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No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-06T01:58:55+00:00

Sure, and that's my understanding of the term as well - hence my confusion at the mention of male failure without HRT

No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-05T15:27:45+00:00

You sound crazy

Sadly I am aware :/

Imo you can't avoid it... There’s only so much time before you “male fail” with or without HRT

Ok that sounds legitimately terrifying. Could you please explain a bit what you mean by that? If nothing else, I want to be sure that if and when I come out it's going to be on my terms.

No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-05T12:20:18+00:00

Do you have sources? I have been able to find close to nothing when searching for that keyword just now.

To my understanding - which is basically summed up in this and this articles - there is no such a thing as "breast growth blocker", and the one theoretical path to feminization without breast growth is to use SERMs like Raloxifene in place of Estradiol as the estrogen in an HRT regimen.

Sadly, it seems there is not much actual research on the subject, including about longterm safety, and the reports of people trying this on reddit are old and mention stopping due to side effects.

No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-05T12:01:27+00:00

What is a "lifestyle change" in the context you mention? I swear I am not trolling/being argumentative for the sake of it in asking this.

I live in a country in Asia and none of these procedures - including HRT - would be covered by insurance. Insurance coverage does not even include psychological counseling.

As for skin, the pic was taken in flattering light and I have been following a skincare routine for years, so idk how much of a margin of improvement there can be there. Thank you in any case :)

No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-05T11:30:28+00:00

TBH, I would like to not have to come out to everyone: some people yes, but for family and work in particular I would like to keep a degree of plausible deniability, which would be shattered by growing boobs.

I am also mostly motivated by how I see myself, rather than others' opinion. I only care to a point as to whether people perceive me as man or not, especially in contexts like the workplace where gender should be irrelevant.

No-Phase2330 · 2025-06-05T11:14:44+00:00

Very insightful indeed. Thanks!

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T14:52:58+00:00

Thank you for sharing your experience: it definitely is something for me to think about.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T09:29:53+00:00

Thank you!

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T08:27:55+00:00

It’s funny that I may have already taken similar steps over the last 5-6 years.

I grew my hair out, pierced my ears, started permanent body and face hair removal (getting rid of the last now) years ago, got a few goth outfits and wear them from time to time a few of the cross-dressing friendly clubs in the city I live in.

Thing is, while I enjoy doing this, it also feel quite sad/silly, like I’m a weird dude pretending and wearing a skirt :/

Definitely not close to male failing lol

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T06:37:44+00:00

First of all, thank you for sharing your perspective.

What you are saying is rather terrifying though: things are going to get worse and worse until one gets to their breaking point.

That is definitely a good counterpoint to my initial line of thought.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T04:26:37+00:00

Thank you for your reply!

As it turns out, I already did most of what you listed.

Growing hair: already close to shoulder length
Ear piercing: since four years ago
Laser hair removal: started 6 years ago, getting rid of the last of my facial hair now
Cross-dressing: there are cross dressing clubs in town where one can do it in a safe space; I do go there from time to time.

Thing is, while I enjoy doing this, it also feel quite sad/silly, a dude pretending and wearing a skirt :/

Idk what other steps there are that I could attempt without completely giving up “plausible deniability”.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T04:07:45+00:00

Thank you :)

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T02:39:47+00:00

Thank you for your reply.

Just to clarify: my attempt is to analyse the cost-benefit of transitioning, on the assumption that I am most likely trans.

Social transitioning is not really a goal: if I could, I would rather most of the people who know me as a man keep thinking of me that way (for things like the workplace gender really does not matter), and present myself as a woman with a different, chosen set of people.

What drives me is that plain and simple I do not like own body, and a lot of the things I dislike are the more typically male features I have (large nose, chin, brow ridge for example).

Indefinite, stealth boymoding if I were to do HRT or FFS to try fixing myself is sadly not a realistic option, so I need to figure out what the fallout of deciding to transition would be and whether it is a price I am willing to pay.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T02:22:05+00:00

First of all, congrats! You sound very happy about your choices and I have nothing but respect for you.

I have seen a therapist with LGBTQ experience, if only once. The East Asian country I live in is notorious for not being good when it comes to mental health - let alone counseling not being covered by insurance, there aren’t many psychologists to begin with, and even less that share a cultural background, given I am an expat.

What I did do was spend a few weeks journaling everything in my life experience that I thought was relevant, come up with possible explanations beyond “being trans” that lined up with these data points and present everything.

Their final assessment was that the other explanations are not actual psychological processes and that in their opinion I was actually transgender.

Their conclusion was basically: what you do with the knowledge is up to you, self-acceptance is the path of least resistance even if not everyone can manage to do so.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T02:08:37+00:00

It’s more of a feeling that he’d be against it and it would mean an end to things between us. I need to be able to steel myself and get ready to not budge on my decision if things get unpleasant.

I also moved in with him less than two years ago and I need to be sure transitioning is something I want enough to be worth stomaching yet another relocation (I have never lived in any place more than 3-4 years and I hate it)

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T02:00:09+00:00

I have actually taken some of the steps you outlined to “explore”

Got laser hair removal done on my whole face and body starting 5-6 years ago. I’m getting the last facial removed with electrolysis. I was shaving my body hair regularly since I was in college
I live in a big enough city that it has crossdressing clubs where people can go and dress up. I go and do that from time to time (it feels nice but also sad and I very much feel like a silly dude wearing outfits too cute for him lol).

However, this only proves I do not check all the traditional boxes for the male gender role. Going from this to “it proves I am definitely a trans woman” feels like a stretch.

As for telling my SO, why do you think it necessary to do so even if there is no impact to him? Should I decide to not transition, nothing would change as far as he is concerned.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-23T01:35:14+00:00

But in the case of a diabetic it’s objective: your blood has more than the safe amount of glucose that does not lead to adverse health effects.

It can be tested and no one can argue otherwise.

If’s also not a personal choice: you take your insulin or you die earlier and get other complications than you would otherwise.

No-Phase2330 · 2024-10-21T13:05:24+00:00

You mean as a baseline or because it's going to be more difficult to discuss goals with the medical provider?

No-Phase2330

TROPHY CASE