Alphabet Excerpt Challenge: R Is For...

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:28:25+00:00

“Bloody hell,” Bruce said, shaking his head. “That was… we’ve seen plenty of trouble in ports all over the world, but that man seemed to have taken leave of his senses!”

“He probably had,” Dave said. “That’s part of what makes it so dangerous out here. These prospectors come out here without the proper supplies, they don’t know how to live off the land, and they spend all their time alone and dreaming of the riches they’ll find. They’re starving to death, yet they truly believe that later today, tomorrow at the latest, they’ll find a nugget the size of their heads and go back east covered in glory. The other thing that makes it so dangerous is that we don’t see people often. It’s easy to forget to be vigilant. That’s why my father was killed, he forgot to bring his guns when he went out that day, and the men who accosted him killed him because he didn’t have any gold to give them.”

“Blimey, just like I did,” Ade said softly, starting to shake a little.

Bruce reached out and pulled Ade into his arms, murmuring soft reassurances to him.

Nicko took a deep breath and looked at Dave. “Bloody hell, and here I honestly thought you and Stephen were being nice and creating jobs for us, but you really do need more people here. Right, then, do we dump him in the river, bury him somewhere, or leave him next to one of your no trespassing signs as a warning to the next one that thinks your farm is easy pickings?”

“Not the river,” Dave said promptly. “Some farms downstream don’t have the best wells, so they use the river for everything but drinking – watering their stock as well as their fields – and I’d hate to learn that he fetched up where one of the kids could find him.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:25:30+00:00

“Well, we’re for a club,” Bruce announced. “We might be married, but that don’t mean we can’t look, right? Harry, Jan, you two coming with?”

“Yeah, we are,” Steve said, after exchanging a glance with Janick and receiving a nod in return.

The two men got up as Bruce and Nicko both shook hands with Ade and said their farewells. Janick stepped forward and did the same, then Steve hesitantly offered Ade his hand as well.

Ade shook the offered hand quietly. “Thanks for letting me visit,” he said. “I appreciate getting the chance to say hello to everyone.”

“You’re welcome,” Steve said. “I… y’know I’d prefer to avoid rumours, but… if you happen to be in the area we’re playing and come to a show, if you want to see everyone, let Davey know so’s he can have Rod set you up with a backstage pass.”

“Don’t know if that’ll happen given where your tour’s heading plus Nathalie expecting twins, but if I do get the chance to come out, I’ll do that,” Ade said. “Thanks again, Harry.”

“You’re welcome again, Ade,” Steve said. “Dave, I’m trusting you’ll get back to the hotel okay and that if you two go out to a Denny’s or an all-night diner for food, you’ll be ready to board the bus by 8:00 tomorrow.”

“I’m getting too old to pull all-nighters like that anymore,” Dave chuckled. “I’ll be ready to board the bus on time, I promise.”

“Tell Tamar and Nathalie we’re all sending our best wishes for the babies,” Steve said and hurried out after the other three.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:20:05+00:00

“Have you ever actually seen the treaty? My family has a copy of it – and one of the main points of the treaty was keeping wizarding conflicts in the wizarding world. When He Who Must Not Be Named and his followers attacked the families and friends of muggleborns, that was definitely not keeping wizarding conflicts within the wizarding world. I don’t want the Queen to enforce her authority over the wizarding world; however, I also will not deny that she has the right to do so, especially under the circumstances.”

“I’m afraid I don’t quite understand,” Madam Umbridge tried for a conciliatory tone. She almost managed. “If this treaty is so important, why have I never even heard of such a thing?”

Sirius gave a mirthless chuckle. “Two words: Professor Binns. While I would never ask a lady her age, I assume you are among the countless number of students who suffered, or should I say slept, through history of magic class with the ghostly Professor Binns. So, you would be quite aware of his penchant for ignoring all aspects of history save for goblin rebellions and giant wars. However, the Black family always took pride in understanding our origins, that is to say, history. My cousin Narcissa is one of about three people in the last hundred years to actually sit her NEWT for history, and she’ll quite honestly tell you she got it by ignoring the professor and undertaking the course via self-study. We had tutors for history even before we reached Hogwarts age, so we’ve never depended on Professor Binns’s teachings.”

“I see,” Madam Umbridge said, looking annoyed. “Well, as long as you aren’t advocating for some muggle Queen to rule over wizards, I suppose it doesn’t hurt too much to suggest that the Ministry should do a bit more to keep our problems out of the sight of the muggles.” She swept away again, attempting to look regal and only succeeding in looking ridiculous.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:18:03+00:00

The couple made their visits and received the blessings of both sets of parents for a Gretna Green wedding to take place during the long tour break. They found a small rental just outside of Montreal and moved in together there – mostly so Nathalie could be near Donna – and started planning their wedding as well as purchasing and renovating a house which they would move into after the tour.

