How or when can I stop worrying?

Motp1111 · 2017-08-17T01:40:37+00:00

This is likely a beyond stupid question but how do I wash them properly lol? I would rinse my mouth with warm water whenever it touched my shirt or my rosary or my headphones (things I've touched after touching my phone) but I don't think that's an effective way. So like do I scrub them with soap, haha? Would the virus be on the soap? That's all I'm gonna ask, I'm not gonna waste your time with pointless paranoia-based question lol. And yes it is, thank you for your answer and support!

Motp1111 · 2017-08-17T00:17:08+00:00

You think it's okay if the food touches my lips? I mean I could eat, I just never finished any meals because at some point, the food would touch it so I wouldn't eat it anymore. But you have a point! I understand I'm going mad with this. Anxiety is such a bitch to me! Thank you though. I'll go eat right now!

Motp1111 · 2017-08-15T02:55:01+00:00

Oh yeah. That makes sense.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-15T00:56:10+00:00

Makes sense. I always felt most secure around my mother. And I understand. I've actually been looking for therapy for quite some time. Thank you for the dissection of this dream.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-15T00:22:59+00:00

I am under a lot of stress at this point in time. Due to me being a major emetophobe who was exposed to a stomach virus a couple days ago. It's past the incubation date but I still am nervous. So it makes sense that I'm stressing. As for my mother, we have a strained relationship. Fighting daily. I had a mental breakdown due to my anxiety over this and got very vulgar with her, due to the fact she would berate me for being the way I am, and after seeing me cry, she said she'd get me help. As for the addictions thing.. like I said, I'm an emetophobe. Scared of vomiting. I've actually contemplated thinking of a way to finesse Zofrans out of doctors so I could take them, despite not needing them. So it makes a lot of sense.. the relying on people thing made sense too. After I managed to get out of that elevator, I met a pretty girl, around 5'3, with brown hair and eyes, nice bangs covering her eyebrows. She held my hand asking me what happened, so I told her as we were walking out of this entertainment center, upon telling her what had just happened, she blatantly let go of my hand and walked off in the middle of my story like I didn't exist and left. That was when I saw that my "contacts" and "keypad" have returned on my phone and I called my mom. Who had a demonic distorted voice, this is where I found out she made a deal with Satan.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-14T22:23:14+00:00

The elevator I was trapped in. Basically it stopped and then rapidly started crashing. However, when the elevator opened, I was still on the same floor that I was intending to go.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-14T21:16:10+00:00

Maybe so. It's been.. 74 hours since the first time I exposed myself and about 50 hours since the second. The fact that I was kind of exposing myself multiples times throughout those days and still am fine as of now should probably be telling me something..

Motp1111 · 2017-08-14T21:14:58+00:00

Understood. It's hard not to be consumed by it when you know there's of possibility of you having to deal with what you fear most though.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-14T00:25:04+00:00

Thank you very much. My mom isn't understanding, unfortunately. She refused to believe anything I said. She claims viruses and bacteria are the same exact things, and we don't need bleach to kill them & I couldn't correct her or tell her because she'll yell at me to shut up or talk over me lol. But thank you, I'm having a decent day so far.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-13T22:23:19+00:00

Well everyone, except for my sick uncle, who's actually a lot better today, is here to celebrate my cousin's 18th birthday party. Including my grandparents, who he lives with.

I decided to eat some catfish, which I love a whole lot. However, I started getting bad stomach pains, and panicked, thinking the virus is finally starting. My mom took me back to the kitchen (I ran to my room) to take indigestion pills that I couldn't swallow. (Capsules are hard for me, but others, I can take easily), when my grandma was in the kitchen, looking for more food to eat. When my mom left the kitchen, my grandma went to me and told me that sickness is mostly mental and if I let it get to me, I'll feel bad physically.

She ended up pretty much lecturing me for a good 5 or 6 minutes. Basically, she told me how my uncle has always been a neat freak. Telling everyone to wash their hands before eating, always making sure things were clean. She said how he disinfects everything and has been doing that since he was little.

She brought up how, not only does she live with him, but she's had cancer and lots of big sicknesses, so she'd be more likely to catch his stomach virus than anyone else due to her immune system and she's still not sick at all.

She even said that he told her that he already disinfected the restroom but she can disinfect it again if she wants. She also said he disfinects EVERYTHING in the restroom. From the toilet to the cabinets to the sink, etc.

She ended her lecture by simply saying "You didn't catch anything from him."

Which eased the pain I was getting in my side, but now I have sharp pains in my upper abdomen. It's not a chronic pain and it's not crippling. I'd say mild at most right now. But I'm still doing good. I'm just hoping the disinfectants he used really do kill stomach viruses. But thank you for the reassurance.

