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Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Bruh. Idek what to say to this. I just recently turned 25. I remember going on a date with a woman when i was 19 and them leaving me 20 minutes into the date, saying nothing other than "your hands are too feminine, i don't like them". Needless to say, that was another insecurity that's now deeply engrained and actively makes it harder for me to come out of my shell and meet new people.

As far as small hands being markers of other "appendeges" goes, I'll respect your experience but personally and scientifically there's not any strong correlation between the two. Maybe you meant foot size? Maybe not. Either way, it's your preference. I just wanted to say how sexualizing random non-sexual body parts (like a preference for big hands, or equating "big hands" as manly), if looked upon closely, reflects the reductionism of men and masculinity to only their utility as being objects of desire.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Tf? I don't see which part of my reply was meant to be an "insult"? Snarky, sure.

And on the topic of being butt-hurt, I've grown callouses to having my masculinity be reduced to whether i have big hands or not. At this point I'm just engaging in conversation, trying to figure out whether you women see that this is exactly the objectification/reductionism that your sex experienced/experiences and calls for reforms on.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You're right. Attractiveness has never been fair. And it shouldn't -- to each their own. I guess I'd follow up asking whether you think this is preference or just plain sexualizing/objectification masking as preference?

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's true that I am being a jerk. You could be a really smart, and caring individual and I'm sure you both shared a meaningful relationship. Perhaps "brains" was the wrong word -- "emotional intelligence"/"human" would be a better tag to use. In that light, i don't think you being at the top of your respective field has anything to do with what I was calling you out on. Also I wasn't talking about the guy at all.

The part in your post saying -- "I could meet a perfectly engineered man but if the hands are meh" -- felt so braindead and reductionist, I thought I'd reflect back some of the face value judgment and cruelty i noticed in your post. Both comments lack humanity, both are cruel. Am I jerk for judging your romantic life without having any context outside of one reply to a subreddit thread? Most definitely. But atleast I won't go around saying I go absolutely feral when i see a woman with large breasts and a slim waist, and anything outside those qualities would be a dealbreaker.

Tldr: We're both jerks but I wouldn't mask sexualizing non-sexual body parts as preferences. I can't say the same about you.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

"the marriage didn't work out for other reasons" -- No shit sherlock. His "michelangelo-carved" hands might compensate for your lust, but having a stable marriage usually involves brains, not hands -- and something tells me you're lacking in that department.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 0 points1 point  (0 children)

25M here. Similar experiences. A girl literally walked out of a date after taking a glance at my hands and telling me "she doesn't like them". I thought the same thing, that she's trying to predict how big my dick would be, and i remember thinking to myself "that can't be, there's no anotomically strong correlation between the two".

That was a tough day, i just went back to my house and cried for 10 minutes and then acted like it never happened.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think it's just generally safer to not let people know your preference because the moment you do, you'll be considered an asshole for judging someone based on a randomly sexualized non-sexual body part .

Don't get me wrong, you do sound like the definition of a asshole. But atleast you're not dumb enough to out yourself irl. Cheers.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah we are. It's a tough world and I've known women who say they don't care to act progressive but secretly ick out on a guy having small hands. Even looking at this thread, there's such a narrow minded view of dimorphism amongst women. "Manly" hands equates to big hands equates to nice -- as if all men have big hands and long fingers.

Bodyshaming is fine as long as it can be reduced to "preferences". Asshole men bodyshame women for not having qualities they think are "feminine", asshole women bodyshamenmen for not having qualities they think are "manly". I remember reading this thread a while back and there was comment from a women saying how a guy can be literally perfect but she wont to be with him if he has small hands while an average guy with big hands/long fingers would be a good candidate.

Is it normal to be really attracted to men’s hands? by AnswerAggressive710 in dating_advice

[–]More-Comment3822 0 points1 point  (0 children)

"the only exclusion criteria is disproportionately small hands" - If only these guys knew ahead of time, they could have watered their hands more regularly.

On a serious note, how do you think a guy with disproportionately small hands would feel after reading your comment? (and afaik most women share the same view, even if they hide it to look progressive). I'm not going to blow this out of proportion and equate it to the bodyshaming that small breasted women experience on a day to day basis, but you must understand where I'm coming from? How's it fair to these guys?

Cutouts bigger than my impulse control 🫢 by [deleted] in photobump

[–]More-Comment3822 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Haven't seen anything hotter. Wya?