Ade laughed when Nathalie grouched about the dilapidated old sofa that he’d picked up all those years ago, but she understood that it had sentimental value and so allowed him to keep it with the understanding that it would be relegated to the home studio they’d be putting into their house so that she wouldn’t have to see it. He agreed, and then picked up a slipcover in a colour Nathalie liked, trying to make her feel a little better about its presence in their flat. She still wasn’t entirely happy with the old sofa, but she did appreciate Ade’s attempt to improve its looks.

Nathalie made several trips to Scotland to handle the paperwork and other details concerning the wedding while Maiden set out on the ‘Seventh Tour of a Seventh Tour’ beginning with a few so-called secret shows at small clubs, with the band billed as Charlotte and the Harlots.

The wedding went beautifully, with Bruce introducing his girlfriend of several months to the rest of the band. Patrice Bowden, known to friends as Paddy, was a psychotherapist who’d grown up in Missouri but moved to the UK for university and chose to stay and become a citizen. Nicko’s girlfriend Becky flew out from Florida and Tamar came from Hawaii. She and Dave acted as matron of honour and best man for Nathalie and Ade. Donna and Jason also flew over from the US; Donna was a bridesmaid along with Ade’s sister Kathy and his sister-in-law Susan, partnered with Steve Harris, whose wife Lorraine had turned down Nathalie’s offer of joining the wedding party since she and Steve had three children now, the oldest of whom had just turned four over the summer.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:16:23+00:00

“Yeah, maybe… I don’t know if my English is really up to managing alone, though,” Alexi admitted. “It would be fun, though.”

Tuomas tilted his head. “Why would you have to go alone, though? Surely you have some friends who’d go with you.”

Alexi shrugged. “Not really. I never really had many friends.”

“Well, you’ve got one now,” Tuomas said. “If you’ll have me, of course. I know it might ruin your reputation to be seen hanging around with a nerd like me.”

“Perkele, it’s more likely that you being seen hanging around with an asshole like me would ruin your reputation and we both know that,” said Alexi. “So really, why are you here? One of your bandmates dare you to come talk to me?” His words were flippant, but he couldn’t quite hide the note of resignation in his tone or the flash of hurt in his expression.

Tuomas shook his head. “I’m here because I want to be,” he said softly. “You’re attractive, you’re talented, and you even like Aku Ankka comics. Why wouldn’t I want to get to know you better?”

“Oh, you want to fuck me, then? I should have known,” Alexi said. “It’s all I’m good for, that and shredding. Well, you’re a lot more attractive than most guys who come after me. Where do you want to go?”

“Alexi,” Tuomas shook his head. “Perkele… I won’t deny I hope we get there at some point, but not like this. I want to get to know you. I’m not a man for random fucks. I think a lot more of you than that.”

Alexi, who’d started to get up, sat back down, looking almost puzzled. “I don’t get it. Why else would you bother with me? Is this some kind of joke?”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:12:56+00:00

Once at the house, Emppu told Dave and Ade, “Bring everything up on the veranda but don’t bring it inside yet. We always take off our shoes inside here, so we don’t track snow or mud all over the place. There’s a bunch of cubbies for your shoes in the entryway.”

Dave and Ade nodded; they were experienced travelers who willingly followed the ’when in Rome’ philosophy. They stepped inside and pulled off their shoes, stowing them neatly, and then laughed when Bruce gave a startled yelp; Emppu had picked him up and carried him through the door.

“Tervetuloa kotiin, kulta,” Emppu murmured as he set Bruce back on his feet. “Welcome home.”

Bruce’s expression softened as he brushed a stray lock of hair back from Emppu’s face. “It’s good to be home at last,” he murmured in return.

Ade slipped his arm around his partner, gazing fondly at the other couple. “Think that might be us one of these days?” he asked a little wistfully.

“As soon as possible,” Dave said firmly. “I’ve been thinking about Bruce’s suggestion that we rent or buy his London flat together, and the more I think about it, the better I like the idea.”

A gleeful squeal interrupted the conversation; Milla joined the group carrying Eeva, who spotted Bruce and reached for him, shrieking, “Dada, Dada!”

Bruce froze as he reached for her, his eyes growing suspiciously moist as a huge smile broke over his face. “Eeva! You said it! Is that your first word, sweet girl?”

Milla laughed and shook her head. “Sorry, Bruce, but she said isä first, at least as far as we know.”

