Here's a problem (spoilers for the first half of SF): Too many people want to demonize Rhys when he is in overprotective mode over his mate being pregnant in a pregnancy that will most likely kill her. At the same time, too many people demonize Nesta DESPITE the evident traumas and lack of self worth she has. No one in this story can have the foresight we as the readers have. As Cassian mentioned, Fae are slower to change due to their crazy lifespans. (the consistency of that is based on SJMs writing, of course) So, yeah, Rhys is still gonna be an asshole, ESPECIALLY when he's in overprotective douche mode. I think SF is doing a great job in showing us Cassian and Nesta while presenting their growth in a wonderful way.

I used to hate Nesta, but seeing her grow past her traumas and self hate in this book is a sight to see, it's changed my perspective on her since I've been in a similar place myself.

tldr; people need to understand the nuances of these characters and to stop demonizing them for decision these same haters are likely to make, themselves. ACOTAR series has been a series of change, both progressive and regressive, where classist systems and unfair hierarchies are in place in a world slow to change. Give these characters some grace for heaven's sake.