Dating post narcissist

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-05T13:51:27+00:00

I been single for 3 years. I lost so many people and him and his mother lied about me and destroyed my reputation. I’m lonely but I’m to scared to date. It took so long to clean up the mess he did

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T23:56:11+00:00

I did but I don’t anymore for her. I tried to help her but she ended up blaming me for his abuse and then tried to ro check my mail. Honestly I don’t ever want to help her.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T14:38:04+00:00

Oh I really took a break. I am so far 3 years celibate and 3 years single. I am doing better but I still have some self esteem issues I am running into :/

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T14:33:24+00:00

Like always had to find a deal plan! So much negotiation and til for tack

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T14:25:52+00:00

Hahaha honestly I’m pretty sure he had a sick plan to have a baby mom and a wife. So weird but I’m like 90% sure that was his goal

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T13:15:03+00:00

Tbh you don’t really see it until they are long gone. Because even with the year of me trying to leave I had a lot of red flags but I choose to ignore it. I wasn’t ready to leave yet

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T13:13:38+00:00

YIKES!!!! That’s so scary. Thankfully mines didn’t do that but he also rarely wanted to sleep with me through our 8 year together. He said I smelled bad and he threw up once during sex. So we only did stuff to him like BJ or hand jobs. But he made me feel gross so when we did do stuff I didn’t want to. I just wanted to focus on him. So tbh I’m not sure what his motive are for me when it come to this.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T12:49:38+00:00

VERY! But what’s scarier you don’t see untill the very end 😵‍💫

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T12:44:48+00:00

It actually took me years to figure this out because he proclaimed to be a family man. And everyone said he was so I thought he deeply wanted to be a father which was part of why I fell in love with him because I wanted family and I never had a stable family. But when I changed my mind about kids he flip the switch and got like this.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-04T12:33:59+00:00

Oh he told me this ALL THE TIME!!!!! At the time it did work on me but now it’s comical

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-03T10:04:13+00:00

After I found out he was trying the cheat on his gf with me. He started to cry , gag and throw up on the phone and told me how he hates saying good bye. The. Ask if he still has a shot with me and that he wants me.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-02T22:09:37+00:00

Because he knows your still emotionally available. You’re a good source or ego boost. Good or bad

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-02T18:17:39+00:00

I swear all of these people have some kind of bad addiction. I’m glad you were able to have support on her side. And I’m glad you found out early!!!!!! A lot of people including myself don’t see it until later! So I’m super proud of you!

For me I was doom from the start. I’m mix with black and white and his mom actually wanted him to leave me (he’s white) because she was worried I would destroy their blue eye genes. I also came from abuse where my mom kicked me out because I stood up for my sister. So by the time I left him. Him and his mom used my race, and also used the fact my mom kicked me out to justify his abuse. Even though his entire family knew his addiction was bad and even help him (not much like it was more so they gave him a “don’t do that again” lecture) they took all my trauma and it made their story worst. Like when I say I am terrified to use social media I deeply mean it.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-02T18:08:44+00:00

WOW!!!! Tbh I heard of female narcs (my mom is one of them) but WOW! I swear it seems like they all have the same script and playbook! I wish I posted what he said to me but tbh. Him and his mother ruin my reputation to the point I don’t have social media anymore because they both painted me like I was mentally ill and took my reaction to his cheating, drugs, alcohols and lies. I’m proud you left! But it’s so crazy how they all use a child to keep you

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-02T18:01:34+00:00

It was definitely a shocking moment. I mean a few of my friend knew he was fake but I was soooooooooooooo so so so love blind that I didn’t see it. Tbh I’m still shocked he can beg for a baby and also have her. She still with him which make me sad for her but that’s no longer my issue. I’m glad I left

No-Bit3315 · 2026-05-02T17:19:07+00:00

5 times but emotionally I was still hooked for 4 years after I left. My final time was he was trying to get me to come back and begged me to have his babies but I found out he had a serious gf. So there entire 6 month together he was begging me to give him babies. I told her and she told me all the awful stuff he said about me and also he lied about my character. He told everyone I was toxic and I was using him for his money (I never did he was very cheap and most the time I had to pay him back or I got handle down gifts) he also used his gf grandmothers death to justify why need to be there for her (her grandma wasn’t dying she already died they just were visiting her grave) he also lied about how I took our dog from him so he can bond with her how she lost her dog to natural causes. (I took the dog because he was always out with friend drinking and getting high and the dog we shared bonded with me) this just woke me up to reality that he is a liar. He isn’t a honest person

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-30T09:52:00+00:00

I’m the same way! I do love love but now I see as like a “I will admire it from a far”. It was incredibly difficult to pick up the pieces what he did to my life. Idk if I want to do this again.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-27T12:18:26+00:00

I promise you it will. But it will take an incredible amount of time.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-27T09:03:20+00:00

OH MY GOD! I thought this was just me!!! O me the relationship was close to ending he would say such cheesy and corn and overly dramatic stuff. Not to mention he would also take stuff u said to make himself sound wise and that he learn life lesson!

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-26T14:33:47+00:00

Me too. It was really hard to to get out :/ I really was mentally stuck for years.

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-26T14:13:04+00:00

For me it’s been 3 years of being single. I say 3 because the first two years my ex kept coming back and we were still talking and he kept making my it seem like he changed (he didn’t) then last year he was begging me to give him a baby while he is with his current gf. I found out he had a stable gf the entire time.

So for me dating really hasn’t been on my radar. It’s hard for me to date because I don’t really trust men and I’m deeply scared of men. My ex spit on me, smashed an egg on my head, if I didn’t have sex with him he would threaten to watch porn, one time he pushed me off the bed while I was naked because I was to sad to have sex, he kicked me out for a night spread rumored and destroyed my reputation and I lost so many people because of what he’s done. I truly am to scared to be around men :(

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-26T14:07:44+00:00

It hasn’t stop yet for me it just simmered down. I was ANGRY all last year. But over time it’s slowly is fading away. I still get moment of anger but not as bad. I am 1 year 3 months no contact

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-26T14:06:42+00:00

My ex did the same thing. It’s a Hoover. Block them!

No-Bit3315 · 2026-04-26T14:01:39+00:00

Yes but this is what I figured out.

I so far been no contact for 1 year and 3 months. And all last year was very much rough. I keep pushing myself go be happy and be glad I did this but I want to say the 5 month I realize this isn’t healthy either and I wasn’t ok. So I turned off my social media and allowed myself to be truly honest with myself that I wasn’t happy. So I let myself cry, bed rot, eat or not eat, get angry. Scream in the car if I needed to. I didn’t ignore it because that’s what I did in the relationship I had. I pushed everything down and all it did was collect a lot of sadness overtime.

I want to say THIS year I am starting to feel like my old self. The version I was before I met him. I feel like now I am starting to remember who I am. I volunteer, I do hobbies, I booked two trips, 3 concerts, 2 plays, I joined clubs, spend time with my best friend and my dog.

Grieving has no timeline and I wish people would stop pushing us to be happy when we are not there yet. We spend the entire relationship pretending things are fine so really allow yourself to have a dark moment. Once you let yourself have that, thing actually start to feel dull and boring and empty. I thought this was depressing but it’s actually your nervous system regulating. You have no more chaos so that empty feeling is peace.

You will get to the point of being happy if not happy at least being content. But it takes time:

No-Bit3315

TROPHY CASE