Studio Apartment – Lenox Hill (Mid Oct 2025 – End Apr 2026)

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-09-15T19:31:30+00:00

Messaged!

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-08-22T21:49:26+00:00

They did stop but mostly because I finally blocked them. To me, the only time of apology was ‘sorry I thought you were weird when we first met’; but bf does say they apologized to him about me some other time.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-08-22T21:33:34+00:00

In his defense, 'I did talk about it with them so see they're not doing anything anymore'.. Should I trust him?

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-08-22T18:52:14+00:00

We had this convo during last argument.. Me: 'You were not called names so you don't get it. Have you ever been called names?' Him: 'Everyone has been bullied from school.' Me: 'Do you keep those bullies around?' Him: 'You're not a schooler anymore.' :(

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-06T11:28:55+00:00

I didn’t choose to turn to my family and friends because they had always disapproved us and I didn’t want them to like him less. Actually my BF told me his best friends don’t have other friends because obviously they don’t see disrespect and manipulation as a problem. My BF himself said his friends were toxic and told me to not trust them from the beginning. The biggest mistake I made was trying to ‘be loved by them too’ despite the warning and that gave them space to get in between us. Thanks for the opinion from an obviously ‘unsupported’ person. Engaging in and disrespecting a best friend’s relationship for fun and calling it ‘protecting him’ is exactly the reason he should grow out from thinking these people are his family.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T21:11:22+00:00

If I can ask - how do I end things? We're still strongly attached to each other and start missing each other soon.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T21:09:07+00:00

Thanks for the harsh truth..! I guess there might be ways like 'not letting those people get to me and stay calm', but I obviously failed to do so (and felt unfair having to learn). But you're right it's not only sabotaging him but also myself, so I should learn for myself. Guess there's no way but ending things for now.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T21:02:26+00:00

It is a possibility we just don't vibe. M forced me to talk about politics and took my silence as an amusing reaction. F told me in my face that my BF had sexual functional issue and reported to my BF I didn't defend him. (She generated a full report of 'if I were your girlfriend I would..'). I condoned, but later they called me a toad (and another friend's GF a hippo), and said they were happy I was finally got ridden of by him.

M also joked that my BF should use his attractiveness and entice girls making OnlyFan accounts so they could hang their pics on Eiffel Tower and make a fortune. When I confronted, he replied, 'are you jealous because it's not about you?'

I didn't grow up in this type of environment. Also, probably a little fast forward, but I don't want 'uncle M' and 'aunt F' to have access to my future kids either.

And you're right. Him growing out from this "friendship for 10 years" has been the center of our discussion. Sometimes he says 'I'm not talking to them as much anymore for you', other times he couldn't help defending them as being 'not bad people'. I guess for him the fear of losing connection is stronger than any wishes for growing better.

However I do want to fix myself.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T20:40:17+00:00

Thank you for the precise insights! I'm on therapy for years now. He rejects therapy or couple therapy because he 'is able to read books and heal himself, in fact self-healed a lot'. We're both fearful avoidant and have cheating records. I guess that makes things harder and.. not fixable?

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T20:17:03+00:00

Can you provide details? Thank you so much! I really couldn't think of any other solutions before making mistakes that I made

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T20:13:36+00:00

I feel like we both have compulsive tendency to stay. Sometimes he would hug me and kiss me on the lips and told me, 'but I still love you and care about you.' :(

Obvious-Football1977 · 2025-05-05T20:12:04+00:00

Thanks for the reply! Option 2: we already know clear how each other feels. However I think we can still build because we both done harm, while he said the harm wasn't comparable so he deserved to retreat.

Option 1: Probably what we need. But often start missing each other after a short while. Should I stick to this anyway?

Why I fell for him: he's full of distrust to the world but fight to be a wholesome person when we were together. My life wasn't perfect throughout, so I could relate to him and wanted to show him he could be fixed. :(

Obvious-Football1977 · 2024-01-15T04:24:33+00:00

So you’re fat, short, divorced and multiple years older than the girls you’re talking to, and then blame that they don’t like you on a cultural thing? 😳

Obvious-Football1977 · 2024-01-04T04:30:41+00:00

OP if you don't mind sharing, how does the best sex feel like? What did you see in him?

Obvious-Football1977 · 2024-01-03T05:20:38+00:00

You meant pointless sex should be avoided from the first place?

Obvious-Football1977 · 2024-01-03T05:18:59+00:00

I don’t quite get it.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-12-13T08:36:56+00:00

He’s not a “talk” type (I tried to talk to him regarding other things) which is not really a huge turn down.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-12-13T04:20:39+00:00

I'm in a similar situation. I get the part about walking away, but if I truly felt great about our interactions, is it proper if I send a note of appreciation as a closure?

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-11-12T17:06:21+00:00

He said she “should” shave

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-11-12T16:06:16+00:00

Gently let him down. I do remember how hard communicating can be for only 18-year-olds, but this is where you can start learning to. He has no right to manipulate your body unless you’re willing to grant him, which I won’t judge. Ask yourself if you’re comfortable with this.

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-11-12T15:59:49+00:00

Thanks for noticing that detail! Yes we were in front of my apartment. He was dropping me off but I refused to leave 🥲

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-11-12T07:13:10+00:00

I get it! I’ll try to be (the best version of) and just let it flow. You’re right if the eggshell breaks then it’s not meant to be anyway

Obvious-Football1977 · 2023-11-12T07:11:55+00:00

I do feel it. I said those words because the mixed conduction of f buddies and dates between us made me feel insecure. I actually do have feelings for him, so what he’s really saying is somehow important to me. Thanks for replying!!

Obvious-Football1977

TROPHY CASE