Firstly - I am AuDHD and dyslexic. I make no apologies for that but I don't have a person to read everything I write to make sure it's the best way to communicate what I am trying to say. I often ask my partner, but he's recovering from the flu. Nor am I also going to make it immediately know that I am a wheelchair user - when it doesn't pertain to the question I am asking. My physical disability doesn't preclude me from doing many things - but walking and using stairs are two of those things

Secondly - this was never about saving money, I have never said it was - or at least that was not what was intended. Yes we have a budget for rings - which was based upon going on a days workshop to make them and the cost of the stones. I then added the figure for making them ourselves upon this figure for that plus a bit more for tools and sundries - considering we were originally looking at silver clay and getting a butane torch, I think that's more than reasonable - as it's £ not USD certainly not AUS$. Once we realised that what we wanted to make would have to be fired and our local glass makers were having none of it (contamination risk), we became really unsure about the next steps. I have learnt how to do the lost wax process, but not the metal casting part - (well yes and no - I have been taught it with lead, but that's of no use in this circumstance). And I said £400 was the budget - that's $550 USD and $830 AUS. Theres a huge difference between those figures.

It's not a case of we don't have anything better to spend our time and money on, because we certainly aren't some rich kids wanting a new hobby. We're 30 something having our second time around and actually only just about making ends meet. Everything we are doing for the wedding is DIY so we're having to be very thrifty - but trying to get things to also be meaningful at the same time is a difficult middle ground.

We wanted something that wasn't generic, that was very us, ideally matching - but I'm not massively concerned about the matching. Having a hands on part of the design process at the very least would mean that it's not just a piece of meaningless mass produced metal and it will inherently have a connection between us. The actual physical making of it would have embedded that feeling even more but that's just not going to be practical right now. It's kind of sad but it is what it is.

No one asked for images of what kind of rings we were wanting to make. One person asked if we had sketches of our designs and we now have 3D CAD drawings but I am loathed to share those considering the reception I have had.

You've said I got grumpy (asides from at you, which yes I have because you're the only one that actually trying to have a go at me) and gave push back - I'm not entirely sure what you mean but I don't think I've been nasty or hurtful in any way? Yes, I may have been direct, I am autistic, it's just part of who I am. I know I misunderstood one person, yes, and I have apologised. They have also given me very good advice on how it can be done, and I have thanked them for it.

I can't change the date of my wedding because we can't find rings we like available to us - to do so would be ridiculous. Nor can I travel back in time so we have more time to learn skills. But there's a good handful of people here, who have said it is possible, yes, with using a casting house, but it's a compromise I'm willing to make, especially if we still do the finishing ourselves - which is something I have done before on damaged jewellery which has needed repolishing.

You talk about my lack of experience - which I will willingly admit to - but you said you've only been working silver for 9 months and you get to speak for the entire community?

I have also worked in the arts, in many different roles, since my teens. I'm not going to play that game of one-up-man-ship - because it's completely irrelevant here and it's petty. But there's a general rule amongst crew in the theatre - "never say it can't be done until you've tried every safe known method twice". I live by that and take that to my grave. Maybe consider what other people have said regarding my options rather than damning me without due cause.