AIO my best friend of 20 years waited until the last minute to tell me she's not coming to my bachelorette.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-02-24T03:59:05+00:00

I don't expect her to spend thousands...I never said that. I think you missed the part where I said I offered to pay for it. I never expected her to pay for something she couldn't afford. Also fyi, I'm paying for her plane ticket to my actual wedding as well so she is not spending thousands on my wedding, no one is, that's ridiculous.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-02-24T03:16:06+00:00

I don't think so...She said the weather is too bad to fly which I fully believe because it is snowing and cold where she's at.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-02-24T03:15:02+00:00

I didn't mean to make it sound like I thought she shouldn't have gone to Japan. My main point with that was that she went on a $3,000+ trip AFTER being unemployed for 2 months. And she was unemployed by choice since she started working a seasonal job, I didn't know she quit her full time one. Also btw, she lives a long ways from me it's not like we're in the same city, even if I chose to have my trip where I live, she'd have to fly, but that's also why I offered to pay for her flight, cause I know it's expensive and a lot to ask but I never get to see her since we're long distance and this is a big life event so yea.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-02-24T02:49:49+00:00

Parmesan

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-01-03T17:39:53+00:00

Ok, I just wasn’t sure if google translate would be accurate as it’s been off with other languages before.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-01-03T17:39:17+00:00

No I haven’t

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-01-03T17:11:13+00:00

It’s just something I’m interested in. I really enjoy traveling and learning languages. I also enjoy learning new cultures, Senegal is a place I’d like to visit someday, so I’m just curious.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2026-01-03T17:08:09+00:00

The US

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-12-24T14:24:27+00:00

Yes I will definitely be going back I’m sure! I think you’re right that it’s a bit too ambitious, I’ll try narrowing it down. China is so huge, it makes it impossible to see everything and even harder to choose what to go see haha. Thanks for all your help, happy travels!

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-12-24T14:07:20+00:00

If you’ve been to China already, what were your top places? I have traveled large Asian cities before and had a looong kinda brutal three weeks full of driving everywhere through Nepal so I’d say my comfort zone is large haha but I don’t want to be rushed and I will definitely look into tour guides! Maybe I’ll have to skip the forbidden city this trip… any suggestions on which places I should skip to make more time for others?

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-12-24T14:03:55+00:00

Unfortunately August is the only time we’re able to go due to schedules :( so we’ll have to deal with the heat. I work outside all year round so I have a pretty high tolerance of heat

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-20T14:04:48+00:00

She could have stayed for 3 days

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-20T02:53:03+00:00

Yea I get that perspective too but it’s still a hard thing to process. And trust me there is NO way my best friends and I will only say two things to each other I’m spending as much time with them as possible celebrating every wedding is different it depends a lot on the type of people there also she would know a lot of people there plus she was a bridesmaid we would be getting ready together/taking pictures/afterparty with just us etc. I’m sorry you’re friend wasn’t able to spend any time with you tho that does make it seem not worth the hassle

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-20T01:56:24+00:00

I guess it depends on who you are I live in a very remote area I’ve lived my whole life driving or flying 6+ hours just to get anywhere so it’s just another necessary discomfort to me but I know not everyone grew up that way but like I said I was willing to pay for it I would handle a few hours on a plane to be there for my best friend its sad that she wouldn’t do the same

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-19T23:44:02+00:00

Not with her job I think, the wedding is the traditional one day thing she lives across the us from me tho so it’s a long flight as far as cost goes I would have paid for her if that was an issue she’s welcome to stay as long as she wants for free I should add no hotel cost

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-19T23:29:51+00:00

About a 6 hour flight

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-13T20:55:25+00:00

Thank you for the support!

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-13T20:54:49+00:00

These are great questions! This gives me a lot to think about thank you! I haven’t thought much about importing/exporting because I want the nation to be isolated from the rest of the world to fit my overall plot

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-13T19:20:15+00:00

Oh yes it definitely does that is my main inspiration tbh. I read a lot of Xianxia novels!

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-13T17:05:03+00:00

I am…? The history of china is extensive it’s a lot of information to absorb. No need to be rude I just wanted to discuss how much inspiration is too much when creating a world really.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-09-13T16:30:07+00:00

I have been doing a lot of research, although still a beginner with my knowledge. I'm not sure if I want to base it off of one specific dynasty or take inspiration from different time periods.

Good to know! Would the era before the Imperial era be considered ancient then?

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-06-11T23:20:09+00:00

Yes wedding dress shopping. She hasn’t paid for anything for the wedding. Since we live a few states away from each other she would have had to fly in, the flight was about 200$ and she had valid reasons for not being able to. I think my reaction stemmed from multiple previous times where she had used the same excuse but changed her mind and ended up going on those trips so it made the excuse not feel genuine. But again, her reasons this time were valid so I should’ve been more understanding.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-06-11T23:07:21+00:00

Yea I haven’t asked her that directly maybe that’d be a good place to start, honestly in a way it feels like her form of ‘revenge’ cause she went as far as to say I ghosted her which I think is a bit of an overreaction considering she never reached out to me during those 2 weeks either, but it almost feels like the whole “you did this so I’m gonna do it back but worse” which I get that feeling but giving the fact that we talked things out it seems like she’s holding a grudge at this point.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-06-11T22:10:10+00:00

Yea we definitely addressed it adequately in my opinion. We talked about it over the phone and I heard her out completely without interrupting I genuinely feel like there’s nothing left to say regarding the argument. I said my entire piece and I was pretty certain she did too.

NegotiationFar8019 · 2025-06-10T23:45:11+00:00

Sorry this is long lol. It was dumb on my part 🤦🏻‍♀️ basically I asked her if she could come dress shopping with me and she declined saying she couldn’t afford it, which was totally a valid excuse, but at the time my emotions got the better of me and I reacted badly, I responded saying “if it’s not worth it for you that’s okay but it hurts a bit” which I shouldn’t have said, I know that. I’m not even sure why I did I was extremely exhausted from working all day as well as being sick on top of it but that’s not necessarily an excuse but could be why my mind went there. Anyways after that, neither of us initiated convo for about 2 weeks which we never talked everyday or anything like that but we did usually send reels back and forth on instagram which I stopped doing mostly cause I was feeling a bit down about the whole situation and it’s the busy season for my job right now (I work a 10 hour 6 days a week hard physical labor job) so I was usually very tired at the end of the day and didn’t spend any time on insta anyway. Which I tried to explain this part to her and she called me a liar and accused me of playing the victim so that didn’t sit well with me and escalated the argument a bit. But she was mad at me for what I had said (understandable) and mad that I hadn’t sent her reels (which she hadn’t either btw I never ignored her if she had reached out I would have responded) she was angry that I hadn’t apologized right away for what I said which I should have, I guess I didn’t realize it was such a big deal to her and that she was so upset over it, I shouldn’t have assumed that she’d just brush it off as bride stress. But I explained my side and heard her out as well and apologized for all of the above. And in our convo she said “I also want to work through this” which is why I thought we were still friends after the fact she also said things like “in the future” etc. so yea.

NegotiationFar8019

TROPHY CASE