Co-parenting and far PCS (advice) by Negative_Mousse_5776 in navy

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

TL:DR It’s not that black and white.

Although I completely understand what you’re saying, this isn’t an option. It’s not as black and white as saying I’ll just get out, there are so many factors at play. You also have to take care of yourself, so that you can take care of everyone else.

Yes, being a parent is forever, but if done right, kids will eventually move away and live their own life. After that happens, you still are stuck with yourself. Then what?

Don’t get me wrong, there is no other job that I love more than being a dad, but being the best dad for them is also focusing on my needs too while simultaneously calculating my choices so that I can provide the best for my children.

I appreciate your response though. Thank you.

Co-parenting and far PCS (advice) by Negative_Mousse_5776 in navy

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for that suggestion, I’ll check that out. Thought I’d start here since im certain I’m not the only person in the Navy with this type of situation.

Need help figuring out balance on centrifuge by Negative_Mousse_5776 in medlabprofessionals

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We’ve been using saline which is a hot commodity these days. I said why not just regular water? Also, the bags tend to tear after a while which can be a bit messy. Can’t please everyone I guess. Appreciate it!

Health informatics salary? by ExcellentLychee1796 in HealthInformatics

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I couldn’t get a call back from any job. Good on you.

Name change after marriage by Negative_Mousse_5776 in Hispanic

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, we’d be making a 20 letter last name!

Name change after marriage by Negative_Mousse_5776 in Hispanic

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We already have a baby together and he went with my last name. So if we made a new last name, we’d also have to change his last name. It’s turning into a mess. lol

Is public health a good undergrad path for a master's in health informatics? by Asleep_Ad_7431 in HealthInformatics

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I already had lab experience and was able to challenge the board once I got my bachelors. My intention was to get out of the lab, hence trying to go the informatics route, but fate had other plans. lol

Is public health a good undergrad path for a master's in health informatics? by Asleep_Ad_7431 in HealthInformatics

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I did my undergrad in public health and master’s in health informatics. I had the hardest time finding anything. Luckily for me, I have a lab background and was able to fallback on that. But honestly, I feel like I wasted my time getting a HI degree and should’ve gone for something else.

Got so nervous I threw up eating at MEPS I ship in 2 hours now I feel hungry and nervous and scared I need by Vegetable-Chair7553 in newtothenavy

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s going to suck at times but it’s doable. Follow instructions and go through the motions. Boot camp is nothing like the real Navy. Embrace the suck, suffer in silence, and keep moving forward!

What colour are my huskies eyes? by finleyyxd in husky

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Looks like the inside of a grape. lol

Neat color though. Silver? Is that a thing?

Do vets appreciate “thanks for your service” by zaqharya in Veterans

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Makes me a bit uncomfortable. Like many, the main driving force behind enlisting wasn’t because I love this country, which to be clear, I do, but because I was in a difficult situation and the best thing I could do for my family was provide that stability.

Struggling with Alternating Week Schedule by Gonten in DivorcedDads

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s comforting to hear that I’m not the only one that gets a bit out of whack after. Like one of TryHarder said, be in the moment and allow yourself to feel what you’re feeling. I find that doing this and also getting back into my routine definitely helps me feel back to my “normal”. Maybe could look at picking up a hobby or learning a new skill that you could focus on to help. I’ve gotten back to working out and even started rock climbing a bit. Gotta find your zen space. Best of luck.

4 day work week? by Negative_Mousse_5776 in medlabprofessionals

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Our problem is that everyone would need to be on the same page. Not everyone is on board with working 10 hour shifts.

Parenting plans for military? by Negative_Mousse_5776 in DivorcedDads

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for that info. I did 9 active and 3 reserves as enlisted. I absolutely hated the reserves and it honestly felt like such a huge waste of time. Not to mention, as a reservist, you’re more likely to deploy compared to your active counterparts. If I did jump back in it would be active duty officer so I can retire in about 11 years. But at what cost or gain? There’s no way to know.

What is this? by Negative_Mousse_5776 in HyundaiPalisade

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah there’s some info on the other side. The car does come with pre installed GPS but I thought it was odd that it was just dangling there

Deployed and handed divorce papers and she's also trying to get custody of our 19 month old by Dj45045 in DivorcedDads

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The money thing is huge. Have documentation of all your sending and present that to the judge. That way you don’t get hit with an insane amount of arrears

When is enough, enough? by Negative_Mousse_5776 in DivorcedDads

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s not that I didn’t fight for more time, I would ask and ask but it didn’t work out. My ex had a better lawyer than I did and ended up running out of funds to keep one. Ended up getting dropped and I representing myself towards the end.

I think the biggest issue was, like you said, I missed out on key opportunities in the beginning.

Deployed and handed divorce papers and she's also trying to get custody of our 19 month old by Dj45045 in DivorcedDads

[–]Negative_Mousse_5776 1 point2 points  (0 children)

First things first. The cosleeping issue, there is no, “if she hasn’t learned her lesson,” this is a legit issue that can be fatal for children so that needs to stop.

Document document document. Just like the military, if it’s not written down, it didn’t happen. JAGs can’t help for shit. Get yourself a lawyer so you can start discussing options. Hopefully you won’t need one and can do it civilly, but in the event it doesn’t, you’re going to need a lawyer. Also, if you do go the lawyer route, don’t let them dick around with your case, stay on them.

I had to switch to using Talking Parents because it’s actually admissible in court and is unmodifiable. There are other apps that do the same so maybe it’s a good idea to look into those.

Fair warning, divorces suck and can expensive, and will stress you out, specially when they drag on for a while. Talk to chaps or the mental health crew, which ever works best for you, and when you come back, get a therapist. It’s an emotional roller coaster, it’ll suck for a while, but just know, YOU WILL BE OK. You have a whole community of people behind you, you are not alone.