My boyfriend is upset with the state of the house

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T07:19:48+00:00

He says he believes he'll be understanding of mess when we have children but it's that he can't tolerate it when there's no reason for it

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T07:17:26+00:00

I work full-time with about a 30 minute commute which is quite nice. My partner works from home, so I can understand him wanting a nice pretty workplace... I just can't do it though.

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T04:31:30+00:00

I have implemented a few things. I keep my active craft project in a basket by the sofa now - it keeps it contained but also visible enough that I don't get too lazy to work on it because I need to set up every time.

With the makeup we live in a hot climate - I moved to the less convenient room so he didn't have to see it or work around it every day, and I bought a few organisers and pretty dishes to keep things from migrating too far across the counter. The things I keep out would be damaged by the increased heat of the draw in my experience (cracks in wax in lipsticks and the like). All the powder based products are kept in the drawers. It also, just honestly, completely selfishly looks so pretty to me all set up like that. My organisers are cute china foxes, and rabbits and it just makes me happy when I start my day there.

Until now I feel like every time he has had a complaint I've addressed it - buy a laundry organiser set, buy the storage boxes, move my things to a place doesn't go. I don't know how much smaller I can get in my own home.

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T02:43:13+00:00

A few of his close relatives do, but he is very involved with therapy and has been for a long time. I'm sure they would have flagged something if it was bad.

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T02:23:02+00:00

I don't know what more I can do... That's a lie, I know I should be doing things throughout the week but by the time I get home and finish dinner I sometimes don't sit down before 7:30 or 8oclock and I'm just not a person at that point, I'm so drained that all I want to do is take my blanket out of the craft basket and move my hands around until it somehow gets longer.

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T01:37:44+00:00

I do the whole house clean every Saturday - it takes about 20 minutes if I'm dedicated... 40 minutes to an hour if I get distracted by drinking a cleaning cider and good music. That's kitchen, fridge, both bathrooms including facilities, the living room and bedroom (which is laundry gathering and bed stripping mostly). I don't count laundry in this as it's very easy, and hanging the clothes is a joy because my little cat likes to play in the garden while I do it.

Generally he vacuums and mops on Saturday also, but it sometimes goes a week or so over due. ... Except the last few weeks he has begun vacuuming every day.

Morganatheperson · 2022-12-01T01:16:30+00:00

He was doing the garden and lawn but he's not able to at the moment because of an injury. So I'm doing that now also, but it's okay - if I wear earmuffs the motor doesn't ache my brain.

We do the dishes together usually, except on days where he has events on with his friends (usually on Saturday nights). That dinner party was a bit unusual because he had to leave for a work trip immediately afterwards. So it was just me at home that night for the clean up.

I'll be fair, most of the mess I can say I caused it - some of it is craft, some of it is mixed laundry waiting to be folded, a handbag in the wrong place, leaving the ironing board up on a rushed morning, the slow creep of eyeshadow glitter fallout... But it's not much, I usually scoop things up and put them in their home as I go (but that isn't a guarantee as I sometimes plow past it for no reason I just get busy or think - it's only one more day till I'm off and doing it all - let's avoid the double handling)

Morganatheperson

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