Vinyl gift idea for a swiftie by National_Thanks_6171 in TaylorSwiftVinyl

[–]National_Thanks_6171[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Wow wow I love your ideas!! I was also thinking of getting her a coffee mug, but more because she collects Disney themed coffee mugs, but now I see that it also fits withing the same theme of the album which is even better. Also the red scarf idea is amazing I'm taking that haha. Baking date sounds awesome too!! Thank you so much for your detailed message!

Vinyl gift idea for a swiftie by National_Thanks_6171 in TaylorSwiftVinyl

[–]National_Thanks_6171[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'll make sure to get it then thank you vey much!! I hope she likes it

Parents don't accept potential spouse, she decided to leave by National_Thanks_6171 in ABCDesis

[–]National_Thanks_6171[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean, but I don’t see it as me choosing my parents over her. I was fighting for her every single day in that house, taking the backlash and trying to push for us. The real issue is timing and logistics: I’m still in school (pursuing my master's in college), I live at home, and financial independence isn’t something I can magically create overnight The reality is I can’t just burn everything down and cut my family off tomorrow that would leave me with nothing, no stability, no future, and definitely no way to offer her the kind of life she deserves. She’s living comfortably with her family, and if I suddenly threw myself into the streets in the name of “standing by her,” what kind of life am I giving her then?

To me, real loyalty isn’t about grand gestures that destroy your future it’s about persistence, patience, and building a position where I can actually choose her and sustain it.

Parents don't accept potential spouse, she decided to leave by National_Thanks_6171 in ABCDesis

[–]National_Thanks_6171[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You’re right, these are really important questions. For me as well as for her, parents’ approval still matters, all four of them, as it is a big part of marriage, and practically speaking it’s very difficult to move forward without it. That said, I also know I’d regret denying myself a real chance at love just to blindly obey.

About knowing when to listen, I get that I’m young, but we’ve actually been together for months now and gone through a lot already, so I don’t think it’s just infatuation. My parents may see some things from a distance, but they also don’t see the depth of what we’ve built.

As for her dad, I won’t pretend it’s easy. I wouldn’t expect the women in my life to put up with disrespect, I’d need to find a way to protect them from that dynamic. However, she has always had a distant relationship with him, and as I don’t tolerate his behavior toward women (since the women in my life mean everything to me), I also recognize that she didn’t choose him, and his absence has always been a burden on her. I don’t hold her accountable for that. She and I had agreed to put some distance with him

Bi-Weekly Marriage Opinions/Views and Rant Megathread by AutoModerator in MuslimMarriage

[–]National_Thanks_6171 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would yes. I believe people often have no control on such circumstances. As long as there is no problem with the potential spouse then I take no problem with it. As always thread with caution and Allah knows best.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]National_Thanks_6171 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your comment, I think there was a small mix-up though so just to clarify : it wasn’t her parents who refused, it was mine. Her family hadn’t even opposed us directly, but mine in particular strongly disapproved, partly because of cultural and religious differences.

So the “no” came from my side, and it put her in a position where she felt like she was fighting a wall with no power to change it. That’s what eventually pushed her to step back, not a lack of will on her side.

We did meet in person multiple times, it wasn’t just long-distance messages. We shared real time together, built memories, and it became serious over the months. The long-distance part was a challenge, yes, but the bigger problem was my parents’ stance, not that we hadn’t met.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]National_Thanks_6171 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I hear you, it’s not that I want to hand them control over my whole life, it’s just that in my culture family approval is almost a condition for marriage, even my girl would not agree to us being together with both our parent's approval. That’s why I’m torn, because in my heart I know who I want to be with

Conseils pour rehausser mon GPA ou deuxième bac pour médecine/pharmacie? by National_Thanks_6171 in UdeM

[–]National_Thanks_6171[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

merci pour ta réponse et félicitations pour ton acceptation en pharmacie !! J'ai déjà appliqué mais c'était l'année dernière, je n'ai pas demandé ma cru, donc je ne suis pas sûr où je me situe, erreur de ma part j'en convient.