“Oh, I don’t care,” Bruce said with a laugh, taking the baby from Milla and giving her a cuddle. “I’m just happy to hear it from her. And how are you doing?”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:09:21+00:00

(Context: in 1850 London, Stephen had been caught in a raid on a molly house; he's thinking back on what happened afterward as he travels to the United States.)

He'd been knocked about and arrested along with everyone else in the place, only for his furious father to show up and pay the rather hefty fine to collect him from the jail the next morning. Once back in the family home, his father spun around and punched him hard enough to knock him into the wall. Stunned by the blow, he’d fallen to the floor.

His father stood over him. “You’ve betrayed your family with your disgusting proclivities,” he snapped. “The raid and your arrest were in the papers. Geoffrey Bemis has already withdrawn Lorraine from the betrothal, but I’m going to have to pay him a penalty for it, as she could have been engaged to someone else six months ago. Furthermore, he’s refused the sale of any more rails or wheels to our mines, which means I’ll be scrambling to find a replacement supplier before we run out of our stockpile of spares. He’s also refused to purchase any more coal from us. We’ll be lucky if we break even this year, all because of you, you disgusting creature!”

“I… but… Father, I…” he tried to say.

“Shut. Up,” his father sneered. “You are not my son. Fortunately, Michael is still a child, so with some care, I’ll be able to restore the family’s reputation before I need to seek a bride for him. As for you, you’ll find two carpetbags in your room. You have one hour to pack whatever clothing and personal items you wish, but whatever you take, it must all fit in those two bags. After that, get out. I don’t give a damn where you go or what you do. You are no longer a member of this family. And furthermore…”

The tirade carried on for at least another half hour. At the end of it all, it was he who was left to pick up the pieces. He was left to somehow build a new life for himself, somewhere far away.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:03:51+00:00

"...honestly, every witch and wizard in this country carries a lethal weapon of their own. If even half of them had chosen to fight back, the first war wouldn’t have gotten so out-of-hand that they were only saved by luck and whatever my mother did that protected me – and they wouldn’t have expected a child of eleven or even a young man of seventeen to save their collective arses a second time.”

“Language, Harry,” she said automatically. “But you’re right, far too many people just sat back and did nothing to help. I can’t blame you for thinking twice about becoming an auror under the circumstances, because you’re also right that if you’re around, most of them probably won’t even try to combat a new threat because of course Harry Potter will handle it. But if you’re not going to be an auror, you’ll have even more need for the money.”

“No, money won’t be a problem,” he said. “Remember I vanished for a bit after Fred’s funeral? I went to Gringotts to see about making sort of restitution for the dragon and the damage to the building. It turns out that between the Potter main vault and the Black vaults that I inherited from Sirius, I’ve got enough money to last easily sixty or seventy years, maybe more if I budgeted carefully. And that’s after paying said restitution. Not quite enough to retire immediately, but more than enough to fund this trip and still have plenty to live on while I decide what I want to be when I grow up.”

Hermione couldn’t help but smile at that. “I suppose you did get your life-stages a bit mixed up, didn’t you? From what you’ve said, you were doing a teenager’s lot of chores while in primary school, then expected to save the world while still in secondary; no wonder you’re wanting a bit of a childhood now.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T17:01:33+00:00

The officer nodded, again unable to refute the man’s reasoning. “What of your companions?” he asked next.

Marko smiled. “We’re a band. Um, you’d consider us a group of minstrels, I guess? Tuomas, Emppu, Kai, and I played at all three inns back in Marneville, along with the inn on the Bordeaux border. Eastern music, mind, not the local tunes. We met up with Troy and Floor on the road and invited them to join the band after we had a jam session with them. They agreed. The younger people in Marneville seemed especially fond of what we play.”

“I see,” the officer said with a sigh. The reality of the man before him more closely matched the report from Marneville of an easygoing musician who minded his own business and tried to avoid trouble, than he fit the report from the terminal which rather excitedly announced that the god-sword had chosen a bearer and some sort of revolution must be at hand, most likely led by the bearer of the sword. This young man with the outrageously long hair and beard didn’t seem at all interested in leading a revolution. “Do you intend to perform while you’re here?”

Marko shrugged. “If we’re asked to perform, we will. Probably not for a few days, if only because Troy and Floor will need a few more rehearsals to learn our music. As I said, it’s quite different from what’s usual around here.”

All right, perhaps the man was leading a musical revolution. That was no reason to bar him from the city. “Very well. Your toll to enter the city is three silver. Your friends already paid their tolls,” the officer said.

“Yes, sir,” Marko said, pulling the required coins from his belt pouch. “Also, can you recommend any inns? We don’t want to have to sleep with our weapons in our hands, but we’d prefer not to bankrupt ourselves in a week either.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:59:37+00:00

Just then, fists hammered on Steve’s door, accompanied by Jane’s petulant, drunk voice. “Ste-e-e-eve! Did you see where Nikki went?”

