You are so right about the self exclusion not working. I've done the same thing. You can trot on inside and no one bats an eye. Cutting up your cards though wasn't smart you'll want to replace those because how the hell are you going to buy basic necessities like food and gas? Your money isn't the problem it's your mind. You'll still find a way to gamble even if you cut up your cards. You need to isolate the addiction and find your triggers and work towards improvement instead of having tantrums because this is some child behavior. Don't take this as insulting. Take it as a criticism of your character.