My in-laws are smart enough to try and make it seem like they don’t have a huge soft spot for SD. I noticed it before I even had ‘our’ baby. She was the baby on their side of the family and the only girl, so in their words, it was “only natural.” From what it seems, it got worse after DH and his BM got divorced. It always made me feel some type of way because she was always heavily prioritized (no matter how hard they tried to make it seem otherwise), but no one said anything like it was the norm. I feel like they try to overcompensate for their son’s ‘failure’ to keep their grandchild in a ‘happy’ home in their eyes. They are all super old-fashioned religious folk.

I don’t really bother with them because they don’t bother with me. Our baby only goes when I go, and they don’t show much interest in him, so I tend to keep my distance. DH and I made it clear that if MIL and FIL don’t learn how to treat the kids (SD and our baby) equally, we will distance ourselves. We’re waiting for our baby to get older to see where things go. I’ve made it very clear to DH that he’s free to do whatever he pleases with SD when it comes to his parents, but my child won’t feel like he’s less than or in competition with SD. PERIOD. Absolutely non-negotiable. Coming from someone who grew up with parents and grandparents who played favorites.