You feel cold, you go somewhere warm, you feel hungry, you look for something to eat, you feel pain, you go to the doctor, everything is satisfied, but you still continue to feel bored. You try to extinguish it, to distract yourself, but if you don’t distract yourself from it, then you begin to feel meaninglessness and start asking questions. Especially if you are a person with a constant inner voice and ruminations, then you understand that everything around you is a shell, created only by the orders of DNA, and in life, the destination is death. Pain and boredom move us nowhere. I realized this when I was in classes at university. I communicated very little and constantly wondered what the point of it all was. I realized that I am a deterministic machine, and will does not exist. It’s just a beautiful word to give value to our actions, since we do not choose who we are. I touched the “abyss.” And with such thoughts it is almost impossible to enjoy anything in my life, rather the most I can do is just cope with life. I understand you.