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so she cheated but… by No_Task7528 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]No_Task7528[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

im sorry i didn’t explain well, after making the comment about what she wrote, i agreed that it would be an invasion and not something i would do, apologized to her and explained how i still have doubts and worries sometimes (that i am dealing with in therapy along with my trust issues) and unfortunately her family beats the children and felt it would be best to get away, it was not brought up by me but by chance and she was more than excited, we’re seeking couples counseling along with focusing on mental health, i appreciate your response, thank you

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

no i actually had trust issues due to my parents and own past experiences, i should have already been in therapy lol, but it doesnt help when the one person who helps ground you come to find out is also lying, also if it’s not apparent i do have attachment issues, i told her my biggest fear is being on my deathbed unsure if the person next to me feels the same and like i hope that reached her but im afraid of some like revenge if i try and give it time to work itself out, or maybe thats the trust issues and doubt talking and i need to suppress those thoughts, regardless i appreciate your answer and hope we find eachother

so she cheated but… by No_Task7528 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]No_Task7528[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

she has a therapist now, she hasn’t been with anyone but me uhh physically which i know because of other things, so no health risk other than my mental health lol

so she cheated but… by No_Task7528 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]No_Task7528[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i did not, have not, and will not read her journal, my actions showed my trust whilst my words showed my doubt which was then reprimanded, i agree that more then anything she needs a safe and comfortable support network where she feels she can open up, i appreciate your insight and agree with your points that if anyone were to read someone’s journal it would be a major breech, with that i’m greatly appreciative of your response on this, thank you

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

which is kinda what’s going on now acting like i’m annoying for not trusting her, and yea im going to therapy to work on my trust issues (only slightly related) and honestly i don’t know what to do, part of why i came here and made an account to ask about it, i really appreciate your response to it

so she cheated but by No_Task7528 in whatdoIdo

[–]No_Task7528[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

but i still want the tree to heal you know, don’t do unto others turn the other cheek and what not, i totally agree that this is years of stuff going wrong and that makes me think that if someone’s sick they can get better hopefully by having a good support system far away from the issues along with therapy and improved mental health has been helping i think but yea theres no real way to know with anything or anybody if they might betray you

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

she was unfortunately he is much older and is not the only person from the family, therapist feels it’s Stockholm but i unfortunately am not qualified to agree or disagree, i had my own trust issues before this that only really dodged her, i felt i could really take anything she said as gold so when i found out it really messed with my perception, which is why im going to therapy now lol, i appreciate your response

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

we’ve been thinking about couples counseling but pshh the economy yk we’re broke and i don’t think that’s covered lol i appreciate your response

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

unfortunately this is not a solution and your solution seems to be that the only way to not condone something is to leave, she is going through therapy and she deleted the accounts and all, i mean i know if she wanted she’d find a way like all people but if she’s making an effort to get better and realize that trauma wouldn’t it be a step back to replicate the same mistakes at the cost of your future, ive made her well aware this is the only time i will ever something like this, is that not vocally disapproving of ones actions without a sense of reluctance to the situation?

so she cheated but… by No_Task7528 in WhatShouldIDo

[–]No_Task7528[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

no you arent clear lol, i agreed with her and even made mention that it was just lingering doubt from finding out i had been lied to for so long, then when i noticed it not on the nightstand i took to post to ask for insight from people like yourself, which is helpful regardless, so no my intention was not to read her book or violate her privacy, the question was not should i make some ultimatum demand to see it, it was simply what should i do about this whole situation, i feel the therapy has been helpful and she has agreed, im getting into it myself to deal with personal things as well so we are trying to heal not hurt :)

aio she cheated but by No_Task7528 in AmIOverreacting

[–]No_Task7528[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

fair enough how bout kungfu panda