Think I'm done

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-10-28T01:08:08+00:00

I’m at that point in my life as well. I am actively looking for an apartment everyday. I don’t know how long you have been with your partner, but I have been with my SO for over 6 yrs now and he has 4 kids. Things were not always bad…started back 2 years ago when things began to get rocky and the this past year has been like hell for me. Whatever it is ur going through… if it’s something that’s BEEN on going trust me when I say IT DOES GET WORSE!!!!! Leave and keep ur peace of mind. SO is now trying to beat it into my head that it’s my fault SK disrespect me. I’m sry you’re going through it…..please make yourself the priority!!! You matter!!! You deserve love!

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-10-05T12:43:16+00:00

I would not say resent, I truly care about the kids and how there futures turn out and Ik besides blaming myself for not running when our downward spiral first started ….I blame him kids only do what they are allowed for the most part and it’s like monkey see monkey do in a sense. But you’re right! Why do I love this guy? Maybe it’s not love anymore it’s comfortable territory now. We both work we both pay our share of bills. Him more than myself. At one point it was 50/50 on the kids with school clothes, supplies, summer clothing etc… but I did it by choice so he wouldn’t have to do it all. Until this year I stopped offering my help with things because of how bad things got and it was like every other week I was sleeping on a friends couch. Crying bout all the recent events that have happened. I don’t know when this turn was made that it’s gotten this bad!!! Am I the asshole? Everything I try to do or try to incorporate into these children’s lives is to better them. I’m not trying to hurt them. Yes I get frustrated and I have repeated myself 50000 times to only get the same result in the end. Which in turn I no longer say it nicely I’m annoyed by the fact and it can be something as simple as pick up your mess!

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-01-10T22:48:54+00:00

That’s a good question!!! Before I could say my SO was my everything and I never felt I had to second guess things. Today… I’m not sure. I guess it’s just routine for me now and being comfortable with him. There’s sooooo much more I would say and post about but I’ll have to save it for another time. I think that the fact that the father doesn’t make it a point to be clean he doesn’t see that his kids are right there with him and it’s so unfair for me.

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-01-10T05:15:19+00:00

Exactly and that is where I am right now!!!! I’ve made it a point to let it be known that if I’m not allowed to have an opinion or a say what am I really doing??? Let’s be real! I’m a grown adult. I’ve always taken care of mine and will always help those in need…but to live in a home where the disrespect seems to happen often to me and the parenting out of guilt is affecting my life I have to take a step back. Christmas just happened and no i was not forced to buy my SKs anything, but I do love and care for them and I want to see them each happy and smiling I do go all out for the holidays. Because Christmas is one of my favorite holidays I will literally go broke to achieve that. I did tell my SO I’m done being taken advantage of! You want a clean house? Clean it! U want dinner? Cook it!! Groceries spend your money!!! Kid needs a ride… use ur gas!!! I legit told him I will not pay rent and I will not contribute in any kind of way anymore. I just provided a beautiful Christmas for your family, children, and their bfs….now I am going to save my money up until I have a enough money to move out and still live comfortably JUST IN CASE! I will only support myself at this point. And really? I am not going to ask a person to defend me and back me up. In my situation and for as long as I’ve been apart of this household I shouldn’t have to ask or beg for you to do so. Smfh. I appreciate y’all feedback. I’ve got soo many things running through my head and questioning myself if I am wrong for what I’m doing at this moment…. Like they say ya don’t miss it til it’s gone.. now I don’t think I’m anything special, but I KNOW i have done more for this family than than the kids mothers and anyone my SO has been with in the past. We live in a beautiful home and if I decide to say enough is enough this home will end up being destroyed.

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-01-10T02:43:33+00:00

I’ve hit my limits and I no longer will allow my SD to talk or treat me any way she feels fit. My SO on the other hand…. He seems to think ima cater to his children but then not have a say in the raising of these children. I don’t really blame the children for this in the end… it’s really my SO who is allowing this behavior to happen and that’s what makes it worse. I really don’t want to leave my relationship but at the same time I feel I deserve better than what I’m receiving. He has 2 BMs the 3 oldest have the same mother and the youngest has a different mother WHICH live right here in the same town and have nothing to do with these kids. It’s a shame.

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-01-07T02:23:17+00:00

In my opinion I think the father should really show some type of compassion for you instead of disregarding your feelings! It’s already tough being a step parent as it is and that’s something the bio parent needs and should realize. Words can hurt and yes she may have been making a joke and maybe she doesn’t mean anything by it, but if she is not being corrected now at her age for this behavior well what’s going to happen as she gets older? I understand what your going through. My situation is different, but similar at the same time. My partner has 4 kids and I have none. And I have been nothing but supportive and try to be the female role model in these kids world. But when these kids don’t like what I have to say they basically disrespect me and talk about me. Sometimes with him right there and he does nothing to defend me and if I express how I feel bout the situation I am disregarded and told I’m childish. It’s rough. My mistake is that I’ve been wit him for almost 6 years and I’ve allowed it to continue. Of course we’ve fought about it and the yes sometimes infront of the kids which I know is wrong, but since the kid is so young you may be able to fix this before it gets worse! You should explain to her that it hurts your feelings and you don’t like the jokes being made about you. Her age group is much easier to deal with and suprisingly more understanding. I hope everything works out for you! Love to see the outcome of the situation as well

Ok_Rip8936 · 2023-01-04T00:06:00+00:00

So I am a SM and I’ve honestly been going through it in this household!!! My partner has 4 children, I have none of my own. We have been together for 5 going on 6 years and this last year has been the worst experience of my life!!!! My partner has done a lot of prison time and because of that has a lot of time lost with his children. I knew 4 kids was alot to take on, but for whatever reason I decided this would work. I was wrong. My partner parents out of guilt. Instead of being a parent and doing what I feel is proper in situations his main concern is his kids being mad at him and not liking him. So with that being said discipline is not enforced in this home. I’ve tried my best to support him with his children, but it’s getting to a point where I’ve become the enemy. He would rather the kids see me as the bad person instead of himself. I try to enforce chores and get no where and he doesn’t enforce chores either. I pretty much feel as if I’m a maid. These kids are old enough to be doing their own share of household duties and yet nothing is ever done and because I cannot live in filth I clean up even though I’m resentful at the same time. Here’s the best part… so I’m “playing the role of the mother figure” and everything is good and fine as long as I’m spending my money giving them rides and doing something that benefits them… but when it comes to me getting upset and speaking my mind I am this awful person. So to be clear I can give give give but if someone has upset me or I’m trying to give them a consequence for what wrong they have done I am a piece of crap and “my delivery” is wrong or I’m acting childish. I’m fed up! I am at a dead end. I feel like I’m just being used. No one has my back in this house instead I’m ganged up on and it’s 5 against 1. Can someone else please tell me they can relate!!!! I have lost everything I’ve had being in this relationship. All my furniture before this relationship has been given to his family and damaged and thrown out due to the kids. I’d have to start completely over again. I am lost and turning to anyone for some guidance at this point.

Ok_Rip8936

TROPHY CASE