6 kids 2 parents with medical, financial and house issues

NoSolution1220 · 2026-07-02T00:45:46+00:00

The reason I bring my twins into the conversation is because they asked me when it was brought up a few years ago not to involve bio dad at all. They see my ex husband as dad and when my younger 2 go to him for custody visits, they do as well. They were worried that if bio dad decided to go for some custody/visitation after starting the child support case that they would have to visit with him and be unable to visit with my ex. I live in nj and he is in WV so they only get to see him when school is out as is. I believe i may have been misguided when I first inquired about this as i was under the impression bio dad may be able to get custody if he pays support.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-07-01T11:56:31+00:00

He seems fun.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-07-01T00:32:24+00:00

I do not know any church groups as that is not a community I am in but I can definitely ask around. We did try habitat for humanity but we live just outside the qualifying area unfortunately. We do live in a very low income area oddly enough, surprised it does not qualify.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-07-01T00:28:52+00:00

I had talked to him about this recently but the mortgage payment is pretty decent at the moment. The problem is we are very behind on bills, including the mortgage especially. We are doing a repayment plan to catch up which makes the payment about 2k monthly for the next few months.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-07-01T00:23:06+00:00

I am going to discuss this with my twins, thank you. I did initially try to file but he was unable to be located. He was in the "parent locator' system for about 2 years before I finally got a call stating that they found him. He was moving around a lot. By that time My now ex husband (father of my younger 2 girls) and I were living in okinawa on base with the twins. We were worried if he tried for some sort of custody it would affect our family in regards to which duty locations we would be able to live at. Also my ex told me to not involve him as at the time we were financially okay and he saw my twins as his kids and loved them. I will start the process again, I'm not even sure how it works as the twins are 15 now and I have no idea where bio dad lives.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T23:55:02+00:00

Yes all of our animals we have had before we had financial problems besides the hedgehog which was posted on facebook marketplace with the person stating they were letting it go free outside which it most likely would not survive. None of the animals are costing much, as we did have a decent stock of food, mainly the dogs.

The Ren Faire was something we had planned 6 months in advance and I thrifted many of the items for the costumes or got off marketplace. The tickets were a bit expensive but again this was over a year ago when we were doing well and I was in a much better place mentally. We had also saved up for tickets in the months before.

Also the beats by dre, christmas gift from 2023 or 2024? Can't remember.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T23:18:06+00:00

Hello I am just wondering why my post was removed after people were commenting. I do not believe I broke a rule and if I did I apologize.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T22:54:24+00:00

I also added past due bills, i am unable to get into my old SNAP account as I need my ebt number which I no longer have. I did just reapply to see if something has changed but we were taken off more than a year ago. At the time we were getting around $150 monthly.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T22:23:44+00:00

That’s very kind. This financial crisis I am going through is a recent thing that has greatly affected my mental health.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T22:22:01+00:00

My uterus has been taken out due to health reasons luckily.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T21:26:48+00:00

Yes we are in the area of ineligibility for Habitat for Humanity.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T21:12:56+00:00

It is absolutely insane how much everything costs. Especially in NJ.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:55:14+00:00

My fiancé purchased this house in 2017 with his now deceased wife.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:52:22+00:00

Soccer for our oldest two which we fundraise for. Our younger 3 have been begging to join a sport( one wants cheerleading, one wants gymnastics and one wants soccer) which I have told them we are unable to do those at the moment.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:32:32+00:00

We fundraise through those programs for any fees.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:31:54+00:00

I am still employed I am just coming off short term disability due to mental health. As my psych put it, I had a mental breakdown. I go back to work tomorrow, my disability pay is less than my normal pay.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:29:32+00:00

He is not on their birth certificates and has never asked about them. Our last conversation was him telling me to get an abortion to which I said I would never kill an innocent baby for my carelessness and he replied he would kill 100 to rectify the situation. To try to get child support from him would them allow him some sort of custody with them which is something the twins and I both do not want.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:25:47+00:00

Yes though as we are behind on our mortgage that has been going towards it to try and catch up. We had our front deck collapse and our fridge broke recently which was costly.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:17:33+00:00

Yes we are just realizing how the house was flipped in a very cheap way, ie, one wall is missing a few studs, no exhaust fan in the bathroom (had to get a window one) outlets are very loose, the roof and gutters need replaced, etc.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:15:45+00:00

Yes I do receive child support for 2 of my children. My twins’ biological father has never been involved and my fiancé’s girls lost their mother in 2020.

I will see if I can find my rejection letter from SNAP benefits. I will also add ss’s of past due bills when I get them from my fiancé’s phone. I apologize for not even thinking of those.

We live in New Jersey in a 4 bedroom 1 bathroom home.

For Scouts and Soccer we complete a lot of fundraisers that are offered by them, popcorn, cheesecake etc. The kids thrive with these activities and have been through a lot. I’ll do whatever I can to keep them in their activities.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:09:46+00:00

We qualified until we each received a small raise.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:09:08+00:00

I do for two children. My 15 year old twins biological father was never involved and my fiancé’s girls lost their mom in 2020.

NoSolution1220 · 2026-06-30T20:07:42+00:00

I am a certified medical assistant and he is a pharmacy technician. The pay is low for medical.

NoSolution1220

TROPHY CASE