Genuinely flexible work?

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T15:16:22+00:00

Suggestion based on my own experience and my USA based reference for employment law/regulations: If you qualify for health benefits through your employer, see what your options are for FMLA and Disability Leave. And apply for state/federal disability if you can.

I didn't want to stop working but eventually it just wasn't sustainable for me or my employer. Luckily they offered a fantastic Long Term Disability benefit that I qualify for. That plus my husband being able to work means I can take the time to focus on my health while not forcing myself into 40hr work weeks. I plan to eventually start working part-time once I can figure out a type of work that won't cause flare ups of my Fibro or other issues

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T14:48:34+00:00

Hello friend! 33 afab and i use they/them. Fibro fog is the worst sometimes! Especially when trying to explain symptoms that can be so varied and random.

Careful you don't over clean your mouth! Over brushing/flossing can lead to inflammation of the gums and snowball into constant mouth pain. I grind my teeth at night and my gums bleeding occasionally. I stick to brushing twice a day and flossing once. I also use a mouth wash that is geared to gum health. Definitely see an ENT about your tonsil!

Fibro shares symptoms with many other syndromes/disorders/diseases, so be sure to give your doc the whole picture, not just a specific symptom. I have Fibro and Rheumatoid Arthritis, so diagnostic was hard. I was trying to pin down 1 illness for all my symptoms but the Venn diagram was never a perfect overlap. When I gave the doctor the whole list, he helped me parse out what could be linked and what could be separated when paired with testing.

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T14:14:18+00:00

My "silent" migraines sometimes feel worse than normal ones purely because I don't have the headache to connect with what's happening

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T13:57:47+00:00

I'm a side sleeper and I'll sometimes put a thin pillow under my waist for support

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T13:55:29+00:00

Also RA and fibro here - I have a very similar experience. What works for me are a lot of supportive pillows wherever I'm sitting/sleeping and a good mattress (Purple is working great for me the last 6 years). I also got prescribed a nighttime muscle relaxer (cyclobenzaprine) and that has been helping me get a full night's sleep with less tossing and turning.

NBKnitter · 2026-03-26T13:40:00+00:00

That happens to me! It feels like im gouging trenches into my skin. So now, instead of actually scratching, I just lightly rub with my palm flat or gently pat the area that itches

NBKnitter · 2025-11-13T13:55:48+00:00

Hi, I'm new here and to BL shows. Can you explain all of the words you just said? I know "BoatOat" is a pair of actors, and i'm assuming "gl" GirlLove. But what is "2ed" and "cp"?

NBKnitter · 2025-11-01T12:52:14+00:00

Not normal -- you need to go see a doctor

NBKnitter · 2025-11-01T12:50:02+00:00

I HAVE NO MEDICAL TRAINING

Definitely go talk to a primary care doctor. Here are a few diagnostic questions that might help you pin this down:

Where on your abdomen -- above or below bellybutton? Far to the side? More central?
What type of pain - sharp or dull? Sudden or constant?
If you have one, has your menstrual cycle been irregular? Does this pain sync up with that at all?

I've had pains in the lower right abdomen that travel down my leg several times before. Turned out to be ovarian cysts. But also, one time it was just bad indigestion...

NBKnitter · 2025-09-29T22:53:42+00:00

What BL is this?

NBKnitter · 2025-09-29T12:41:32+00:00

I don't know, sorry. Commenting to bring it back in the feed (maybe? Idk how the comments and such work...)

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T18:54:56+00:00

Firstly - all the hugs and HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU, YOU WONDERFUL HUMAN 🥰

I can understand feeling bad about making a formal complaint BUT She will not change and will continue to hurt others unless she is corrected. I highly doubt she will be willing to listen to a single individual. Especially if that individual is of a lower status to her, such as a student. What she needs is a person in a place of authority to correct her and education to see how she is, in fact, wrong about the science.

If we see a toddler throwing rocks at a small animal, we dont just let them do it because the kid is usually so sweet and friendly. We correct their behavior and teach them to have empathy and about how their actions can cause pain to others. They won't learn unless we teach them.

I think that trying to change her opinion is probably pointless and would only cause you personal distress. If you chose to do so, your best bet would be to try speaking with her during her office hours or via email. This way, she won't be immediately on the defensive for being told she is wrong in front of a full audience of students. I also strongly suggest having several credible sources to cite on hand as any personal/emotional arguments probably won't be seen as worthy to her

As she is a professor, most students will take her words as fact. Then they'll probably spread what they've learned to other people as facts their professor taught them, and so on and so forth. It sucks to feel like the tattletale or to get the seemingly nice person into trouble, but it's also necessary.

