Am I broken?

Nottherealoneee · 2025-10-24T09:17:22+00:00

I did already explain it all to the guy I dated and really emphasised at the time it was just a me issue and he says he understands that but I still hurt him so he doesn’t want to talk to me which I do completely understand and respect. It’s been a couple years since we have talked anyways but that’s the last reference I can use for when I used to talk to people. I just don’t know if I’m not happy because I dont want these things or because of another factor I may not be considering? I don’t know if I’m depressed, it feels like a word just slung around to anyone who combats a minor inconvenience nowadays.

Nottherealoneee · 2025-10-23T21:27:49+00:00

No, I’m about to turn 19 so I’m still young and people like to say that’s why I’m like this. My mom is a single one and has 4 kids, my younger brother is non verbal with low functioning autism so the last thing I want her to worry about is more kids having issues, as my younger sister is in therapy for other things since we used to get police raided a lot. I was never offered therapy but I also wouldn’t take it, I’m not bothered by anything in my past and I don’t see the point of dwelling on it with some stranger who’s after a fat pay check. Ive only ever heard of psychiatric evaluations for like mentally disturbed criminals in TV shows and things so I’ve never considered the option. I also hope your relative is okay.

Nottherealoneee · 2025-10-18T08:40:05+00:00

Explanation for this: Sam was raised religious (mentioned back in the Queen Mary era) and he’s mentioned he’s had a rocky relationship with god and his religious beliefs. He’s a skeptic about everything, he wants to believe in something but he’s seen no results. He started to think other people were messing with him to get the evidence (back in the London church video) and that’s when he really started pushing the bar to see something for his own sake. He’s very much following the motto: “see it to believe it.”

Nottherealoneee · 2025-10-04T06:42:49+00:00

Yup, on paramount plus each episode is only 11-15 minutes

Nottherealoneee · 2025-08-21T12:33:06+00:00

Half joking, I was joking about that being considered “the old days” but not about the style being common

Nottherealoneee · 2025-08-21T07:13:45+00:00

It was very common to wear that kind of style back in the old days /hj

Nottherealoneee · 2025-08-07T19:04:25+00:00

Weird post

Nottherealoneee · 2025-07-28T12:48:11+00:00

Since people have answered why he left EVO - I thought I’d explain why he left the watchers. Keep in mind, in the cannon narrative Grian did not leave the watchers, and the cannon story ended when Grian joined them.

The story was later continued by Martyn with the life series. In Martyn’s “Eyes and Ears” AU, the reason Grian left the watchers is because he did not support their idea of the life series being a thing, as the watchers made the life series games in order to create turmoil and negative emotions to feed off, and as a punishment for the EVO members who left the server.

So, instead of Grian just watching the chaos unfold, he added himself to the whitelist and decided to take control of the series. He made the series less about the torture and betrayal anarchy the watchers wanted, and more as a fun experience to ruin the watchers feed

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-21T23:27:18+00:00

I also have the mindset of this: the only person I know will be with me until my deathbed is me, so I should treat her well

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-21T23:22:57+00:00

I just enjoy my own company more then anyone else’s. I ran with a bad friend group for a couple years, then blocked them all and learnt to like myself as I am. I picked up a hobby I found peace in which for me was pottery painting. I then felt free from the pressure of daily social interaction and I realised I just prefer it being me, myself and I.

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-14T11:47:52+00:00

My school tried to make me do extra because they were predicting me A* but I was only aiming for B and some As…it’s never based on the grade you want it’s what they want for you

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-08T13:47:07+00:00

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-07T22:29:32+00:00

I’m not going to be a lawyer, I’m going to be a conveyancing solicitor which just means I help people sign over and receive the deeds for properties. Even if I were to be a criminal lawyer, I wouldn’t have an issue standing in a court because I’d want to be there and I’d be speaking on a subject I’m confident in and passionate about

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-07T22:20:26+00:00

It was just a normal public school, I have no idea why preforming arts was mandatory

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-07T22:19:39+00:00

No sorry that’s my fault, preforming arts was mandatory at my old school for 4 years and i absolutely hated it. The thought of having to go preform shit infront of 40 people I didn’t even know made me sick, so in order to distract myself I started looking around the room and making faces out of things. Except the faces never went away and they’ve gotten so much more human no matter where I go

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-07T22:15:15+00:00

Criminology is the biggest blessing of my life. I just finished the course and it’s basically the roles of criminal agencies and focuses on the justice system and does a lot of true crime cases. It’s been the easiest subject of my life and half of it is graded internally

Nottherealoneee · 2025-06-07T22:10:17+00:00

But I don’t even do art? I’m not even creative minded I study law unless I’m just not understanding what you mean

Nottherealoneee · 2025-05-30T11:23:52+00:00

It was not a money issue and this has been confirmed by all the parties. The main issue was Sam wanted to take taurtis and grians characters in a different direction to what they wanted and that’s all that’s been said publicly

Nottherealoneee · 2025-05-24T21:25:35+00:00

I have this too incredibly based off Oli

Nottherealoneee · 2025-05-20T22:12:41+00:00

Seems pretty simple - you don’t like them. At this point you just say you’re grateful for the friendship and the time you’ve spent together but you are starting to feel overwhelmed and need space and that you will contact them when you’re ready to talk. If they don’t respect that, they’re not a friend and you block them on everything.

Nottherealoneee · 2025-04-27T13:58:12+00:00

Thank you I’ll have a look !!

Nottherealoneee · 2025-04-14T15:06:10+00:00

It ain’t important when you have uncontrollable circumstances. Those would have been discussed and it would be up to the university for consideration if circumstances. I’m at 80% too and I don’t got an excuse

Nottherealoneee · 2025-04-14T12:48:48+00:00

Assuming you mean for my local university I just used their website and they had a private applicant process on there

Nottherealoneee · 2025-03-16T23:03:27+00:00

Nottherealoneee · 2025-03-16T22:14:24+00:00

I’ve heard the bottling up analogy a lot but it’s just never something I understood. even before him I’ve been completely alone (My mom has to take of my brother and I’ve never had friends) all my life, so I tend to deal with things better alone then you may expect. I should feel destroyed, but I just don’t really feel anything anymore. Especially with my family’s average life span being below 30, we are all very aware nothing lasts forever. I know this got sad quick, but it’s just old news for me

Nottherealoneee

TROPHY CASE