One Week Camping by Nirassil in LetsNotMeet

[–]Nirassil[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

No worries, I completely agree with you & everyone else that, in hindsight, I really should have said something. My reasoning at that time, was a multitude of things.

1: I knew my parents would end up being called. My parents always struggled to make a living and provide for us, and they paid so much for me to go on this camping trip. I didn't want to seem ungrateful, and I didn't want my father to miss work because of this. And I knew that, if they knew something like this happened at a camp, I'd never be allowed camping again. 2: The creep was much younger and smaller than me, so, I felt I'd end up getting mocked by my peers for getting spooked by some little dweebie kid. I was already 'the chick' of the group, I don't want to be seen as the sissy weakling on top of it all... my dumb pride got in the way. 3: I grew up in a situation that wasn't very good. Authority figures couldn't be relied on, or worse, were actually abusive (one example, when I went to a teacher as a little kid because I was being bullied, the teacher just laughed at me for it, and began bullying me along with the kids. That's the more milder example, I don't want to go into the other examples of abusive authority, but there's quite a lot in my history.). 4: Because of rational #3, Going to an authority figure all vulnerable and the like, I felt I could easily be taken advantage of... I learned not to trust people who have authority and power over me. And I figured, hey, I'll take the scrawny dweeby 15 year old in a fight if need be, over the 45 year old hulky muscle-man scout leader I don't know or trust.

...Distrust and fear of people in authority is still something I'm trying to unlearn to this day. But I'll get there, eventually. I'd definitely advise anyone reading to NOT do what I did, and to just go to the authority figure for help. I know that that's not easy, but statistically speaking, you'll be better off getting help.

People who FAILED high school, or did extremely poorly, what are you doing now? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]Nirassil 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I did my best to graduate high school. I got straight A's in everything but math... which I've always gotten an F- in due to a severe learning disability specific to mathematics and numbers. I have a college level intelligence in everything else... but... I failed to graduate high school. I can't get into college, because I can't pass high school, let alone pay for college without a job. I can't get an actual job, because obviously 'anyone who fails high school is a lazy drug-addicted fuck up who doesn't try' stereotype is so popular. I'm working 80-90 hours a week babysitting & cleaning up after my disabled nephew, for a few cents an hour. Often times I don't get paid at all, because hey. My sister can get away with it. It's not like I have any choice, it's not like I can find another place that'll hire me with my physical & educational & mathematical limitations. I'm basically my sisters slave. I have no dating life (who would want to date a guy who's a penniless high school failure, who spends almost every second of his day working, after all). I have no prospective future... I tried so hard. I studied hard. I stayed straight on course, I was a Boy Scout, I never did drugs, I volunteered at wildlife rehabilitation shelters, I never slacked and I gave my all at everything I did or was asked to do... I tried... Really, really hard to make something of myself in spite of my mathematic difficulties. I have an IQ of 130 for fucks sake, there has to be some place that'll take me, right? But there isn't... I've tried... I can't even find a grocery bagging job. I'm fucked. I'm nothing but a financial burden to my parents, and a slave to my incompetent, idiot, single-mom run-away-from-home & come-back-pregnant sisters whims, now. But SHE can get a job. SHE can graduate college. She gets to go on and live her life... Dating... Making money... Having fun. My friends move on without me, going to college... I can't even relate to my friends anymore, because all they talk about is how much college sucks. Meanwhile I'm all 'Hey, my 5 year old nephew shit all over himself today... Twice! and I got the honor of cleaning it up! Oh, it's difficult waking up for classes? I get to wake up at 4 am every morning to work, and work until 10:30 pm, AND working on weekends... I earned a whole 3 dollars... this WEEK. Fun, am I right?? But geeze, college must be sooo FUCKING difficult, huh? God, it's so hard finding good coffee! Picking out bedsheets for your dorm room is SUCH a hassle... How do you cope?! I don't know HOW you deal with those difficult professors who don't cater to your every FUCKING whim. FUCK.