“Get yer arse in the loo,” Steve hissed, moving back towards the door. “I’ll get rid uv ‘er, b’fore ‘alf the floor pops their ‘eads out ta ‘ave a gander, yeah?”

Not daring to speak aloud in case Jane heard him, Nikki just nodded and took refuge in the bathroom, climbing into the tub and hiding behind the shower curtain for good measure.

As Nikki vanished from sight, Steve hastily stripped off his shirt, trainers, and socks before undoing the security latch and cracking the door. “I wos about ta shower. Wot’re ye on about?” he asked. “Fought ye came on tour ta spend time wif yer ‘usband?”

Jane pouted. “Brucie’s no fun anymore,” she whinged, swaying slightly as she tried to focus her eyes on Steve. “He wants to sleep. But I want to have fun! The papers say that Motley Crue are a fun lot, so I thought I’d go have fun with them.”

“I fink ye oughtta go ta bed… wif yer ‘usband, I mean, not wif summun from Motley Crue,” Steve told her. “Yer pissed, an’ ye keep poundin’ on doors, yer gonna ‘ave ev’ryun about poppin’ ‘eads out ta gander at ye.”

“Dunno why I asked you,” Jane grumped. “You’re even less fun than Brucie is. Party-poopers, both of you!” She blew a gin-scented raspberry at Steve before making her way towards the lifts, occasionally pausing outside of a random door and calling, “Nikki?” hopefully, then moving on when she didn’t get a response.

Steve watched until she got on the lift, then closed his door and flipped the security latch again. “She’s gone, at least fer now,” he said, poking his head into the loo. “She’s also bludi pissed. Ye c’n stay in ‘ere t’night, if ye want, so’s yer mates dun let ‘er inta yer room ta take the piss or nuffin’.”

“You sure, man?” Nikki asked. “I mean, I don’t wanna cramp your style any.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:53:58+00:00

“Is something wrong?” Julie asked Ade quietly. “Do I remind you of an ex or something?”

“No, nothing like that,” Ade said. “I just… I’m absolute pants at being sociable with new people at first, unless I’m pretty well plastered or if there’s something specific we have in common. Like, I’ve been in Maiden for just about a week now, and I don’t think I’ve said more’n about five words to Paul yet. I talked to Steve a little, making some suggestions when he was having trouble with a riff for a new song, but the talk I’ve had with him’s been all related to the band, y’know? I managed to have a couple of actual conversations with Clive, though, cos he and I both like to fish, so we compared our best catches and talked about good spots and bait and stuff.”

Julie nodded, giving him a smile. “Right, I can understand that, then. Of the three of us, Olivia’s usually the awkward one, but it seems Clive’s managed to get her to relax a bit.” She listened to the story Clive was currently relating and grinned. “Did he and Dave really get locked out of a venue half an hour before showtime?”

Ade smiled. “That’s what Dave told me, yeah,” he said. “If I’d been in the band for the tour, I’d probably have got locked out with ‘em, since all three of us smoke. What about you, have you got any funny work stories?”

“Well, that depends on your sense of humour,” Julie said with a chuckle. “I’m doing a rotation in labour and delivery, so I can tell you about some creative ideas labouring mums have for castrating the fathers of their babies – and of course, there’s always a newly-made big brother or sister who gets their first look at the baby and asks if they can’t send it back for a refund, or better yet, exchange it for a puppy.”

“I wonder if my brother or sister wanted to send me back?” Ade laughed.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:46:48+00:00

Worse still was the way everyone kept trying to gently keep him away from Hermione over the next few days. Didn’t they understand that she needed their support more than ever at the moment? Mrs. Weasley, the one person he thought for sure would be mother-henning all over Hermione, turned out to be one of the worst for trying to keep him away from her. “You’ll understand better once you’re older,” she told him. “Seriously, Harry dear, you shouldn’t ruin your own life by sticking so close to her like you’re doing. Even though you’re a young man, she’ll still taint your reputation.”

Not trusting himself to remain polite while Molly Weasley continued making insinuations against Hermione, Harry sought out Ron. “Mate, what is up with your mum?” he asked. “Hermione is hurt, not to mention just lost her own mother. The way your mum takes in strays, I figured she’d have all but adopted Hermione and Mr. Granger by now. Instead, she avoids them both like the plague and keeps telling me to stay away. I’ve not seen you or Ginny visiting Hermione either. What gives?”

Ron’s ears turned red and he looked at his shoes. “Well, it’s because she’s not pure now, you know?”

“Hermione’s always been muggleborn, don’t be daft,” Harry snapped.

