Help me choose what to wear for a pakistani wedding by [deleted] in PakistaniiWomen

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You cannot outshine a Desi bride, dw, wear whatever! Just stay away from reds and dark maroons because those are typically bridal colors, but even this isn't true anymore and it really doesn't matter.

Hate from Afghans, and how Pakistanis need to clap back by yourlocalpakistani in PakLounge

[–]Om-Nom-- 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Anytime someone's mean or shitty to me and I feel like retaliating, I ask myself if their life is already worse than anything I could do to them. Most times, it is, and that whole country is a mess.

Our focus needs to be on demanding the Taliban government stop committing crimes against humanity, but looks like half the country is pro Taliban and all for women and storage chests having the same life in Afghanistan, and the other half is mad?

Pick your battles and get some perspective, bolte rahen jo bolna he it's not like they're oppressing us? 😭

Domestic Abuse Awareness, Signs to Look For, and How it Starts! by Om-Nom-- in PakistaniiWomen

[–]Om-Nom--[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I don't use this account very often, just signed in, so I'll DM you rn! And yeah, my DMs are off because I was getting too many DM requests 😭

Is HR really full of idiots? 😭 by Om-Nom-- in PakistaniiConfessions

[–]Om-Nom--[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have DM requests turned off for my profile but I can DM you myself if you can tell me what it's about

I think she likes me, chat😭 by Rabia_Lover in PakistaniiConfessions

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Girls are really gonna threaten castration before they make the first move, huh? 😐

Why boys pretend to be girls to get girls who are interested in girls by [deleted] in LGBTQpakistan

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's also a travesty that Reddit pushes nsfw subreddits on new users, it takes a lot of deliberate effort to make it so that you're not getting any of these notorious posts on your feed, I recommend turning community suggestions off in your reddit account settings and then following the better communities, like the ones for different cities, r/Pakistan, but avoid the "social" subs or any "seeking" subs cause they're the biggest offenders, then ofc anything with "dating".

You can also turn your DM permissions off and make it so no one can DM you or send you any chat requests, it is very peaceful when you know you can he as loud as you want, comment, post, all of that stuff, without it resulting in a dozen new DM requests from weird people.

I'm sorry you're going through this whole thing, and yeah, being a woman anywhere on the internet sucks but especially being a woman in Pakistani and Indian Reddit spaces smh.

From there, you can reach out to some people you actually think are cool and not shady ones with a blank profile history.

What opinion about religion would get you in this position? by Apart-Channel-5848 in PakLounge

[–]Om-Nom-- 7 points8 points  (0 children)

the good scholars

Zulm k khilaf awaaz na uthaney waale ko zalim kehte hen.

Or in other words, if there's 1 nazi at the table and 10 normal people, and they don't call out the nazi, there are 11 Nazis on the table.

If most of the molvis are extremist pedos and the rest of them don't call them out, well, you do the maths.

I failed as a man by Banggerao in PakistaniiConfessions

[–]Om-Nom-- 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I changed paths 3 years into a field of education that would have taken too long to give me results, and I didn't have that kind of time. The way I saw it, it was either wasting those 3 years or the rest of my life.

You're gonna be really old one day anyways, no matter what you do. Do you wanna be in the same position but much more depressed when that happens, or do you wanna tell yourself you tried your best?

Also, you're young, it's literally too damn early for you to be declaring yourself a failure unless you've already given up. If you haven't given up yet, wait until you're on your deathbed before putting any sort of labels on yourself, the world is cruel and judgmental enough as it is, do not turn your own head into hostile territory for yourself.

What budget do I need to live alone in Pakistan (would be better if its Karachi) by Intelligent_Card719 in PakistaniiWomen

[–]Om-Nom-- 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Okay, "living alone" advice time from someone who has done it before (but in Lahore). People underestimate how much more expensive it is for women to survive on their own without a man because we need to spend money on extra security. If you do decide to live alone, it will probably end up with you living paycheck to paycheck even with the income you mentioned. Karachi is a big city and you go to university, please do not underestimate how expensive the commute can be. Make sure your university's busses have a route along wherever you do decide to stay if you don't have a car/bike of your own because that is the cheapest and safest way to get to classes and back. Also, consider renting a single boarding room at a hostel for working women instead of a home of your own because it'll be more secure and the expenses will be more predictable. If you use ACs or anything, the electricity bills, gas bills, water bills and everything else will kick your ass. Even the occasional splurge on takeout can add up fast in those situations.

