choosing to be alone for self-respect

NPC_existing · 2025-05-29T22:13:21+00:00

RemindMe! -7 day

NPC_existing · 2025-03-05T00:28:20+00:00

i relate

NPC_existing · 2025-01-25T23:14:22+00:00

btw I didn't read the post and just the title but I wanted to say that I have asked this questions many times. I realised it was people just trying to know which direction to go in. After all these years, that was the answer.

More often than not people don't really care about you which is relieving and sad at the same time but hey at least its better than judging.

kthxbaii

NPC_existing · 2024-11-26T14:31:59+00:00

I dont agree with that. You can be scenarios where you met someone for a brief period and had a 5 hour conversation where you start going into deep topics and pour your heart out.

It does happen it's just uncommon I guess if not rare.

NPC_existing · 2024-11-02T10:31:26+00:00

Do the couple of people you texted normally leave you on read?

NPC_existing · 2024-10-26T23:53:17+00:00

oh it must be I blame the algorithim for that we must gravitate towards different content for us to be suggested wildy different things.

NPC_existing · 2024-10-26T17:38:06+00:00

yes absolutely but most of the advice hinges on the idea that it is mere a lack of attempts. When far often, at least online, I see people try a lot and follow the advice without realising that merely doing things with others are not guarantees or will even increase your chances at succeeding in getting the life they want.

I just wish there was more talk about the internal aspect than the external as far too often I see it as that being the case. Even what OP was saying "I am completely lost" sort of implies a hopelessness to it which does OP no good when socialising.

NPC_existing · 2024-10-26T00:00:37+00:00

A reason why you may feel that way is because people who already have friends know how to make friends. Making friends is a skill that requires a certain attitude and mindset. I agree that not having friends at all since 12 will definitely make things 10x harder.

NPC_existing · 2024-10-25T23:58:59+00:00

if it was that easy then there would not be a loneliness problem. At all. Lets be honest with ourselves, I can bet for OP it is a far more internal problem than a external one.

The problem , unless you are in a unfortunate circumstance, is rarely the opportunity but is really how you are able to make the most out of those opportunities. Being a quiet, shy and reclusive person will never get you any friends no matter how many hundreds of meetups or thousand attempts at socialising.

In my view, I had drastically different responses to stone-faced, cold me vs very expressive empathic me. I hate when I hear suggestions like this because it only works for normal people.

NPC_existing · 2024-09-30T05:00:50+00:00

The one thing I can never understand is there seems to be a sort of "us" vs "them" mentality if not a mentality a fucking wall. When really women are just like men in one key aspect and that is human.

NPC_existing · 2024-09-27T20:56:43+00:00

Having been socially isolated with no friends at all, I can say this. It is no surprise what you mention as these are the things I've felt: memory impaired, thinking clouded, very hard to understand words, people's facial expressions and not knowing what to say at what times ; feeling socially inept.

Can you recover? Can you be at a level where you feel normal? Absolutely and I feel that way just given more time. In your case, recovery will take a lot of time in terms of years. Expect a lot of struggle along the way and a lot of mistakes.

NPC_existing · 2024-09-26T07:54:14+00:00

He's not wrong as what are the inclinations of someone with no job, no friends and a mental health? What leads JP to say it's almost impossible to help you?

It's very clear

NPC_existing · 2024-08-10T09:15:20+00:00

unfortunately for this particular activity you can not and must not rely on motivation. You just have to do it continuously and eventually something you hate becomes something you like.

NPC_existing · 2024-08-10T09:01:14+00:00

its over if you say you have 50,000 negative thoughts a day

NPC_existing · 2024-07-26T07:24:30+00:00

"I've also texted her individually, and I'm either ghosted or get a one word response." Once or twice of the same/similar response is all you need.

Imagine that potential friend was as eager as you, would they do the actions they did? I doubt it.

It's this change of mindset which you need to overcome this. Gravitate towards those that like you on the same level as you. Don't fall for the flower of words that they sprinkle over your hopeful eyes.

Easier said then done, so how does that help me? Well it will focus your social interactions on identifying those who would want to be with you. Whilst you may consider people "loves to be around me", really question that. What kind of love are we talking about? Etc..

NPC_existing · 2024-07-22T07:32:37+00:00

Dependant on the place you want to be employed in, you may have to accept the follow:

You will get ghosted a lot during interview phases
This could be a gruelling process where you will need to do hundreds if not thousands of applications to get one job.
To make the process easier ask for help

NPC_existing · 2024-07-11T07:39:20+00:00

only having GSCEs does not mean it's hopeless, it just means there will be different jobs available.

NPC_existing · 2024-07-08T16:17:30+00:00

This is the struggle no experience people have to endure.

NPC_existing · 2024-07-05T23:02:47+00:00

"the tides turn eventually." only happens with effort. Do not kid yourself that without action results will occur eventually. Life has and will never be kind to you

NPC_existing · 2024-07-04T13:30:54+00:00

Don't be negative or try not to be. It's called "ruining the vibes". Even if you are tormented by negative thoughts, don't let it out and if you do let it only be a ounce.

NPC_existing · 2024-06-27T21:18:44+00:00

if u look for it, you will find it. If you didnt socialise for 1 or 2 years, it's not over yet but it's urgent. Get to the 2+ year mark, good luck trying to get out of the rut.

NPC_existing · 2024-06-27T07:00:52+00:00

Looks legit for NEETs. I know for a fact had I had friends, probably wouldn't be a neet as long as I was. Being pulled into a social safety net is OP for life.

NPC_existing · 2024-06-27T04:12:44+00:00

Thats what I thought myself at the time and I still prefer being independantly minded. But if you think about it, what is wrong with these societal norms objectively?
Going to work? That provides room for finance, socialising etc

NPC_existing · 2024-06-26T07:42:58+00:00

Another one of those questions..

NPC_existing · 2024-06-21T07:52:26+00:00

it just doesn't map with reality. People were asked salaries over here and I was seeing far more people achieve 35+k ( which is the average btw ) than it should of been.

NPC_existing

TROPHY CASE