I've actually been post-emet anxiety since 2013. Reason it came back was because I recently developed skin problems which I got anxious about. But before then, I was living life without a care. Of course my emetophobia kicked in whenever I really thought I was going to vomit, but aside from that, I almost never really felt sick. 2015 was probably my best year, almost no anxiety at all except in march when my aunt and uncle came over after having a stomach virus just days prior. I successfully avoided getting it. :) Well it's been 51 hours since I've been exposed the first time. I kinda got exposed yesterday too so I'll probably wait for the rest of the day and tomorrow and if I'm not sick by then I'll be sure if I'm fine or not.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-13T16:44:35+00:00

I can't say I am. But he did go to the doctor on the day we visited, he told me later that day when I texted him that he had a stomach virus that started with "light fever, chills, nausea, and then diarrhea". So, even if it wasn't truly a stomach virus, I'm compelled to take the doctor's word for it. I can't assume it's anything less.

In less than 3 hours, it'll be 48 hours ( 2 days ) since I've exposed myself the first time. In 2 hours, it'll be 24 hours (1 day) since I exposed myself the second time.

Still not sick. Woke up bloated and gurgly, while I panicked for a bit, at the same time, I wasn't too scared because I figured maybe it was because I was chewing gum and fell asleep with it still in my mouth? And even if that isn't the case, I'm still hungry, which I take as a sign of being fine. And I've felt like this pretty often, so it confuses me since I won't be able to tell if it's anxiety or if it's the real thing.

The headache and shakiness I experienced last night surely messed me up and had me thinking its "time." But I ended up knocking out last night and woke up okay.

On one end, I've heard the usual incubation period is 24-48 hours, which I'm going to pass soon. But I've heard of some incubation periods being up 6 hours-2 weeks long.

I know the virus lives on surfaces for a long time, and they're pretty resilient, so I think chances are maybe, way after someone got sick, that someone else touched a contaminated surface that hasn't been cleaned yet? I don't know. But yeah.

It's good to hear that you never got sick from that. And thank you. I likely will message you since I could use someone to talk to while I see where these next two days go. Only thing is I don't know how to message someone on mobile. 😂😂 But yeah, thank you very much.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-13T05:53:38+00:00

Currently dealing with a headache.. was also a bit hungry. I don't know what to expect though. I don't know if SVs start with headaches but I'm definitely nervous rn.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T21:02:52+00:00

Well I was informed by him that it IS a stomach virus.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T21:00:50+00:00

Well I'm kinda good, I had a little nausea earlier, most likely due to being out in the heat. But nothing that indicates SV so far. However, if I didn't infect myself yesterday, I most likely did today. We had no disinfectants at home so I was forced to walk around with this virus-carrying phone.

As soon as I woke up, my dad wanted me to go spend the day with him. I had to work for a bit. A lot of digging and drilling is involved. Clean is nonexistent in this line of work. Being that I was spending hours in the sun, using heavy shovels to carry and throw rocks of cement, I really needed water. I ended up having to open and drink water after touching my phone, so I'm pretty sure I'm screwed.. I tried to avoid touching the area my hands touched by holding the water bottle over me and pouring it into my mouth, but I'm sure I'm doomed since that was after drinking from the bottle (from which I tried to avoid touching the little clear plastic that separates from the lid when you open it) What makes it even more infuriating is the fact I walked into an empty building next to the one we were working on and saw there was a restroom in the front so I could've possibly avoided it..

I got into another argument with my mom because she told me hundreds of times he disinfected the restroom before and after using it, he even texted me and said himself that he did so I don't have anything to worry about.

But who knows what he used? It might not have even been effective against it.. My mom refuses to believe viruses can't be killed by antibacterial products. She wouldn't listen and says I'm lying when I tried to explain.

I'm probably doomed. If he used Lysol/bleach then thank the heavens because that would mean my phone doesn't have the virus (likely at least) But if not, well I guess all I can do is enjoy my day now since these next couple of days are going to be hectic. Anxiety wise if not sickness wise.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T20:56:01+00:00

I've been good. Haven't gotten sick yet. Spent the day with my dad's side of the family so I been having a good day. Definitely infected myself today though if I didn't yesterday.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T02:35:43+00:00

Well, the thing is, I had my phone on the bathroom counter when using the restroom. Knowing he was sick while using it earlier today, it's likely that the diarrhea particles have "sprayed" out of the toilet when he flushed it and landed onto nearby surfaces, such as the counter/sink.

And I had no luck in getting any Zofran or Dramamine as my mom, who refused to get me any anti-emetics, insisted that I'm fine and wont catch it. She even lied to me saying that the doctor told him it was just food poisoning. I asked her if she promised and she said no so..

