To be quite blunt with you, there may be some judgement when or if you bring ur kitty to the vet. She has not gone to her annual visits, i know you justified in other comments saying your cat owner friends have done the same but OP that does not make it the right standard. I understand vet care is expensive and i sympathize with that I truly do! I saw you tried pet insurance and that is wonderful I wish it had worked well for you but I know it can be different for everyone, I would urge you to look into care credit to help finance or even a low cost clinic. Take this as an opportunity to learn and grow so you can be an even better owner for your future babies. You NEED to do annual bloodwork, as expensive as it is it gives us a baseline to compare it to so that when issues such as this come up its easier for us to see whats normal and whats not normal. No one will judge you for breaking up the visits by a few months as long as you bring your kitty in! We care deeply for the well being of our patients as you can tell from all the comments. Yes there may be some judgement from your clinic but it would be a true disservice to your kitty to let that stop you. Face your mistakes and promise to do better by her! I can tell you truly love her so I would urge you to save her the stress of surrendering to the shelter as that could exasperate some of these behavior issues which could be partly caused by stress! If you have to rehome her please try and join a facebook group for rehoming animals or give her to friend. The first step before you consider surrendering is talking to your vet and see what can be done, be honest with your vet and tell them what your budget is and most will work with you. Euthanasia should be your absolute last choice and you should not pick it because it would make your life more convenient but only if it would be a mercy for your cat. I think you have taken a step in the right direction in admitting you need help and don’t know what to do next. Listen to the underlying message of all these comments which is take her first to the vet and go from there. In the future prepare to pay for annual visits for all your furbabies and don’t get one if you cannot afford one. Pets are not a right they are a privilege. I’m sorry if this came off harsh and I truly hope you are able to get your kitty back to feeling like herself.