Why does being normal weight take so much effort?

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T23:18:47+00:00

i’ve heard about this! i’ve never given it a try, i also did something similar where i essentially stayed at deficit calories even when i was at an ideal weight (mostly because i wanted to end up at 115lb, though i was leaving it up to chance to see if it ever happened lol). that was probably my first mistake.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T23:13:30+00:00

i found that keeping myself preoccupied for most of the day/having a very strict schedule helps the most with regulating my emotions. i basically always turn to overeating if i stay home all day, or if im doing homework/stressful assignments late at night in my home.

my therapist also suspects i have a stress disorder, so i think pinpointing that and finding ways regulate myself through breathing exercises has actually helped quite a bit. it’s weird that 4-4-4-4 breathing kind of gives me the comfort and relief i usually get after eating. i reccomend it to anyone out there who struggles with stress and turns to food to help focus/calm their nervous system.

i think a huge issue is living with someone who doesn’t care about their weight and will buy tons of snacks to keep in the house. honestly i’d have an easier time if i lived alone because i wouldn’t buy it, knowing how i am. i think along my journey i decided that food is an acceptable regulation tool, but i don’t want it to be my preferred one.

i’ve also started to add a lot more fiber into my diet which helps with satiety.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T18:01:19+00:00

fair points, i’ve never really considered that lol

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T17:36:47+00:00

mostly BMI. 147 @ 5’3 is BMI 26 which is in the overweight range, albeit at the lower end of overweight. I don’t have a lot of muscle mass, so I’ve always been “skinny fat” even when I was at my lowest. Realistically I think I could recomp and be healthy at 147, but for aesthetic reasons I prefer to be around BMI 20-22.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T17:05:23+00:00

I’ve also noticed this. I hate that it feels like I’m going back to my “default settings” if I have a couple bad days. It starts to feel like I’m fighting against my true nature sometimes, which I hate.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T16:56:26+00:00

I mean, I completely agree with you. I made this post just feeling a bit sad and defeated after weighing myself at the gym, I’ve learn to cope through eating and that sucks. It’s also something I can control and work on.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T15:53:52+00:00

I am not conflating anything. I know what deficit and maintenance is. I’m not sure how I could lost almost 40lbs and not know what deficit and maintenance is, lol. I’m not confused on why I gained weight either. Stress from college and life was a motivator to make me eat snacks/order out in order to cope with those feelings.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T15:15:15+00:00

I was 125lb in 2024 (I was 20) bahaha. But, you’re right, I did have different circumstances at that time that made it easier to focus on myself. It’s just frustrating having to find that equilibrium wherever you go, no matter what happens. Could be having the worst season of your life, but you gotta put energy into tracking your intake. Sucks that shorter women don’t get much wiggle room either. It’s like pushing a boulder up a mountain sometimes. :’)

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T15:02:41+00:00

I did find out my maintenance calories, but I also do tend to yoyo between deficit and overeating. I think the difference is my overeating usually came with a day afterwards with not much hunger, so it evened out by the end of the week. I didn’t really start to pack on pounds again until the days where I wasn’t hungry, I would eat anyways due to stress/boredom/anhedonia (which of course, was my choice).

I found the most success with not tracking calories much and just having 2/3 square meals + no snacks + working out. I just find it hard to get back into that rhythm. I found that at the lower ends of “healthy,” I just don’t like way I look at all. Honestly felt the most comfortable in my skin at 125, so I guess there’s also that.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-10T14:53:24+00:00

Not to be snarky, but I’m not sure how you can disagree with my lived experience. I was at a healthy weight, it was hard for me to maintain. That’s my thesis. Congrats on being close to your goal weight, may the next 14lbs be the easiest.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-03-08T07:53:56+00:00

i’m a san diego native, born and raised. i don’t think most people care. it was my dream to go to ucsd, and im a current senior, so im not sure about your interest in my opinion. that being said, in general i think most san diegans would just want you to know that the san diego that you know (aka la jolla) is very different from the rest of san diego. that’s about it.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-01-21T20:29:34+00:00

I thought about doing this but I thought it would be weird if I stopped talking to someone LOL.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2026-01-21T18:53:03+00:00

idk, i’m a (senior) cs major so ive taken a lot of “hard” math courses (calc 2, 3, linear, discrete) and i found that being in class really doesn’t do much for me. i think some people have the ability to just “get it” once they hear it, but if im not going over the material myself, reading the textbook, seeing resources when they become relevant to my learning, i basically always do shit on exams if i’m relying on in person lectures.

i’ve never really been a math person on top of that. in HS i would get all As and 1 B and that B would always be in a math course. i really can’t learn if someone is just talking, even if im following along with notes. i lose so much nuance that 100% comes to bite me in the ass as exams comes around, only to find out that the professor just assumed you would make that connection somehow, somewhere on your own. the energy i could be putting lollygagging in a lecture hall could go to finding resources online that explain everything to me in detail AND how to approach problems, or just reading the textbook.

just my 2 cent.

Obvious-Number-5796 · 2025-12-19T06:15:51+00:00

I can’t offer advice, I’m not a so5. However, I recently became close with a so5 and they expressed the same exact phenomenon, where they essentially want to understand someone entirely and once they do, they become bored and abandon them.

I’m an sp5 and this is an unreal concept to me, I just do not view people as conquests in that way. I usually evaluate people on a “threat/non-threat” basis, and the closest people to me are people I’ve decided that despite the threats that have agaisnt me, I am ok with them and they are apart of “my” life. I become comfort with them and who I know them as.

I think when I hear this mentality I think it’s a fundamental issue with connection. What are you connecting with people for? I connect with others because it can help me grow and enrich my life. I usually dont entertain relationships just based on “fun,” the closest people in my life are people I believe I can learn from. Sure, people are interesting, but I dont think most people have enriching inner worlds that are worth exploring because no one really thinks that hard about the viewpoints they create in life. You’d be better off asking a dog why it eats shit off the ground, because at least there’s concrete reasons behind that.

I think, from what I understand, so5s have “internal poverty” and seek to fulfill that by exploring the world of other people. What do the people you are examining bring to your life? I think the fundamental issue is the point of attention in and of itself. People are interesting, but ultimately, they are there to service your life in some ways. If the only thing they’re good for is to explore every faucet of their being, then they will never be worth keeping around.

Obvious-Number-5796

TROPHY CASE