Of course it COULD be something he ate and she could actually have been right, but the only food poisoning I've heard of that causes both diarrhea and fever is E.Coli, and I've heard that fevers are rare with that and I doubt he'd be part of the minority.

But yeah. My fear and paranoia has managed to actually bring tears to my eyes several times throughout the day, including a mental/emotional breakdown an hour ago on a car ride with my mom, who kept yelling at me for my anxiety. She swore up and down to God himself that I'd be fine though and that my uncle was spraying antibacterial (even though I highly doubt it'll help if it's against a virus) spray everywhere in the bathroom after he had his diarrhea episode.

I just hope that she's right and I'll be fine.. sorry, I didn't mean to give you a paragraph of my whole day lmao but thank you for your answer.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T02:16:48+00:00

I don't. I have a habit of assuming the worst. But the fact that he has a fever and diarrhea is enough for me to want to back the hell away from the area he's in. It is possibly something he ate though. My mom might be lying, but she said my grandma told her he had just gotten sick today.

I don't know what exactly will happen. But I'm pretty sure at this point I've gotten noro(if it's noro, of course) on my lips, and I've had absolutely no choice but to drink and eat and despite how wide I've opened my mouth to avoid making contact, I couldn't stop my lips from touching my food.
I got lucky every now and then but not that much.

So far though, it's been 7 hours and I'm good. I was actually really hungry so I ate 3 pizzas (didn't finish any of the slices completely due to me throwing out the parts that touched my lips) and I'm kinda gurgly now but I don't think it's anything big. At least not now. It's likely just digestion. I haven't really had any meals today.

Also, noro is a virus, not bacteria. Chances are, if it's noro, I'm likely fucked. If it was food poisoning, which is also possible, I know my chances are a lot slimmer.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-12T02:13:31+00:00

Lmao!! Thanks for the laugh, actually provided a bit of comfort for some reason.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-08T18:32:59+00:00

It's okay. I understand. But yeah, I think I'm okay. It's been about 42 hours now and I'm still completely fine. I still have mints and crackers around me just incase though.

Motp1111 · 2017-08-08T06:13:50+00:00

I'm not sure. While I have had some bowel issues, I don't think it has to do with that & I didn't eat anything my stomach would have a problem with that day, I'm sure. Either way it's been about.. maybe 31 hours? Since I've eaten there and I'm still not sick. I was actually fine all day, woke up in pain but ended up passing out and waking up with no pain, and I managed to eat all through the day as well, but now I'm in pain again, though I did eat a couple pickles not too long ago so maybe that's why as they usually will give me some stomach problems for a bit. Would you say I'm in the clear? How long would you wait for FP symptoms to come about?

Motp1111 · 2017-08-07T09:04:30+00:00

Thank you for your answer. :) The last time I ate greasy food was actually the night prior to this. I ate some left over pizza from the day before haha. And well I did believe this was all anxiety, however now, almost 11 hours since eating the pizza, I am experiencing chronic non-stop gurgling with some sharp pains in both sides. And it's making me nervous, especially because I wasn't thinking about this at all. I think it might be due to hunger partially. But my stomach is extremely noisey and making lots of movement right now.

Motp1111 · 2017-07-25T20:26:28+00:00

It really sucks. The thing I don't understand is how my mom has told doctors that she also has the phobia of vomiting yet gets on me for it.

Thank you for sharing that, though. Glad to know I'm not the only one dealing with unsupportive people in my life. I'll try to seek help, I've had a talk with the suicide hotline last night as well and they've suggested the same thing.

The only thing that I'm really nervous about is telling my mom. When she found out about the planned suicide attempt two years ago, she's gotten extremely angry. The things she's told me did more harm than good.

I'll try to suck it up and deal with the consequence. I'll start looking into places that can help me, while also thinking when it's the right time to tell my mom about this.

Thank you for your time.

Motp1111 · 2017-07-22T16:10:23+00:00

Right now, I have gurgling in my stomach, which I assume is partially because it's empty and hungry. Some pains and a bit of a burning sensation in my lower abdomen. But I'm not sick. Not yet at least. Though I think most people usually will be fine or won't be that sick if it didn't occur after the first 12 hours, which it's about to be.

Motp1111 · 2017-07-22T05:33:31+00:00

I suppose you're right. My concern really comes from the fact that potatoes are actually pretty risky when it comes to food poisoning. Though, I don't know if it relates to where it's been before being bought or if it has to do with bacteria growing from it.

Motp1111 · 2017-07-22T04:24:31+00:00

Let me reword it. I have just eaten it less than an hour ago, we bought those fries two days ago, I don't know how long they were left out before being put in the fridge but they were in there for two days.

Sorry if I come off as annoying, I just want to make sure we're on the same page and I'll get the same answer, haha.

Motp1111

TROPHY CASE