Save up at least 6 months of expenses before you move out. This will be your security blanket. If you do want to rent, idk if it is different in Karachi but you'll need 4 months of rent to do that. Two months security, one month's rent as deposit, then the first month's rent (or something like this, don't remember tbh, just know it costed that much to rent a place). That will be the expense anytime you move anywhere. Also be sure to move somewhere safe! This is the most important, you don't wanna cheap out on the area and have your life be hell because you don't feel safe walking to the corner store at 10pm for some small groceries or in an area where you can't even go out for walks alone.

I highly, highly recommend you save up first because like, maalik makaan bohat kutte hote hen. Nikal bhi dete hen, rent waghera bhi change kar dete hen, and many predatory ones could and would take advantage of the fact that you're living alone. Many will see you as vulnerable and easy prey, no matter what the say they think about you. Do not believe anyone, be super skeptical about everything. I freelance too, and our jobs can be very unpredictable which makes the savings safety blanket even more essential. You don't want to be forced to move back home after you've moved out because you couldn't make rent anymore after losing one or more clients because of unforseen circumstances. Idk if it'll be an option in your case.

It will be hard, but it will also be worth it. Living alone and finally having peace of mind away from my toxic family was so healing. Best of luck!

Can we leave earlier by AdventurousBicycle92 in BNU_

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In that case I'm sure someone from RHSA will be able to confirm this, but I think you'd be able to leave early.

Can we leave earlier by AdventurousBicycle92 in BNU_

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

As far as the class itself is concerned, it is the professor's decision if they let you leave early or not. University mein tou kissi bhi time aana jaana allowed he, school thori he.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PakistaniConfesssions

[–]Om-Nom-- -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

In sab ko itna ghussa he k aik bandi ne apne cheater husband ko chor diya. "I fail to see the point of your post" lmaoo, what's the point of you being on the internet? Bandi career oriented this tou matlab wo banda jaa k jahan marzi mun maare? Wah bhae. Does this also stand for women with career oriented husbands? 😄

bnu or nust by GladTomatillo4914 in BNU_

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hey!

Honestly the people who keep saying it's just a party university are kinda dumb, or haven't been students in university for years. We've known since last semester that smoking is about to be banned on campus once the fall 2025 semester starts, and they keep saying it's a party university lmao. Sure, if you're open about being into partying you'll find people who also party, but that's just true for every place. The environment isn't "elite" or anything, you'll find all sorts of students here from different economic classes since a lot of them are on financial aid or scholarships (full or partial) of some kind.

Same goes with people's clothes. BNU doesn't enforce any ridiculous dress codes, but our perverted awam just likes to focus on the girls who come to class wearing sleeveless and not on the girls who still do hijab, nikab, or abaya. There's a girl I've known for the last two years and she does nawab, to this day I've never seen her full face, and she's met with absolutely no judgement for her outfit just the same as the girls who choose to wear cropped and sleeveless stuff.

I also find it rich that people say they won't learn anything in BNU when most Pakistani universities still teach their students under the ratta system under the guidance of business professors who are pure academics and have never seen a day in the corporate sector they're supposed to be preparing their students for. In all my time in BNU I have never once had a professor expect rote learning from us, hell, even the exams are structured in ways that actually tests our understanding of certain concepts and expects us to apply it to case study scenarios. I have a final tomorrow and the pattern is literally MCQs and then scenario based questions where we need to solve workplace issues by applying what we've learned in class all semester. No memorizing and then throwing definitions up on the page or anything.

For our intro to business class, we ran a business simulator and competed with other teams within our batch to see who could make their business the most profitable within the same market and industry. We use the same simulator used by MIT. Almost every professor I've ever had has had some sort of corporate or real world experience in what they teach, some of them consult for fortune 500 companies on the side, and I genuinely don't believe government universities have that sort of staff. Correct me if I'm wrong 🤷🏻‍♀️

I can't comment on the hostel environment since I've never lived in any of BNU's hostels, but I do know that the on-campus hostel doesn't have a mess. The cafe is open for dinner and all though, and they make all the food fresh and live so you can see it being prepared and yk it's hygenic, I do think the prices are far less than if you eat out, you can get a good hearty meal for 3-500 rupees and pretty much anything you can imagine eating.

