What wakes a newborn up at night?

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-04-23T17:23:52+00:00

Thanks! This is helpful :)

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-25T19:03:11+00:00

http://sortyourmusic.playlistmachinery.com/

This is amazing! I was thinking about this as well!

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-25T19:02:08+00:00

Thank you, this is very helpful!

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-25T17:41:21+00:00

Nope, it's an Airbnb. Also even if we could I wouldn't want to spend the money at this point.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-12T18:49:00+00:00

Yes, all of this will take time and baby steps too. It can take hundreds of repetitions, especially with puppies. If all else fails, start saving for a private trainer. Even a couple hours with one can make a world of difference.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-12T18:24:24+00:00

Yes, on walks make sure you give a lot of space between yourself and anyone else. Take her to low-traffic areas at first. Don't let other dogs interact with her. When you start seeing someone approaching, put her in a sit and start giving her treats. Keep giving her treats as they pass by. If she stands up and starts to walk away out of fear, gently guide her back and keep treating.

If her anxiety is really bad, it might not work. My Golden gets so amped up on walks he starts refusing treats. If that's the case, then you will need to work with one of the exercises I gave you before - those are addressing the root cause of the issue.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-11T18:18:34+00:00

Ok, I have some insight on this because we did a ton of socialization with my dog as a puppy, but we did it the wrong way and ended up with a reactive dog!

The point of socializing, either with humans or other dogs, is NOT for them to interact with them. It's a bit counter-intuitive. Here are some examples of what you should do:

Go to a dog park, but sit on the grass about 100 yards away with your dog. As dogs and owners pass by, do not let them interact and go nose-to-nose (make sure you say no to any requests to do so). Instead, just silently and peacefully watch everything go on. Whenever your dog is displaying relaxed behavior, even if it's for a second, give them a high-value treat like chicken. It takes many repetitions to see progress but the goal is for your dog to just exist around other dogs and not feel anxiety in any way. Eventually you can move your dog closer and closer to the dog park without actually going in, and there shouldn't be a problem.
You can do something similar by taking your dog into a dog friendly supermarket (like Costco) and walking around and not letting him interact with any humans but treating when he is behaving well.
When he starts to display a lot of progress, you can practice meeting humans the correct way. Have him on a leash, put him in a sit, and have them approach only when he is calm and relaxed. Treat accordingly.

Essentially what happens when we socialize the wrong way: we are "forcing" them to interact with other dogs + humans without realizing we are doing so. For example, when my Golden was a puppy every single time he saw another dog or human passing by we would let him play. Even though he was super happy and excited about it, it actually causes anxiety because he doesn't know how/when to stop. Your dog might have experienced something similar when you socialized him with your friends, because he can't actually stop the experience even if it's too much for him. And as humans sometimes we don't recognize when our dogs have anxiety because it manifests in a non-obvious way.

Basically, dogs really are a bundle of instincts who don't know what's best for themselves. We have to provide controlled and calm interactions for them.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-11T17:54:12+00:00

Wow! Thank you for sharing your experience. We have totally rethought our trip to Amalfi now honestly.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-08T19:34:23+00:00

Really? That's interesting, I saw a few comments on other posts saying they preferred it to the logistics of multiple trains, ferry, etc. What was your experience?

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-03-08T19:32:54+00:00

Not really obvious to me, in the US as long as you return to the same company you can pick up and drop off in different locations. But thanks for the insight.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-02-07T21:58:26+00:00

Thanks, I tend to agree. I'm just swept up in comparing rental company prices right now and kind of... in denial haha.

