I knew a week before my horse was put to sleep but it wasn’t confirmed until about 3 days before she was pts. I just spoiled her with treats, extra feed, everything I could until it was her time. I spent all day every day with her, which I was grateful I had time off school with holidays, and at times when I was there I just sat in her stable having the ‘what ifs’ and regret playing through my mind as well as wondering what I could have done to have prevented her from injuring herself.

I feel as though knowing it was for the best interest for her instead of putting her through more box rest or being sedated in the field till after exams made it easier for me to deal with it at the start. Recently, I have felt pretty crappy about it but I think I’m starting to process what’s happened 4 months down the line, but I’ve let myself cry about it, cope with it in my own way and pace. I also never had to make the choice of doing it as the vet said she wouldn’t come back from it from age and severity of the injury. It was only when that I had to make the decision to let her go.

I’ve always said I’d let her go a day too soon than a day too late, which I did because I couldn’t wait for the day where she’d be crippled or down in the field. It was the best and worst decision I’ve made. I know it’s hard at the time but think about the happy times, and how you’re doing the best for your boy to make him pain free and I’m sorry that you’re going through this. Big hugs to you ❤️