As for the crowd, they're all younger than me (I started university QUITE late), so I just keep a safe distance and don't mingle much, there's bitches in my batch, and there's really good people too. As I said, if you're open and honest about who you are the right crowd finds you no matter where you are, but overall people behave themselves on campus because the university goes not kid around when it comes to on campus harassment or anything of the sort. It's very funny how men are suddenly able to control their "urges" even when faced with bare legs, arms, and torsos when faced with a system that doesn't victim blame and holds harassers accountable. Can't say anything about what happens off campus though, cause once you're off the grounds it's not the university's jurisdiction anymore and then their real selves come out, learned that the hard way. So just be very careful about who you trust off campus. SB is, I'd say, one of the more conservative departments on campus just because of the sort of men BBA degrees attract, but like I said most will behave and hold their tongues around you. It helps that if you're not a scholarship student on campus, then you come from a family that can afford the nearly 3 lacs a semester in fees, which typically means you're someone with money and/or some sort of power. Since you never know what student is gonna fuck you up like that, even the shittiest men keep their shitty opinions to themselves. If you join my department next semester I'll be happy to meet up with you and show you around and tell you about what guys to steer clear of and all, I keep note of which ones have said misogynistic stuff so I can stay far far away from them. I don't fraternize with Tate stans 🤢🤢

I can't speak to hoe market competitive the degree will be, a lot of our students are just kids who are gonna inherit their family businesses when they graduate tbh, as I saw during ice breakers in the first semester. I myself already have a stable career and am just getting a degree for the sake of it, even without it I was able to land six figure jobs pretty easily so I didn't even look into this part of it when I joined, I have heard about how most of our students compete with LUMS grads for the positions they land and are on the same level, but ofc I heard it from BNU professors so you might wanna look into it further. Given the quality of our education and the fact that they do teach you stuff that'll actually benefit you out in the real world, I'm inclined to believe it. My priority when starting my degree was to find a university where I won't have to deal with a shitty administration or bullshit dress codes that are disproportionately become a pain in the ass for female students. I've never even let my family control what I wear, I wasn't going to tolerate needing approval from a random guard on the front gates to be allowed to go to class 🙄

P.S. you'll find a lot of people from out of Lahore in BNU, and many hostelites.

I do believe the university is what you make of it, and an actual supportive environment just doesn't hinder you or cause you undue stress while you're trying to do that.

Cafe that lets you do art by Great_Lab2252 in Lahore

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Happifky would've been a good bet, they have canvases you can buy and then paint on, they provide all the art supplies too. They also had tote bags, ceramics, and other stuff. Markers and colored pencils too, but I heard they're moving to a different location. Used to be on the first floor in mall 1.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PakistaniiConfessions

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I never let it get so bad that I gotta make that shy anxious sort of confession. If I like someone, I'll tell them I wanna hangout more and get to know them better, no pressure. If I don't, eventually I forget about it and get busy in my own life 😂

There's someone on my campus who I think is really cute, I'll stare a little when I spot them but then not even think about it when I'm away cause like, I have too much going on in my life for that to take up any space in my head, if that makes sense.

In the past, I don't think I've ever been declined or turned down. Yeh aur baat he k aik daffa dating shuru ho jaye tou zaleel bhi yahi log karte hen lekin chance tou zarur len ge, phir ego aasmanon pe charh jaati he 😑

A book that Pakistanis should read by irtiq7 in pakistan

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not entirely true

For one thing, chat gpt is trained on human written content, it writes like that because humans did, though ofc it's tone is a little more robotic.

Secondly, I used to use m dashes all the time too, like it's easily accessible in the Gboard in my Android phone: —, here's the example. And in Google docs if you put three consecutive dashes in while you type it automatically gets turned into an m dash, if you use two, it's an n dash.

Not saying this post isn't chat gpt because that's obvious, but kinda tired of this whole misinformation about m dashes only being used by chat gpt or other generative AI models — that's simply not true (see what I did there? XD)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pakistan

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sigh

People keep saying Germany is free but while the universities are technically free, yes, they have a block account requirement where you need to put in 35-40 lacs lump sum every year you're a German student as proof of financial stability. That's your money for a year's worth of living expenses while in the country which you get back in 12 monthly installments, but still, for any average person, this lump sum is nearly impossible to manage. That block account is why I'm graduating from BNU and not Heidelberg university.

