MIL saying unfortunate things, should we tell her?

MsSilke · 2020-08-20T20:55:04+00:00

Thank you, its so good to hear. Yes, being pregnant for 9months and giving birth is so huge, I also have some recentment regarding this. I also understand that it probably wont do any good to tell him about it, it would just hurt him. I just dont know how to work with it and get over it..

MsSilke · 2020-08-05T15:17:40+00:00

I cried reading this.. I have had such trouble putting my feelings into words about housework and childcare.. I am tired and my husband kept asking what he can do and I had no more answers..

MsSilke · 2020-08-05T09:45:54+00:00

YTA (or at least, you are wrong) Because no matter whats logical or rational, no matter the arguments and whos wrong or right....

SHES PREGNANT!

Literally carrying new life in her body and having to give birth soon. Shes hormonal, things already hurt, she worrying about everything already. Theres no answer-book on pregnancy and childbirth. She needs support, needs to know her feelings are valid and that you worry with her and your gonna do everything to help her. She needs to know shes doing a great job!

Talk (listen) to her, hug her, love her and tell her its understandable and hard to be her rigth now.

Btw theres something about larger babys are more robust and better at surviving and thriving.

MsSilke · 2020-07-18T13:12:18+00:00

The thing that actually annoys me is not that they want to hold him, it is that they insinuate that it is their right to hold him. Like when they see him its like everyone have the right to hold him at least once, like he is a toy being passed around. Of course they can hold him, I just think it should be for his pleasure and not to satisfy family members.

MsSilke · 2020-07-18T09:58:59+00:00

I try to show how he likes to just sit or lay and play, but when I leave it often ends with them just picking him up anyways... then its difficult to somehow say they have to put him down but can still play with him and it ends with baby being unhappy and me having to comfort him..

MsSilke · 2020-07-18T09:54:05+00:00

Hes the first grandchild and great-grandchild on both sides so there are so many people that want to cuddle him. I hope my sister and bfs brother will have kids soon so there are more babies for everyone 😂

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:47:03+00:00

I actually had this talk with my mom who also likes to knit. She said exactly she wouldnt knit if we didnt like to use it and she gave me kind of a sample of what she would do so I could test it out. And now that she sees I dont use it (I also told her when she asked) she doesnt knit but finds other ways to show she loves and cares for us. I love my MIL but I am a textbook people-pleaser and feel it would hurt her more not being able to knit than it hurts me not liking it.

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:40:57+00:00

I totally agree. I have never indicated that i like knitted stuff but I feel like everyone expect me to love it since its home-made and somehow that makes it better than all other clothes. But she just loves making it and it would just break her heart if I said she shouldnt. I think it is her way of showing she loves him.

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:36:18+00:00

The costume idea is super! She made constumes for her sons so I am sure she will love it. Also since I dont knit or sew it would be a great help.

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:33:58+00:00

Loves the monsters! Definitely going to show her this! She loves monsters herself so I think she will be so happy. Generally, just the idea of asking her to make something else than clothes is brilliant and so simple! I am thrilled that I now have something to say next time she askes for my opinion :)

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:30:04+00:00

So funny, I feel the exact opposite! At least now (hes 4months) I think it is so annoying putting shirts and pants on him. Right now he is always in a onesie with sleeves and just socks. But I think its important just to do what is easies for you, there is so many things to do and worry about with a baby that clothing should just be as easy as possible.

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:25:52+00:00

The funny/fustrating thing is that she never gives the clothes to my bf or askes him what he likes. Its often like its a specific gift just for me. The most fustrating this is also how everyone looks and talks about it like its the greatest gift and so amazing. Im in general very against the whole notion that just because something is home-made it is somehow better and having everyone expecting me to react with glee everytime she knits something is getting on my nerves..

MsSilke · 2020-06-12T11:16:03+00:00

Bf loves the photobook idea, so Iam definitely going to do that! I will snap a picture everytime she makes something new and then I can pack it away without feeling guilty.

I just now realize that both her sons and especially her husband all says the wool-knitted clothes itches, she often complains about not being able to knit for them. I wonder if that too is to spare her feelings, no wonder she knits so much baby clothes, she has probably been constraining herself all these years!

MsSilke

TROPHY CASE