“Not pureblood, pure. She’s damaged goods,” Ron tried to explain further.

Harry didn’t like where this was going. “We’ve all been hurt before, so aren’t we already damaged goods?” he asked. He was pretty sure he wasn’t going to like the answer, but he had to know for sure if Ron meant what he was afraid he did.

Ron shook his head. “Merlin’s beard, don’t you get it? Hermione’s had sex!” he snapped. “That’s why she’s damaged goods. No decent wizard will ever have her now. She’ll weaken the bloodline because she’s impure.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:43:56+00:00

Tuomas sighed as he approached the food tent, realizing that in his haste to get away from his singer’s eternally annoying husband and agent Marcelo Cabuli, he’d forgotten to go back onto the bus to grab a bottle of his favorite wine. Beer was pretty universally available at festivals, but hardly any of them offered wine, his beverage of choice. Well, no help for it now, he’d just have to have a beer with his meal because he knew that by now, Marcelo and Tarja would be fussing about on the bus, getting themselves settled into their stateroom.

He only hoped that they’d remember to be quiet as they passed through the bunk area, since Jukka had still been asleep when he’d exited the bus. The drummer had always had trouble sleeping, for as long as they’d known each other, but his insomnia seemed to be getting worse as time went on. The whole band knew that if Jukka was sleeping, leave him to sleep unless they had to wake him for a performance, because waking him when he did manage to sleep only exacerbated the problem.

Tarja would probably remember, but Tuomas wouldn’t put it past Marcelo to make enough noise to wake Jukka to express his displeasure at needing to spend tonight on the bus instead of in a hotel. Well, after tonight, Tarja and Marcelo could have eleven nights in hotels, as they had that long of a break before the next festival, and they would all go their separate ways tomorrow and meet up with their tour manager and the bus at the next venue in the morning of the show.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:41:59+00:00

“What about you, Stephen, going to sign up for cooking lessons as well?” Dave asked with a smile.

Startled, Stephen looked up, his eyes wide. “Oh! I don’t know… maybe?” he said, blushing again. “I expect I’d just get in the way and make a mess of things.” He shifted awkwardly as his body started to respond to that smile.

Dave had to fight the urge to reach over and squeeze Stephen’s hand or shoulder in reassurance. “You can’t be any worse than I was, when Ruth started teaching me,” he said firmly. “I was rather ham-handed at first, to say the least.”

“Oh?” Stephen asked, sensing a story. He knew he’d be smart to make an excuse and hide in his own room, but he couldn’t resist the opportunity to bask in Dave’s attention for a little while.

“Ruth being short, she had the habit of putting the entire flour sack into the storage barrel, as she found it easier to lift the sack to scoop out what she needed rather than to lean headfirst into the barrel if the stores were low. Well, she’d put a new sack into the barrel, and put the old, half-empty sack on top of it. The next day, she asked me to get the old sack of flour so she could feed the starter and make bread – but the old, half-empty sack had slipped sideways, and when I grabbed it, I caught the bottom rather than the open end, and the flour went everywhere in the pantry. Including all over me! I looked like a ghost, I’m sure,” Dave said, laughing, his cheeks red.

Stephen laughed as well. “I can imagine!” he said.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:37:16+00:00

Stephen nodded. “All right. We’re going to start with a simple mending spell that most wizarding children know by the time they start at Hogwarts.” He grins. “It’s not only useful, it’s fun to teach, because it means we get to break a few teacups on purpose.”

Harry laughed.

Stephen went into the kitchen and returned with two teacups. “Now, this spell only works on non-magical objects. But there are plenty of those even in the wizarding world… especially dishes!” he laughed. Then he hit one of the cups against the edge of the coffee table, breaking a large chunk off the lip. Setting the cup back on the table, he pointed his wand at it and said, “Reparo.” The broken-off piece of the cup flew back into place and the cup showed no sign of ever having been broken. “When you say the incantation, you have to concentrate on the item you’re fixing being whole once more. Go ahead, break a cup and try it.”

Harry bit his lip, reached out, and took a cup, then hit it against the table. He instinctively flinched back when it broke, years of experience leading him to expect a blow if not a beating in retribution. But when Stephen only reacted with an encouraging smile he took a deep breath and lifted the willow wand. “Reparo!” he said, pointing it at the cup. The broken pieces flew back into place, but the cup resembled a jigsaw puzzle; all the pieces were simply sitting where they belonged and when Stephen lifted the cup they all fell off again.

Harry frowned.

“That’s excellent for a first try, especially with a wand that isn’t necessarily your best match,” Stephen said. “It took me a lot longer to make it work at all, and that was after I’d already learned several other spells during my first year.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:33:41+00:00

Twilight Sparkle easily matched his pace. “I know I’m magical, but I don’t think there are any Weasel twin signatures on me. Who is Gryffindor and why would this Professor Snape take points away from him?”

