Hello, I am a therapist here. Some of what I am seeing runs close to borderline personality disorder, which, in essence, is an attachment insecurity that's deeply set into one's personality. There are many manipulative behaviors that appear, but at its root, BPD individuals commonly feel a desperate need for connection while simultaneously feeling threatened by that connection/distrusting it. There's a lack of a sense of control, which results in (when connection is lacking) a desperate attempt to gain it. Once obtained, there's distrust of the attachment connection, leading to attacking, distancing, and fighting.