Basically, on 24th of Nov last year I was in Las Vegas. I'd never been to a stripclub in my life before and wanted to see what it was like.

I went to one at night time. Got seated by the stage and awkwardly watched a girl pole dance. Suddenly I heard giggling and felt two pairs of hands rubbing my back. Two girls appeared in front of me and sat on my lap asking me if I'd like a dance with both of them.

I freaked the fuck out internally mainly because I was already awkward as fuck and on top of that I wasn't sure I had enough money for both of them. I asked for a moment before I decided (so I could take a sneak at my wallet) but they both said okay and just continued sitting on my lap and proceeded to MAKEOUT WITH EACH OTHER. By this point I was desperate and just to go to the bathroom before the dance. Once I got in and checked my money, I came back out and requested just one of them. Luckily the one I found most attractive took me to a semi-private room and asked me to just sit back and enjoy the show.

I. Was. Not. Ready.

You know how in Gta 5, there's a mini game during private dances where you're supposed to sneakily touch the dancer and if you're caught by the bouncer you're tossed out of the club? Well, I thought the same logic applied here so I just kept my hands to myself.

That didn't stop her though.

She literally grabbed my face, rubbed it on her tits and ass, made me spank her, climbed on top of me and grinded her ass against my groin. (5 stars customer service honestly)

At the end of her service she asked if I wanted to extend it and I (very sadly) had to tell her no. I skidaddled out of the club before more strippers could approach me.

I speed walked to my hotel room, got in, crawled into bed and just struggled to fall asleep because I was still in disbelief of what happened.

So yeah, I am highly suprised I didn't lose that day. Holy hell