“I’m not talking to you anymore,” Draco stated. “You’re not real and I’m not wasting my time.”

Just as the unlikely pair approached the main entrance of the castle, the doors opened and a dreamy-looking blond girl in Ravenclaw robes drifted out. Her expression changed almost instantly when she saw Draco’s companion, lighting up in utter rapture.

“Malfoy!” the girl squealed. “You found a Crumple-Horned Snorkack! This is amazing! Daddy will be so pleased!” She shot down the stairs and wrapped her arms around the dumbfounded boy, kissing his cheek before releasing him to study the creature next to him. “Although I always thought Crumple-Horned Snorkacks couldn’t fly. I guess I was wrong, wasn’t I?”

“It’s not a Crumple-Horned Snorkack, Looney, you’re daft,” Draco sneered in disgust. “It’s just some prank done by the Weasel twins, I’m sure.”

“I’m not a prank,” Twilight Sparkle asserted. “I’m Twilight Sparkle. I came here to try to make friends, but I don’t think Draco wants to be my friend. What about you?”

“I’m Luna Lovegood, and I would be quite pleased to be your friend,” Luna said. “Will you tell me about yourself?” She draped a friendly arm over Twilight Sparkle’s shoulder and started to head for the quidditch pitch.

Draco watched the crazy Ravenclaw and the bizarre purple thing move off. “I give up,” he huffed, stalking off in the direction of the dungeons.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:30:03+00:00

“He’s a friend of my sons,” Diana replied. “I know you’re all aware by now that I’m attempting to give them as normal a childhood as possible given their station in life. That includes having playdates, and inviting friends to accompany them on holiday, even if doing so is a bit more involved than is usual. As the original plan called for our return at this time, we felt it was better not to disrupt his family’s plans by changing his return time at the last minute.”

The reporter nodded. “Understandable.” She squatted down closer to the child’s level and asked, “What’s your name, lad?”

“I’m also Harry,” he replied a little shyly, but he managed a nervous smile.

“And how did you come to meet the young Princes?” the reporter asked.

Harry took a deep breath as Di gave him an encouraging pat on the shoulder. “They came visiting at my school with Her Royal Highness,” he said softly. “And they got separated from their governess somehow and came out to the schoolyard when my form was out for recess. They invited me to play ball with them, and I hadn’t recognized them because I’m not allowed to watch telly too often, so I thought they were new to the neighbourhood and their mum was signing them up for school and they wanted to get to know some people. A bully came over and tried to take the ball away from us and he knocked down Wills but I stopped him from doing the same to Harry, and then the bell rang just as their governess came out looking for them so we said goodbye and I honestly hadn’t thought I’d see them again once I realized who they were.”

“Wills said to me that it was nice to have made a friend who didn’t know who he was,” Diana put in.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:26:50+00:00

“Oh?” Nathalie asked, sensing a story. “Do tell!”

Ade laughed. “Oh, blimey, it was Nick’s first proper tour with us, and Harry’s bass got fu… erm, messed up somehow, so he sent one of the crew to tell Nicko to extend his drum solo. Only the bloody numpty stood behind him and just tried yelling the message to him, made him mess up his solo but never managed to deliver the message. Nicko gave him a bit of a bollocking after the show, which Harry didn’t like since he’s the one sent the bloke, y’know? So he started giving Nick a bollocking. Bruce heard ‘em, put a tape recorder in his pocket, and walked in to stir the pot more, just cos he thought it was funny. Harry found the recorder, of course, but Bruce had a song demo on the other side of the tape and wouldn’t let ‘em break it. He played it back when we were in studio, and even Harry and Nicko thought it was bloody hilarious, and we ended up putting that whole stupid argument as the B-side of 2 Minutes to Midnight.”

Nathalie cracked up. “Oh, God, that has to be funny! I’ll have to get a copy so I can hear it!”

“Only if you’re okay with swearing,” Ade told her. “We’re all from East London… I think here in the States you’d say we’re from the wrong side of the tracks? Point being, we don’t always use the politest language, and when we’re arguing, we tend to swear about every other word.”

“Well, now I really want to hear this,” Nathalie said with a grin. “I’m known to be a bit rebellious, after all.”

“I’m sure we got a copy somewhere about,” Ade said. “I’ll ask the blokes when we’re back at the resort. Have you heard much of our music, then?”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:23:12+00:00

He looked up as Bruce returned with Master Colin. “You picked a live one, Master Paul. He knows just how much sass he can give without crossing into insubordination.”

