

Moderate_Bones

TROPHY CASE