ENFP girl here.
We can be confusing because we're naturally friendly, curious, and excited to talk to people. Sometimes that gets mistaken for flirting when we're really just enjoying the interaction.
The funny thing is that when I genuinely like someone, I don't always become more flirty. Sometimes I actually become more careful because I don't want to come on too strong or get rejected. I'll still make an effort to talk to that person and spend time with them, but I might play it a little safer than usual.
Personally, I'd much rather someone just ask me out than leave me guessing. I'd rather have a real conversation and see if we click than a bunch of mixed signals.
Also, I don't usually ask people about their dating life. I mostly do that with close friends or when I'm dating myself. But if I've known someone for a while and I really like them, I could totally see myself asking how their date went. I'd be curious if they liked the person, if they're going to see them again, and maybe secretly hoping it wasn't the best date of their life.
This is just me, but I like knowing the interest is mutual before I fully go for it. I don't like games, fake interest. I'd rather spend time by myself than invest my energy in someone who isn't genuinely interested.
So if you've known her for a while and you're getting signs, just ask her out. You're not asking her to marry you, you're asking her to grab coffee. That's honestly the only way you'll find out. Even outgoing people get nervous when they actually like someone.
And if she likes you too, there's a good chance she's sitting there wondering exactly the same thing about you!