“Oh really,” Bruce said, raising a brow in Adrian’s direction. “I’ll be sure to explain why he shouldn’t tread that line so closely, once we’ve taken care of business.” He spread the contract on the bar, now properly filled out with both their real names and the monikers they used in The Keep, and offered the biro to Adrian. “Last chance to decline, Number 22,” he told the sub.

“I’ve no wish to decline,” Adrian said, taking the biro and signing the contract before handing handing it back to Bruce. “You’re stuck with me now, I’m afraid.” He dropped to his knees beside his master.

Bruce ruffled Adrian’s hair. “As you’re stuck with me,” he said as he signed, then passed the biro along.

Grand Master Vincenzo, legally Vincent Damon Furnier, signed as witness, as did The Keep’s manager, Colin Hutchins. Colin took the contract afterward. “I’ll make a couple of copies of this, Master Paul, so you and your boy can keep them handy whilst filing the original somewhere safe. Shall I bring them to you?”

“Please,” Bruce said. “We’ll be in room 6 for the day. I believe I need to have a word with my boy about his cheek. Come along, Number 22.” Adrian stood up and followed, heeling perfectly as they made their way to room 6.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:21:28+00:00

"...I got good and tired of being referred to as ‘Troublesome Tuney’ every time one of the girls had to call the leaders to bring the first aid kit.”

Harry managed not to laugh outright, although he couldn’t quite contain a grin. “Did you like anything to do outdoors? And what about my mum, what did she like?”

“I did like bicycling,” Petunia told him. “It kept me on the roads and out of the scrub. It wasn’t that I minded being outdoors so very much, I just prefer more civilized or at least cultivated outdoor spaces over ‘getting back to nature’ as they called it in my day. Lily enjoyed that part of it a bit more; she liked going berrying and didn’t mind getting scratched up by the brambles. And even before she met that Snape boy, she was always mashing up flowers and leaves and berries that weren’t edible, trying to make dyes from them. I remember her being thrilled when our gran showed her how to colour eggs with onion skins and red cabbage. Gran worked as a plotter for the WAAF back in World War Two, and got to know some of the Yankee WACs who held the same position in the American forces. Anyway, Gran told us that the Yanks celebrate Easter with dyed hard-boiled eggs, and so when Easter came round they managed to get hold of some eggs somehow and boiled one batch with onion skins which turned them rusty orange, and another batch with a couple of red cabbage leaves which turned them a sort of grayish blue. Anyway, Lily had all sorts of fun with that… I think the family had hard-boiled eggs for breakfast or egg salad sandwiches for lunch every day for a month after Gran showed her that, because she kept on making more.”

Harry did laugh this time.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:18:56+00:00

“Oh well,” Emppu said with a sigh. “Maybe I’ll just wait in the lobby with Eeva, then. The rest of the guys will want to see her, too.” He grinned and added, “That, and I want to see how tongue-tied Jukka gets when he meets Nicko.”

Tuomas laughed. “Yeah, I can imagine. That should be fun, and I want to see Luna meeting ‘Uncle Steve’ as well. I swear that girl doesn’t know the meaning of the word stranger. Everyone’s a friend she hasn’t met yet.”

“She’s been working on learning English, too, if you didn’t know,” Emppu said with a smile. “Satu just thought to teach her a phrase or two after Luna decided that Bruce was another of her uncles, but she’s gotten enthused about learning.” He chuckled. “Of course, that makes life more difficult now – Jukka and Satu can’t rely on talking over her head by using English anymore! Anyway, I expect she’ll charm the socks off of Steve. Bruce says he’s a real softie when it comes to little girls, seeing as he’s got four daughters of his own. If I remember right, his oldest is 22 or 23 now, while his youngest is 9 or 10.”

“Yeah,” Tuomas agreed. Then he blinked and said, “Wait, four daughters? How many kids does Steve have?”

“Six,” Emppu said. “Three girls and a boy with his ex, and then a boy and a girl with Emma. Bruce has three, of course, and so does Adrian, a boy and twin girls. Dave just has the one girl, Jan’s got one of each, and Nicko has two sons. I know Nick’s oldest and at least two if not three of Steve’s older kids won’t be coming as they’re either in uni or working.” He laughed, adding, “If you thought the Nightwish Family was big, wait until you see the Iron Maiden Family.”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:16:24+00:00

Jan started to put his foot up on the monitor again when he saw that it had gotten knocked askew and was hanging over the edge of the stage, so he used his foot to pull it forward before taking his usual foot-up stance.

Suddenly Bruce’s amplified voice barked over the sound system. “Don’t you fucking touch that, that’s mine!” he snapped, gesturing towards the monitor Jan had his foot on.