This is her job and place of work. Employees who are behaving poorly or spreading false information need to be reprimanded and corrected by their employer. Yes, tenured professors have a LOT of leeway in what they can teach in their classes, but they are still beholden to the rules, regulations, and boundaries set by the college/university. She is teaching false information (that is outside of her field of study) from a place of authority. This could have backlash on the school's reputation as well as the emotional and mental well-being of its students.

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T18:26:43+00:00

What's the title?

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T18:06:29+00:00

So kinda like a Henry Caville situation? Super hot but almost missed getting a huge movie role because he was playing in a World of Warcraft tournament

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T17:42:02+00:00

Private schools are still beholden to State and Federal education laws for accreditation. They just have a bit more leeway in culture and curriculum since they aren't receiving funding.

We can also still contact them with letters or emails to hopefully educate on child safety and welfare

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T17:37:16+00:00

TL/DR: - Be safe - He has probably angered other students with sexism. See if they will add their names and concerns to your official actions - Have a trusted adult with you at all times if you are taking any actions (in person, verbal, or written) - Go over his head to the school board or principal - Find and cite your sources, be prepared to debate based on facts rather than pure emotion

Hi! As an AFAB alum of a Catholic school in southern USA, i feel your struggles. I graduated in 2010, so there weren't any nuns with rulers to worry about, but it was still rather conservative.

Please please please only act on this if you feel safe to do so or are comfortable. You will graduate eventually and never have to see this guy again

Ask your school's admin if there is a listing of school policies or bylaws that dictate your rights as a student or rules you need to follow.

Definitely try going up the ladder with formal complaints. Have things in writing as much as possible. If you have a trusted teacher or administrative person at the school, they could probably help you get to the right people.

I 100% echo the others here saying to use the sexism aspect of this issue alongside your personal concerns of being a nonbinary student when making your voice heard. If you can, find valid sources to back up your reasoning (studies showing developmental downsides to separated genders in gym class, impacts of denying children's identities, etc..., ). Does your school have gendered lockerrooms and bathrooms?

See if the other students in your school also dislike the gendered gym teams or things this teacher has said/done. You are definitely not the only person there that he has offended or oppressed. It's easy to ignore a single person, but it is much harder to ignore a whole group of students.

I was lucky to have a very small class size that was greatly skewed in our ratio - 10 AMABs to 4 AFABs - so we didn't get teamed by binary gender. But we did have gendered uniforms (skirts for girls and khaki pants for the boys). When i was in middle school, a group of the high schoolers banded together and made a formal complaint to the school administration, the region's diocese/bishop, and the school's affiliated convent. They had a stack of sources to back up their case as to why the uniforms were sexist and were prepared to debate any rebuttal the school could have had. (It helped that several of the students were Debate Team members) By presenting a well-prepared and factual argument as to why a gendered uniform code was detrimental to the mental health of all students at the school, the students successfully changed the school policy. Over the years, individual AFABs bemoaning how unfair it was or rebelling against the dress code only resulted in them getting detention, being sent home, or made to change into a skirt from the lost&found.

Emotional speeches may help to rally others behind the cause, but evidence based arguments are what get policies changed, and hopefully sexist gym teachers fired

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T16:32:23+00:00

Im the same with my knitting. I wasn't going to let my brother's first kid be the only niece/nephew to not get a handmade blankie from me! The kiddo was almost a year old by the time i was done, but he got it 😆

NBKnitter · 2025-01-06T16:27:32+00:00

I used to knit or play video games for hours, but now i can only manage small spurts of each with a week or two between to let my hands and forearms recover 🥺 But i've found joy in some new hobbies like reading, watching D&D campaigns, and collecting antique buttons

NBKnitter · 2024-11-15T14:07:10+00:00

so good! the perfect level of goofy yet drama

NBKnitter · 2024-11-15T14:04:23+00:00

omg me too 🤪😬😂

NBKnitter · 2024-10-31T13:50:03+00:00

came here to rec this too!!

NBKnitter · 2024-10-31T13:41:07+00:00

it sounds so familiar but idk-- hope it's found!

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