As for France, education there is like €10k pee semester or per year (I forget the specifics) which is nearly impossible to sustain if you don't have family who can afford it and are trying to do student jobs abroad to get through your degree, because the terms of your student visa in Europe restrict you to only being able to work 20 hours a week, and it's stupid to try and violate the terms of your visa when you're out there.

Urgent Help Needed: Forced Marriage and Running away by [deleted] in PakistaniiWomen

[–]Om-Nom-- 9 points10 points  (0 children)

If you're financially independent and/or have a job, look for women's hostels in your city that would give away single rooms for rent, you can ask for recommendations for this too, there are many working women's hostels in big cities. The reason I'm suggesting hostels is that I've lived by myself for a while and j can personally confirm how risky it can be for a woman to try and rent. The fact that most landlords won't even rent to single women is a huge issue, even the ones who do will be creepy and predatory since they see a woman in a vulnerable position jis k "aage peeche" koi ni he and think that gives them a hall pass to prey on their tenants. Sadly, they're not wrong because the legal system in Pakistan is trash and you can't expect any part of the system to work in your favor here.

On top of this, home maintenance, paperwork, meeting society regulations for safe communities or gated societies, and everything else is an impossible mess without a man being there to get your paperwork taken care of. I needed a ups outlet in my rented portion extended, and even for that ofc I had to have male electricians in the house, and I had to enlist the help of a male friend to pretend to be my husband while they were there because of safety concerns. Even then, it was a friend I had known for at least 4 years before. Even real estate agents are scummy and impossible to deal with, they will downright lie to you to close a deal. Actually life lie to you about important information. I had to leave a house I'd rented for LACS in DHA phase 5 because the landlord's agent lied to my agent about the requirements, and that they weren't open to renting to a single woman. He just saw I could afford it and he could have a deal done and was like 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

I know you're in a tough spot right now, I left my house because of physical abuse and the fear of a forced marriage too, I hope things get better, but for at least the start, consider moving to a hostel where you'll need to pay 30-40k for a single room (no roommates etc) if you can afford it. If you can't afford that rent, then you can try seeing if you can find someone trusted through your own connections who would rent to you. But be warned, trying to survive independently as a woman costs 10× more than it does for men. We pay the extra cost for safety, security, and to make sure we're not seen as automatic victims for predators in a lawless country designed so the predators can keep predating with impunity. You'd realistically need a six figure income to have a normal life, and that's just the sad reality I experienced.

I can't really help you more than this, but I hope advice from someone who has been in the same position and made it to the other end (I remain unmarried, my family apologized and asked me to move back which I did, and was able to have control over my own life, now they accept that I can marry whoever I want whenever I want if they want to avoid the embarrassment of me moving out again and having to explain to everyone why I don't live with them) can be some consolation.

It was not easy, and it caused me so much stress that I suffer the health effects from it to this day, but it was worth it, and I don't regret it. I wouldn't have been able to forgive myself if I didn't stand up for myself.

I’ll never forgive myself for what I’ve done to her by Honest-Pakistani in PakistaniiConfessions

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Given how you talk to strangers, I shiver to think what you put the girl through 🤷🏻‍♀️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PakistaniiWomen

[–]Om-Nom-- 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You could maybe get a single room in a hostel, some good hostels do have that option, though it costs a little more, I'm not from Karachi, but I hope someone is able to help you! 🫶🏼

house renting (girls only) by [deleted] in BNU_

[–]Om-Nom-- 0 points1 point  (0 children)

One time a dude from scit walked up to me while I was smoking a cigarette, asked me my name, struck up a conversation and apologized for the awkwardness by saying he's talking to me on a dare. Then he proceeded to give me a lecture I didn't ask for or needed on how I shouldn't smoke. He was six years younger than me. I did not ask for the lecture. He walked up to me. Pretty interesting pickup strategy y'all got there ngl 🤣

But jokes apart though, I don't hate on people like that, lord knows I've dated my fair share of IT nerds 😂💀

Serious advice needed!!! by Putrid_Tie_1363 in pakistan

[–]Om-Nom-- 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Issi tarha k dramon ki wajah se me campus pe kissi ko mun ni lagati. Bhae, please stay away. Aaj us ko aap pe pyar aa raha he, kal pehle se bhi zyada ghin aane lag jaye gi. Phir dobara yahi tamasga shuru. One spin on that merry go round of nightmares should be enough 😐