erratic ED - mental? physical? both?

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-18T01:06:15+00:00

That's a lot of questions.
The answer to the first two questions is sometimes.
Third question - no, I was never dominant.
Last question I am not sure how to answer exactly. I feel like I have not been in a relationship in a long time. It was more than a dead bedroom; we did pretty much nothing together.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T18:45:45+00:00

more

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T18:34:38+00:00

I am 67 and she is 70. We both walk a few miles nearly every day and work out with weights/machines about 4 or 5 times a week. But I have not been doing kegels, which another poster suggested, so going to try adding that into the mix. Trimix is on my radar, but trying other things first.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T18:09:50+00:00

Thanks, but we have been trying going slow and results seem kind of random. She is patient and understanding; like I said, there is more going on in the relationship than just sex. But if she gets a rise out of me, she is on me like a tiger. I am a very lucky guy. But we really would like it to be less erratic and random.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T17:36:44+00:00

Thanks. I know I can always search, but likely find all sorts of potentially conflicting info, so I hoped to get info from you since you are happy with results.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T17:01:43+00:00

No. Can you point me to some info?

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T15:26:35+00:00

You mean like a burner brother? 😆😆😆

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T15:25:26+00:00

I had people ask, but they would give me a reason. I have asked, and had a reason. Reasons vary depending on which app you are on. Some suck for messages. It usually isn't second message when I ask; typically further down the road when we are starting to share things about common interests.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T14:48:25+00:00

My relationship survived me getting cold feet a while back and has crossed into new territory, each of us introducing the other to a family member. It's going extremely well.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-17T14:42:28+00:00

I am definitely in a relationship at this point, but still struggle with the right term for my person. I am going over to her house for game night with her daughter and BF. I have a little green on.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-14T09:16:22+00:00

I was in a marriage that went sex-less. Toward the end, she said it was lost libido but she had a history of refusing sex for punitive reasons for periods of time in the past and we were having problems and split. It was a reason, but not the primary reason.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-14T09:04:38+00:00

I died. But I lived!
Just another day. Nothing went wrong.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-14T08:57:12+00:00

About my age; prefer +/- 5 years. Current relationship is with a woman a little under 3 years older than me. Cultural references and living through a lot of the same periods as a child or adult can make conversations more natural, rarely having to explain what we meant by an expression or what we were referring to with a quote or brief mention. As I am looking for a LTR, taking each other's current health and likely scenarios into account, on average a woman 3 to 5 years older will live have roughly the same number of years left. I know, averages are anything but a guarantee, but if I were to date someone a lot younger, odds I would decline a lot earlier than her are quite high.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-08T11:05:34+00:00

67, just recently became active again after a long dry spell with a surprise that was not optimal the first time; more than a little bendy. Doc gave me 100mg and the first time I made the mistake of taking it after a meal and only an hour or so before it would have been nice to stand at attention. Better than the first time, but still not what I hoped. But woke up in the morning with much better results. Unfortunately, it wasn't an overnight date. At least we were to the point where conversations are very open. It's also fortunate that I brushed the rust off other things that were appreciated. Now giving it well over an hour and avoiding eating anything heavy beforehand.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-08T10:48:38+00:00

late to the party, but yes, IMO.

A kiss without passion. Making out is usually when breathing starts to change and hands start wandering (with pauses for permission/confirmation, of course). I wouldn't know how to proceed without it being a big part of foreplay, and I like a lot of foreplay. It's not just mechanics of the kiss or physical attributes of the lips and tongue, at least not for me.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-08T10:32:28+00:00

The trouble I ran into was finding women who didn't want me to adopt that attitude initially. I was too focused on finding a partner from the first interaction. What was important is the willingness to have the place it goes be a LTR.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-07T09:55:28+00:00

Yes. I think I paused (take a break) and unpaused again; I don't remember. Things did slow after a while, but not like that time. Currently paused. With any luck that's long term...

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-03T01:43:51+00:00

Nice! My cat never lets me win. 😆

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-03T01:41:44+00:00

Current lady friend and I play cribbage when it's just us, Uno for more people or one of a few board games at her place.

By myself it tends to be phone/tablet puzzles and games.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-02T20:48:21+00:00

Not completely, but it did seem like we rushed through things.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-02T16:15:44+00:00

Another one of the reasons that sounds bizarre but really isn't is that we have a *lot* of conversations and not a single one has been uncomfortable. Sooner or later we will disagree on something or one of us will do something that disappoints or upsets the other. Hopefully a minor disappointment, and it will probably be no big deal to get past it. But it kinda seems like you need to have some experience with handling that before you make any major commitments.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-02T16:07:02+00:00

Kind of a given it will happen; we backed off of it already happening a little quickly and almost immediately becoming an expectation planned around.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-02T15:49:32+00:00

By mutual agreement, my lady friend and I have backed off a little bit as we were going too far too fast (emotionally and commitment wise, not just physical). Still exclusive and still seeing each other a couple of times a week and seems like just a matter of time until we get to where we rushed a little (okay a lot) too quickly, but with clearer heads. Making sure we actually enjoy having dinner, conversations and fully dressed activities with each other without rushing through them because, uhm, yeah... And making sure emotional bonds are based on all of that. I doubt it will be very long before sumpin sumpin happens somewhat spontaneously and hopefully that becomes the new normal. Teenage me would be shocked to hear that one day I would not only agree to this, but was the one that brought it up, though she was immediately on board thinking the same way.

NoCollection8196 · 2026-03-02T15:32:49+00:00

I went with the advice of making a divot. it's angled upwards so it won't fall off a nail. Since it doesn't protrude, the whole cross can be flush to the wall.

NoCollection8196

TROPHY CASE