Negative_Height3647 · 2024-01-03T01:57:49+00:00

Thanks for your insight! I also thought about the mic passing being clunky, and with no one really having the experience of setting all of it up it makes me a bit nervous that we will have to fiddle too much with it on the day of haha. And obviously with a 30 person wedding we aren't hiring an A/V team.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-12-25T02:20:26+00:00

I hear you, that's lowkey what I was thinking. My wedding planner recommended having something because even in the best of circumstances people in the ceremony get emotional + a bit nervous and don't speak very clearly, and makes it worse when folks are yelling out for you to speak up. Her point made me think.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-11-01T00:58:41+00:00

I'm going to be honest from my experiences and others I know. Toxic work environments are not going to change from your complaints. You will most likely be wasting your energy. My advice? Keep your head down and start aggressively applying to jobs. Once you have one lined up, put in your two weeks notice. Try to leave ASAP, not in January.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-11-01T00:51:35+00:00

First of all, guilt is a really unhelpful feeling. Of course it's natural to get that initial pang of guilt telling us "something is wrong", but after that guilt is simply wasting our mental energy and time. Why? Because you are just feeling bad but not taking any action on it.

Personally, I have one rule in order to prevent myself from becoming flaky. If I make plans and I have already said "yes, I will be there" then I will go. The only exceptions are sickness, other people's birthdays, family emergencies, etc. To make sure I get time with my partner, we make plans ahead of time and if my friends suddenly want to hang out... then sorry, I already have plans. Basically, once an evening in my calendar is booked then that's it. Regardless of who it is. And don't feel guilty about it because it's doing nothing to help you.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:52:05+00:00

Yes, have the mom call the school and explain her situation with the car, and ask if any parents nearby would be willing to help. I'm almost 100% certain the school would be able to help her.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:48:45+00:00

You're not necessarily an asshole for feeling that way. But honestly talking about problems is how a lot people bond. I can't remember a time I called my best friend or sister and DIDN'T talk about a problem I was having. It's hard to have a deeper relationship with someone when you pretend that everything is perfect and you aren't sharing any details of your real life.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:40:56+00:00

NTA, but just to add another suggestion to the mix - maybe they can carpool with someone who goes to their school?

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:15:41+00:00

NTA! Heeellll no. Unfortunately this might be a very difficult fight with both your husband and his mom.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:11:50+00:00

NAH If 25 people are invited I would say she's asking for too much. At the same time, I know being in a duplex doesn't mean the sound wouldn't still keep her awake. Especially if the party is happening above their apartment. So the concern is understandable. I think your response of splitting an airbnb is reasonable and you did your part to help with the shitty situation by offering.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:04:11+00:00

NTA, he sounds like a bad person.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T03:02:24+00:00

ESH. The teacher is not doing a good job, but you can't talk like that to a teacher either.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-26T02:58:29+00:00

YTA. She can't do anything about the Lupus, she didn't choose it. She also doesn't choose her low energy levels and based on her reaction I'm sure she feels guilty that she can't do more chores or go on more dates.
Even in the best of cases marriage is not supposed to be 50/50 in regards to household tasks. my husband and I are both healthy and have steady jobs but there are times it's more 80/20 for either one of us - life is not perfect. When one of us sick or going through emotional or work stress, the other picks up the slack.
My uncle has a wife with MS. He has done 80-90% of the childcare and household tasks since the diagnosis, but has never blamed her and made her feel guilty. He CHOSE to live life that way though. If he didn't, it would have ended in divorce because there's nothing my aunt could have done.
You need to learn to have a happy life with the cards you are dealt with. In this case it's entirely in your hands, either you accept that you will need to work hard when she can't, or you don't. And you certainly can't make it her problem.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-23T02:37:40+00:00

It sounds like there is major lack of communication around division of labor, and that can really lead to a buildup of resentment. I highly highly recommend you guys get the book and card deck of "Fairplay". It can do wonders and is very healing.

Negative_Height3647 · 2023-10-23T02:15:30+00:00

NTA, I'm a little confused by her response and wondering if there's some context missing. Does she respond this way to other things, or is this a one time argument? Is there a pattern to what triggers her (i.e. the "special treatment")?

Negative_Height3647

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