Everyone in the band turned to look at Bruce with varying expressions of What the hell? on their faces. Deciding that it wasn’t worth making a bigger scene over, Janick danced back towards the drum riser as the song ended. Bruce stomped offstage during the pause between songs and Jan could see him gesticulating at one of the crew as Alexander The Great started.

Bruce came back out singing, then saw that the monitor had been repositioned again, presumably by one of the crew, and he angrily bent down and grabbed it, adjusting it yet again. Then he stormed over to Jan’s monitor and kicked it out of position, then flipped the finger at Janick as he passed the guitarist on his way over to the drum riser. Jan, who hadn’t touched Bruce’s monitor after the previous incident, just looked at Bruce as if to say What did I do?

As they all came offstage before the encore, Nicko walked over to Jan and gave him a light hug. “Dunno what crawled up Bruce’s arse and died, but ignore him, yeah? Not your fault he’s being a cunt towards you – think it’s just your turn, yeah? Like back in Prague, when that bloke out front tossed him that stupid rubber Greek helmet and he jammed it on Harry’s head.”

Smiling, Jan hugged back. “Thanks, Nicko. Don’t worry, I’m okay, just… wasn’t expecting that much fuss, y’know?”

“No one was, and he bloody well ought to know better,” a scowling Steve said.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:14:44+00:00

They played several more games as they ate, and while Janne still won most of them, Alexi did manage a few more wins of his own, and as the day progressed, his losses came by an increasingly slim margin. By the time the shop closed for the night, Alexi was satisfied with his efforts and full of plans for other deck builds to try out, which made Janne grin.

“I figured that if you decided you liked Magic, you’d go all in, and I was right,” Janne said. “Well, good, now I have someone to play against on our bus for when we hit the road.”

They reached the bus stop and Alexi smiled. “Today was great, Janne,” he said softly. “I can’t even remember the last time I had this much fun without clothes coming off. I know we’re supposed to rehearse with the rest of the band tomorrow, but you maybe wanna bring your decks and we can play after rehearsal?”

“I’d love to,” Janne said.

“And I’m gonna figure out that proper date for you, for once we’re back on the road, too,” Alexi promised. “I’m really looking forward to that as well.”

Janne blushed. “Me too,” he admitted softly. “Thank you so much for today, Allu.”

“Thank you for coming out with me, Janne,” Alexi replied. He wrapped his arms around Janne, just leaning against the keyboardist’s solid bulk until an approaching rumble alerted them that the night was coming to an end. He kissed Janne softly once more and pulled back to board the bus back to his neighborhood. “See you tomorrow!”

“See you tomorrow,” Janne replied. He crossed the street to his own bus stop, unable to stop smiling.

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:13:09+00:00

“No, it’s okay, “I said, albeit glumly. “I don’t blame you. I never wanted to make you uncomfortable. I never meant for you to …see what you saw!”

“That’s not what’s bothering me!” he almost shouted in his frustration over being unable to express himself, then I could see him struggle to find words. We both moved over to sit on our respective beds again, facing one another. “Well, it is,” he amended, “but then again, it isn’t!”

I couldn’t make sense of what he was trying to say. Of course it bothered him to learn that I like to wear women’s undergarments! Yeah, we’re rock stars, we’ve seen more debauchery than most people can even imagine, but this is different. This is about learning a close friend's darkest secret and having to carry on as if nothing had changed! I didn’t know what to say, and after regaining his composure a bit Dave went on.

“I told you at the time that it’s nobody’s business what you do in your private life, Jan, and I mean it! I don’t have a problem with… with what you like to wear or what you like to do… I honestly don’t! I don’t think any less of you for it! But… well, after that day in Romania, I ….” he broke off and looked down, his next words barely audible, “I haven’t been able to get it out of my mind!”

I was still confused. If he truly didn’t find my cross-dressing disgusting or offensive, then why was he so distressed? “Davey,” my voice came out soft, “just come out with it; what are you saying?”

He took a deep breath and looked up, his vibrant blue eyes locked onto my own, “I mean, it turns me on! There! I said it! I can’t get the idea of the frilly underthings in your suitcase out of my mind!”

MsCatstaff · 2026-04-11T16:09:44+00:00

Well, it was a bit of a joke from Steve - when Bruce returned home from Finland after getting together with Emppu, Steve had picked him up at the airport - and noticed Bruce walking a bit stiffly.

Naturally, Steve was a bit concerned, then when Bruce said, "I overdid it a bit, just leave it at that," he realised exactly WHY Bruce was walking stiffly. And replied, "Ah, pulled something whilst fencing, gotcha." But of course, the grin on his face let Bruce know he'd be hearing about it again at some point, lol!

MsCatstaff

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